Rambling 163: Bad Relationship Advice 5
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The duo continues answering listener questions on love and romance. Using their romantic expertise and hands-on experience with all manner of mental and emotional disciplines, the duo tries to race through more of the leftover Valentine’s Day questions they could not get to previously. The mission? Make Love Great Again!
+Episode Details
Topics Discussed
- Caught Neighbor Cheating! 02:53
- My partner finds others attractive! 07:31
- I hate when my partner touches me. 11:07
- Leaving my abusive partner without warning. 14:19
- My partner gives me silent treatment to hurt me. 17:42
- I’m not my partners best sexual experience. 20:42
- My partner cheated with a married person! 26:31
- My partner thirst traps, but tells me. Red flag? 31:42
- Partner checks through my phone, although finds nothing. Why? 35:09
- Caught mom cheating on dad!!! 39:16
- Bestfriend and Boyfriend are too close for my comfort. 44:19
- Partner wants divorce, but I don’t. What to do? 47:53
- I'm in love with my best friend and don't want to hear about their love life. 50:35
- Partner loves someone else. What to do? 54:37
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+Transcript
Cristina: This program contains strong themes meant for a mature audience. Discretion is advised.
Jack: Going live in 5, 4.
Cristina: What does live mean?
Jack: welcome to the Rambling Podcast, the show where we work on humanity's most absurd and baffling ideas in childish ways. I am your love guru, Jack.
Cristina: And I am your host, Christina.
Jack: And if you have yet, remember to hit that subscribe button to get notified the second new Suave episodes are released.
Cristina: Also, this show is most enjoyable with a listening partner to share opinions and ideas on topics we discuss.
Jack: Yes. So go pull your partner up on that love seat, get a blanket. Get nice and close and watch their hands drift and the blanket start jumping.
Cristina: Are you really gonna do that voice this whole time? That'd be amazing if you do it.
Jack: Just super suave. Slick back hair. I got slick back hair for this episode.
Cristina: You should try one question. It doesn't have to be the first. It will be a random question.
Jack: Got you. I'm wearing a suit, too. I'm wearing a suit. I have a rose in my mouth. I only sound clear because I've practiced for years. Because this is a romance podcast.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: And today what we're doing on this romance podcast is because last time we had many, many, many, many, many submissions, and we didn't get the half of them. There were too many.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: And so we're gonna. We're gonna try to race through a bunch of these. Probably not gonna get through all of them, but any of you, we don'. Too bad for you. We're just.
Cristina: See you next year.
Jack: See you next year. S***.
Cristina: Again.
Jack: Hopefully you got the same problem by then, and then you can ask again.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: You know, it's possible. S***. If you've been struggling with this problem for a year, bro, just break up and go somewhere else. Yeah.
Cristina: Yes. That's your solution. There you go.
Jack: Yeah.
Cristina: For anyone who didn't get their answer.
Jack: Just break up and go do something else. Yes, that's the solution. If you don't show up in this episode, break up and do something else.
Cristina: What if it's not even, like, a huge problem?
Jack: No, it doesn't matter. Doesn't matter. Oh, she always eats my cheesecake. And I love cheesecake. And I love her very. Break up and go date somebody else.
Cristina: Wow.
Jack: Somebody who doesn't eat your f****** cheesecake. You ask because it was that much of a problem in the first place. Right. Because the f****** cheesecake is everything. It's her or the cheesecake. Well, choose the f****** cheesecake. Thug life.
Cristina: That's crazy. Then he finds out he was allergic to cheesecake and then dies.
Jack: Anyways. Everybody lives. Wait, how the f*** did he love cheesecake?
Cristina: He never got to taste it.
Jack: She always ate. She was saving his life.
Cristina: She was exactly fair.
Jack: Fair. Anyway, so yeah, we're gonna answer questions that were left over from last week, which was quite a plethora, and we're gonna get through a bunch of them and then the rest of you. Well, your analog. Too bad.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: So let's do it.
Cristina: The first question is the neighbor is cheating on his wife with another neighbor. I've seen it all happen. Don't know what to do. Should I tell my neighbor her husband is cheating on her?
Jack: Interesting. This is technically relationship problem, but it's not their relationship problem.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: Do you know this is a fun, fun spot to be in. You should send subtle hints to everybody and start f****** with their heads for no reason. Don't let them know too.
Cristina: Don't let them know.
Jack: Don't let them know it's you. You just leave subtle hints. Maybe somebody's here when you're not and you just leave that note.
Cristina: You just say things like that.
Jack: Say random abstract s*** like that. Like maybe there's a different woman who shows up when you leave the house and you just don't tell anybody who said I just showed up in the mail. You send it to her job call, you know, get home ahead of time.
Jack: Just tell her that. Oh, get home ahead of time.
Cristina: Oh, you're hinting to her to find out.
Jack: Maybe you don't tell her what, she's getting home ahead of time.
Cristina: Oh.
Jack: Do small things like that, making both parties super paranoid.
Cristina: Oh, both parties. So you kind of hint at him that you know.
Jack: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like I know what you did. He didn't think it's his wife. He doesn't f******. He's just gonna stop. We can't f*** with him, we gotta f*** with her.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: Wait, who's a cheater? It's her. Him, him, him. Okay. Yeah, the typical guy. S***.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: So I bet she's way hot.
Cristina: Who?
Jack: His wife that he's cheating on. Isn't that how it goes? You just find some garbage just like B rate and you're f****** like your straight 10 out of 10 wife gets cheated on because you feel insecure that she makes more money and is way hot so you f****** cheat on her with some garbage that's unemployed and looks like the f****** t*** that your wife left in the toilet.
Cristina: Yes. Maybe she's a wife that works too hard. She's she from the last Episode. He can't have sex with her because she works too much, and so he's.
Jack: Oh, s***. He took my advice. Yeah, he's just out here f****** somebody else. Oh, fair enough. Don't get caught, bro.
Cristina: This person just got him.
Jack: Oh, yeah, this person got him. Oh, God, he sucks. But yeah, no, f*** with their heads. That's definitely the way to go. It's not your business. Like, let's be real. Whatever. It ain't your business. You don't have to tell anybody anything. Plus, bro code, what the f***? You don't just rat a dude out. You try to get him caught, but you don't tell.
Cristina: Yeah, I guess. Please. Also, you don't have truth, so it sounds like drama.
Jack: Yes. You.
Cristina: You and the wife. So, like, if she doesn't want to believe, it's just. She's gonna have a problem with you.
Jack: Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a whole problem. Stay out of it, but stay in it.
Cristina: Stay, you know, stay out of it.
Jack: Visibly, but, you know, keep looking.
Cristina: What if you just record it?
Jack: That works.
Cristina: I don't know, like, if it's happening right in front of your house or something, you can see it through your window.
Jack: Yeah. You can even aim a camera at it.
Cristina: Mmm.
Jack: You know, when it happens regularly, you've seen it for a while.
Cristina: Yeah. Is that obvious for you? I mean, then maybe other neighbors know. I don't know.
Jack: Ask other neighbors. Get a committee of neighbors together and talk about the lady who's being cheated on by the guy who's a total cheater.
Cristina: Start a fan club and then find.
Jack: Out if the lady who he's cheating. Wait, no. Because it's cheating with a different neighbor. That's part of the question.
Cristina: Oh, yes. That's another neighbor, too.
Jack: So gossip about that other neighbor and call her a w****. It's very important that you just call her a w****. A home wrecking w****. Just be to her back.
Cristina: To her back, to her back.
Jack: But make sure she hears the whispers.
Cristina: Okay.
Jack: That everybody knows, oh, she's a home wrecking w****. And then you. You subtly hint at the wife. You're like, that lady over there is a home wrecking w****. Oh, real. Who. Who's. Who's home? Are they home wrecking? And then get really awkward and say nothing.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: But you never directly say yours. Yeah, you just say, oh, that's the homewrecking w****. Oh, wow, really? Who's home? And then just put your head down. Say nothing.
Cristina: Yes. And every. If every neighbor is doing this, she'll eventually, like, at first she'll be like, it's gotta be that neighbor. Nah, it's gotta be that one.
Jack: And then she eventually she's like, am I the home who's wrecked?
Cristina: Yes. That sounds awesome.
Jack: Yeah. That's a very reasonable way to handle.
Cristina: The situation and not be in anyone's business at the same time.
Jack: And not be in anyone's business. You get them caught, you never ratted on him, and the wife finds out, yay.
Cristina: Everyone wins.
Jack: And you got to call somebody a home wrecking w**** without it being incorrect.
Cristina: That is fun.
Jack: Yes. You win. You won situational lottery. Yes. Not truthfully.
Cristina: Not truthfully. Yeah.
Jack: People just say it because they're angry.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: Interesting.
Cristina: This time it's for real.
Jack: This is the for real thing.
Cristina: Yeah. The next question is, my boyfriend has been looking at other women's butts wherever we go. That behavior is really getting on my nerves and making me feel insecure. I can't understand because we have a great relationship and I don't know what to say or should I say anything? I'm thankful for any opinions?
Jack: This is a ridiculously common problem in the world that people need to learn how to deal with, and it is ridiculous, insecure people. He's not in the wrong. She is.
Cristina: He's not in the.
Jack: This probably sounded like I was saying, like, well, there's a bunch of men who need to control themselves. No. Get your s*** together. Obviously him liking you doesn't instantaneously just mean everybody else stops being attractive and everybody else stops being interesting. No, no. Monogamy is when, despite that fact, you are committed to one person. That does not mean everybody else stopped being attractive and everybody else stopped being interesting. And you can't have f****** lady friends because. Shut the f*** up. Look, your boyfriend is a guy. You be blind. Is that the answer here? Be blind? How dare you see other people's butts to get over your. The fact that he's with you tells you way more information.
Cristina: So should she say anything, she should say nothing.
Jack: She should learn to control her emotions and stop putting her insecurities as if they're his fault. That's your insecurity, not his insecurity. That's your emotions. Learn to manage your emotions.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: Don't put s*** on somebody else when it's your fault. Oh, what he's doing is making me. Nobody can make you feel any kind of f****** way. That's impossible. You feel away because of something happening inside you.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: In response to the situation.
Cristina: Just learn to deal with her feelings.
Jack: She should learn to understand why she feels insecure about this.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: You should just sit, meditate and ask, why does this bother me if he's.
Cristina: With me and he's great and they. She said they have a great relationship.
Jack: You have a great relationship. So why is this enough for you to start having doubts? You're kind of a bad girlfriend because small, trivial s*** is enough for you to start questioning. Maybe he deserves better. Yeah, maybe that's not right because you're just blaming your insecurities on him. That's inappropriate. Why is it that it's up to him to manage your emotions, to manage your concerns and your worries? If again, you have a great relationship, you know he's going to do anything. And the fact that he's even telling you outwardly means at least he's secure and trusts you. And you're just in your head being deceitful and not agreeing with any of it.
Cristina: And you're just like, said that when he first brought it up. Like, I don't feel comfortable about this.
Jack: Yeah.
Cristina: At the moment that she felt.
Jack: And then. And then unpack. Why? Because it shouldn't be. Like, if he enjoys doing this as a part of him, are you going to change who he is for you? Then you're fine. You suck.
Cristina: Yeah. If.
Jack: If he's a person who just likes to look at pretty people and comment on how pretty they are, and then you're in your insecurity and in your emotions judging him for it and thinking he should change, then you don't like who he is. You like who he could be.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: In which case, go find a person who's already that and don't put him through this f******. You're leading him on. Essentially.
Cristina: Yeah. Calm down.
Jack: Yeah. Calm your emotions or go be with somebody else, but don't. Don't make this his fault.
Cristina: Yes. Okay. Yeah.
Jack: This is highly inappropriate. Highly inappropriate.
Cristina: Yeah. Yeah. Interesting. The next question is, I love my husband, but I hate kissing him or even him touching me. Everything about this is disgusting to me and I hate it. I can't take it anymore, but I can't do anything about it. I've tried talking to him, but it's like he forgets in the day after. What do I do now?
Jack: Interesting. This is a weird problem because a lot of relationships, a lot of people need physical contact and they like to give physical contact, and it's how they show love. And if it feels like he's trying to show love through physical contact, which you do not like you're. You're talking. Well, this is Interesting.
Cristina: Because so much questions about it, like, how long has she had this problem with him? Did this just happen overnight or something?
Jack: Oh, it's her husband. Interesting. So this is actually while they're dating.
Cristina: Was anything happening?
Jack: This is a compatibility issue. There shouldn't be together 100% because she's forcing herself to tolerate something that she genuinely feels disgusted by.
Cristina: Yeah. Like.
Jack: And he. This is kind of like the other thing. He's being kind of let on. Well, no, she was honest about it. Nevertheless.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: But he. Again, his way of showing love is totally different. And if he were to do it your way, then he's missing out.
Cristina: Yes. He's missing out on. Yeah, this needs.
Jack: Yeah, this is a compatibility issue.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: You got divorce your f****** husband. That is the real response here. I'm not even joking about this one. Usually I attach a joke. This is real. Actually. We don't normally get a problem that's like a real problem. It's just people and their stupid bullshit, which is why it's funny when they send it to us, knowing we're gonna rip them apart. But I got nothing for you, man. This is like a real issue.
Cristina: This is probably worth a divorce.
Jack: Yeah.
Cristina: It's just. It's too.
Jack: It's too much. Yeah, it's too much. Or you have to consider branching into an open relations. The problem with that logic is he would still show you physical affection. That's what he wants because he loves you. Even if you had somebody, it's not a sex thing. If it was a sex thing, then that would make sense. That an open relationship, I guess could solve that because you go the other person and be emotional with this person. But the problem here is the physical affection.
Cristina: Yeah. That's part. That's more emotional than sexual.
Jack: Yeah. So the idea would be that. Are you the side piece? And then he goes and gets. He divorces you, but keeps dating you and only shows up to f*** you. And then he goes and has his wife that he touches.
Cristina: I don't know. Because she doesn't even want to be touched. So does she even want to have sex with him?
Jack: Interesting. This is very interesting. Fascinating. Are you. Have you lost all interest in physical contact with your husband at any scale?
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: And if that's the case, f****** divorce him. Don't. Don't do this. I know it sucks and emotions. I'm a cry. Get the f*** out of here. Be an adult.
Cristina: Yeah, it's. It's unfair.
Jack: Yeah, it's unfair. It's highly unfair. Because if he conforms to you Then he suffers. And if you right now are suffering conforming to him, there's no.
Cristina: There's no winning.
Jack: There's no winning. You guys got to go your separate ways legitimately. I'm not even gonna joke. You guys gotta get divorced. That is the solution here.
Cristina: Gotta say goodbye. Yep. The next question is, I'm leaving my abusive partner tomorrow without notice. Without notice while he's at work. But some people say it's too harsh. Am I doing the right thing?
Jack: You said abusive. No, you are not.
Cristina: No, f*** him.
Jack: Leave. Get a restraining order. Make a video, post it on the Internet telling everybody how abusive he was. Contact the woke left blue haired, fat, overweight lesbian. She they hims, the Zed people and tell them to go, cancel your abusive now ex. And they'll make.
Cristina: Stop talking to those people that are saying that you're being too harsh.
Jack: Yeah, that's probably some f******. That was probably a guy. Her male friends is probably her male friends. Yeah. Who would also hit their own women. Your male friends were beating the s*** out of their own women are the ones who just straight up told you, no, you're being too harsh.
Cristina: What? It's crazy.
Jack: What if I hit you, you're going to f****** leave me too? It's like, yes, that should be the f****** goal.
Cristina: Or this is family. I don't know.
Jack: There's no justification. No justification. Just get the f*** out of. That's ridiculous.
Cristina: Run away.
Jack: Take beatings for no reason. Yeah, well, she didn't specify what kind of abuse could be verbal abuse. It doesn't matter. Abuse is abuse. Yeah, it doesn't matter because you're getting abused regardless. F*** them.
Cristina: Those people are also abusive.
Jack: Yeah, the ones who are like, just accepting it and like, well, you're being too harsh. Let them abuse you. What? Question mark.
Cristina: Yeah. Yeah. That's crazy.
Jack: It's f*****. People are idiots. You need better friends or some s***.
Cristina: Mm. Just run away. Go to a new town.
Jack: Beat the s*** out of me again. Look at my black eye. I'm about to grab all my things and just leave while he's at work one day. No, don't do that. What about his emotions? What about my face, bro?
Cristina: Is that how those characters sounded like? I feel like that's how she sounds like, I guess.
Jack: I don't know. But yeah. No, it's ridiculous. Get the out of there. The Are you even there for Still I don't get this. I'm scared to leave. What the f***?
Cristina: Just run. Here's Never look back.
Jack: This is what blows my f****** mind. Right. The rationale of people who get abused and stay in. Okay, let's use one. One example. Why don't you leave him if he's abusive? Well, I love him. Okay, so we'll excuse that one because that's your dynamic. Right. Their dynamic is she likes being beat or if he doesn't like. Well, you can't love him and like it.
Cristina: I don't know.
Jack: Like if you enjoy being beat, then you don't think it's being B. It's just part of what's happening. The fact that you describe it as being, being.
Cristina: Then you're doing something. You're just. Do you love him?
Jack: Do you love the fact that he does something you don't like? Is that what the is happening? Because how do you get beat and stay. Oh, I love him. What do you love specifically? Is he kind? Is he. Does he treat you with what part? Where. Where is the love coming?
Cristina: It was that first week that they got together.
Jack: Yeah, I'm infatuated. Thus love. But that's not totally ridiculous.
Cristina: That is just go, go, go, go.
Jack: Run away, run away. It doesn't make sense to stay with somebody who is beating you at all.
Cristina: Or people who are cool with it.
Jack: Yeah, that's a weird one.
Cristina: Yeah, that's very weird. Wrong. The next question is, my wife shuts me out a lot whenever she doesn't get her way. She hasn't spoken to me since yesterday morning and won't communicate with me and tell me why. It is really horrible and it hurts me very much. I don't want to engage in an angry altercation, but instead want to just show her that her actions are childish and just because I am hurt doesn't mean that she wins. How can I do that?
Jack: So your wife shuts down and doesn't communicate. But we all know that one of the most important things to a successful relationship is communication. So she's actively cutting communication because emotions and then assuming that if you feel bad, she has won, your wife is kind of a monster and divorce her. This is stupid now. This is dumb because she's a f****** kid and bro, why. Why do you want to be with somebody whose actions are childish?
Cristina: She feels like she wins because.
Jack: Yeah, if you feel bad, she feels like she wins. So she's not really. She doesn't like you, dude.
Cristina: That is so scary.
Jack: She enjoys making you feel like s***. Yeah, that's where she gets off. I don't understand. This is what I mean by most situations are stupid.
Cristina: How did this happen?
Jack: It's ridiculous. It's a form of abuse.
Cristina: It is. He's also being abused.
Jack: He's being emotionally abused. And then he stays. But it's like, what the f***? Why do people stay when they're being abused? I don't understand what the mentality is. Oh, but I love her. But what do you love about her? Just explain it. Tell me what you love about her. Because it doesn't seem like there's something. Oh, she's the mother of my. Shut the f*** up. That's not love. Nah, that's biology, bro.
Cristina: Yeah, they can happen with anyone.
Jack: Oh, but at the beginning, it was fine. Yes. Is this still the beginning? No. Then shut the f*** up. That's past. That's ended.
Cristina: That ended. This is the new her.
Jack: Oh, but what about the good times? That's also in the past. The f***.
Cristina: Yeah. People change.
Jack: People change. And she's changed for the way worse. Unless you f****** were into this to begin with, which then comes back to dynamics. If you. You are here because of it. Why the f*** did you send us this as a question?
Cristina: Yeah, if you knew her like this before you guys got married, like, this.
Jack: Is about you, not about her. Yeah, you're the one who's like, no, I'm having doubts. Too late.
Cristina: What? What? You put yourself in the situation.
Jack: You said, I do after knowing this. So get the out of here. So either get the out because she doesn't like you and she seems pretty horrible. Your wife sounds like a dude and.
Cristina: Or she's a monster.
Jack: Yeah, dude, she's horrible. So your wife is total garbage. Get out. Unless you're in it, in which case this was a waste of our f****** time.
Cristina: Yes, unless you're bragging to us secretly.
Jack: I don't know. She treats me like s***. I bet you guys got healthy relationships. It's like, what the f***?
Cristina: I don't know. Maybe someone's into bragging about their horrible. I don't know.
Jack: He probably feels like it's great. I am bleeding, therefore I am the victor.
Cristina: Oh, you see? It's happening in real life. Whoa. The next question is, my girlfriend and I played a game with another couple. Girlfriend got asked, what has been your most intense sexual experience? And she mentioned her ex friend with benefits. I honestly just want to cancel the vacation I have planned for us. Like, I am so hurt. What do I do and say here?
Jack: In what?
Cristina: What? They want to cancel plans because they're so hurt because their girlfriend said that her most intense sexual experience was with her ex friend with benefits.
Jack: Right. So the. I don't Understand the problem though. Okay. Okay. Why so like, bro, walk me through this ideology. You're like, anybody I be with, I must be the best sex they've had. That's just like where you. You begin. That's point A. If I'm not the best they've had, I'm doing something wrong. Bro, there are too many people in the world for you to really believe you're gonna be the best everybody's had.
Cristina: Yes. I don't know. It's a weird. I don't know. It's not really a problem here.
Jack: This. No, this is some dude's crazy delusion of like, I thought it was me. But why? What did you do? That was so astounding and mind blowing.
Cristina: I just assumed that they would be the answer.
Jack: Because sex. I'm the best at it. Yeah, it's like, what, because you have sex, you're the best at it? Yeah, she had sex with me, therefore I am the best sex she had. And it hurts me that she said I'm not. But why?
Cristina: But why? You're not the first. It doesn't. Like she has a history.
Jack: Yeah, like you could have been the best and you just so happen to not have been. What is the problem? I don't understand. You can't pot. You can't. No, dude, you can't really expect every relationship you go into to be like sex Adonis, I would say.
Cristina: Do not cancel this vacation though.
Jack: Don't stupid.
Cristina: Try to get over yourself.
Jack: Get over yourself, bro.
Cristina: Step one, learn about this experience. And then, I don't know, you gotta up it, I guess.
Jack: Sure do better. Always aim to do better. But why do you need to be the best?
Cristina: That is true. That's true.
Jack: Weird.
Cristina: I don't know.
Jack: Let's look at like this. Does she enjoy sex with you? Yes. Okay, okay. And does she still you? Yes. Okay. So why do you need to have been the best? What does this do in your life? What does this do in her life?
Cristina: Exactly. Like, that wasn't even her boyfriend. That was just a friend. She. You're her boyfriend for a reason, you know, like, at least in her point of view, you're the best in other ways. Like, you don't have to be the best.
Jack: Wait, that guy wasn't her boyfriend? Is the conversation here that she was with this guy and she had sex with some other dude?
Cristina: No, her ex friend was benefit was her.
Jack: Oh, got you. Got you. Yeah, that makes perfect sense. Nevertheless, they weren't f****** because they felt obligation to. They were just having fun. And when you enjoy something for the sake of the thing. It is better than when you do something because you feel you have to.
Cristina: Which would be the. In a relationship.
Jack: Which would be. In a relationship, you probably feel more obligated. Thus, it loses some of the excitement of just genuinely enjoying what you're doing.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: Because there's no obligation or strings. It's just the thing. In this case, there's no. No. Dude, get the out of here. Dude. Get over yourself.
Cristina: Get over yourself.
Jack: What? How ridiculous, bro. You over here swearing I. I was the best until she said it out loud. Doesn't want the dude.
Cristina: Like, why did you assume. Yeah, like, I think you hurt yourself the most.
Jack: Maybe. Okay, maybe she says things when they're doing it right, and. Oh, my God, you're so big. Oh, my God, you're so good. And she's not lying. Oh, it feels so good. Oh, my God, this is so. And you just, like, in your head. Oh, my God. But that's what sex is, bro. That's literally what sex is. It doesn't mean you're the best just because she's way into it. And if that's what led you to believe she's the best. How old are you, dude?
Cristina: How.
Jack: How old are you?
Cristina: Age. It matters.
Jack: Dudes has to be, like, a team.
Cristina: Oh, okay.
Jack: So Cali, the pipe, bro.
Cristina: Oh, okay. Like, an older man shouldn't be.
Jack: He's not gonna give a dude. Another dude is like, I know. Compare me to whoever the h*** you want. I know where I stand.
Cristina: Oh, okay.
Jack: Not. I'm not the best. What the f*** you get compared with people.
Cristina: Probably a young kid. Teen. Whatever.
Jack: What a loser.
Cristina: Ah.
Jack: You suck, bro. Why are you listening to this show? Why would you send. Dear God.
Cristina: So what should they do? Shut the up.
Jack: Keep this to themselves. The.
Cristina: Don't say anything.
Jack: Don't say anything. This is so dumb, dude.
Cristina: Die with the secret.
Jack: Yeah. Get over yourself.
Cristina: Your feelings. No, I don't.
Jack: Get over yourself. That's all you got to do. Just get over yourself. Yeah, the f***.
Cristina: Can't be the best at everything.
Jack: You've been clearly not the best at sex, especially with the mentality if. Oh, my God. If you're going into it already believing you're the best and you got nowhere else to go, which is how you became not the best.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: Because you thought, well, I maxed out. I don't have to get better. I'm already the best.
Cristina: I don't have to get better because you were having sex. I don't understand. It had to be because she said it maybe, right?
Jack: No, bro, it's just. Here's a problem. What guy doesn't think he's the best pipe for whatever chick, you know? That's the problem. I'm gonna be the f****** best. I got the biggest, best d***, and I know how to use it the best. And I'm the smell. It's like. No, you f****** don't, bro. Just like three of you out there, and you ain't one of them.
Cristina: Yeah, okay. Yes. So just get over yourself. Yeah.
Jack: Ridiculous.
Cristina: Ridiculous. The next question is, I found out my girlfriend has been cheating on me with someone who has a wife and daughter. Should I tell the wife?
Jack: Opportunities opportunate cheating. I love cheating. Not that I love cheating, but I love when cheating happens.
Cristina: You love people. Cheaters getting caught.
Jack: I love cheaters getting caught. Oh, God. I love cheaters getting caught. And I love structuring things so that they get caught. So. Good. Because the best thing, like, it's eventually gonna come out.
Cristina: Mm.
Jack: There's no covering it up, dude. You're two humans. You're gonna f*** up somewhere. There's. It's impossible. Everybody gets caught.
Cristina: Yeah. So it should be like the other situation. You don't tell them.
Jack: No.
Cristina: Never tell them.
Jack: But no, no, this is different.
Cristina: Come up with something.
Jack: This is different. Because it's his wife.
Cristina: It's his wife.
Jack: Wait, I've been. My girlfriend has been cheating on me with someone who has a white wife.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: So, yeah. Oh, God, this is so good. Okay. Yeah, yeah. You don't tell your girlfriend and you don't tell the husband. You go specifically to the wife. You. You find the proof. I don't know how you find the proof, but you find the proof.
Cristina: Whatever proof you had.
Jack: Yes. You take it to the wife with a single, single suggestion, and you're like, let's record ourselves f****** you and me. To get back at those two cheating pieces of s***. They already did it. This is just payback at this point.
Cristina: Mm.
Jack: So we're just gonna f***, and then we're gonna leave the video somewhere for them to find that. And when they do, you make sure also included in that video is whatever proof you have that. That they were doing it. So the first thing they see is outrage. Oh, my God. You cheating. Blah, blah, blah. And as it rolls and rolls and eventually enters the section where they're at.
Cristina: Yes. Like, maybe it's a video of them that they accidentally left somewhere. I don't know why.
Jack: You know, it could be just photos. It doesn't matter what it Is.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: You structured in such a way that.
Cristina: The proof that if it's photos, you gotta blow them out and have them posted all over the room while you're having sex so they can see it.
Jack: Yes.
Cristina: They'll have close ups, of course, in the end of the photos.
Jack: I like that. I like that a lot. There's, there's, oh, there's so many ways you could go, oh, I love cheaters. Oh, so good. They just open doors for like Rue Goberg.
Cristina: Mental traps, weird experiments.
Jack: Yeah. Like a domino effect of things. This triggers. That triggers this and this does this to that thing over there. And then this does this to them and they get angry and then this triggers the animal. Before you know it, they're like, well, I don't know what the happened, but I f***** up. And it's like, oh, if you structured that, they get angry first and then the proof that they did it first shows up. This the craziest trump card in the world.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: Because they're gonna, they're gonna try to flip it always. They're gonna, well, you cheated. They know they cheated, but they don't know you know they cheated. And so they're gonna, you cheated. Blah, blah, blah. They think it's their way out right now it's like, oh, I'm a leave you. And then that one part where it's like, no, I left you.
Cristina: Oh, yes.
Jack: Oh, God, so good. I'm about to choose. Not so good. It's awesome. I love it.
Cristina: So crazy.
Jack: Yeah.
Cristina: Should save that for your like, anniversary or something.
Jack: Oh, my God, bro.
Cristina: It only makes sense if it's like coming up or something.
Jack: I know exactly how it needs to happen. Oh, God, the long game, bro. Yeah, the long game, dude. Go have passionate, romantic sex with this guy's wife, take her out to dinner, become really close, then somehow get her to agree to get him and his friends to hang out. Somehow manage to work in that they're friends, not sex buddies of any sort. So that you guys are family familiar now. And then you propose to your girlfriend and then you invite them to the wedding and then have the video play at the f****** weddings.
Cristina: But you're gonna actually waste your money on a.
Jack: Yes.
Cristina: Wedding.
Jack: So good.
Cristina: Whoa.
Jack: So good.
Cristina: Really inexpensive.
Jack: Oh, so good. I guess get her father to pay for the wedding.
Cristina: Ah, yes.
Jack: Oh my God, yes. Oh, God, her whole family's gonna hate her for y. Oh, so good. I actually saw a video of that on YouTube, by the way.
Cristina: Something exactly like that.
Jack: Yeah, dude took it all the way to the wedding. And then the only thing that played in the wedding was a video of her f****** some dude in the backseat of a car that he recorded. And then he walked away without interrupting them. Oh, my gosh, it was so good. Oh, do that. Then send us all the details so that we can promote it on the show.
Cristina: Yes. How? Like, not the video. You mean the video.
Jack: You can if you want to. We can link to it.
Cristina: Yeah, yeah, yeah, we can do that.
Jack: Who's canceling us? The f*** If. If everything else we've done hasn't gotten us canceled yet.
Cristina: Yeah, just let us know.
Jack: Yeah, whatever. Whatever, dude. Just show us. It's gonna be so good, and I'm all for it.
Cristina: Mm. The next question is, my girlfriend likes to post thirst traps. She has a different Instagram for this, and she never posts her face, but the pictures are extremely racy. She sometimes shares the comments that she receives on the page, and it's really. And it seemed to really make her happy sharing those comments with me. Is this a red flag?
Jack: No. I don't know why you'd think it is. She shares it with you and talks to you about it.
Cristina: You know everything about it.
Jack: Yeah.
Cristina: I don't know.
Jack: I'm not sure what you're asking.
Cristina: It's a red flag if you like.
Jack: I mean. Yeah, that's the question. Is this a red flag at this point? Define red flag, dude. Like, what? She shows you she's cool. Showing you she trusts you. She. It's. It's a third. She's. I don't. I don't understand. I don't get it. She's not hiding anything. She's telling you specifically.
Cristina: It makes her happy, and it makes her happy.
Jack: She's not anybody. She's telling you specifically.
Cristina: Yes. And, you know, she's not showing her picture. She's not.
Jack: She's not showing her face. You know, there's no interaction happening with these people. Really? She shows you every bit of everything. I don't get. You don't like her showing herself. Is. That's a problem? You should have said that, bro. If that's a problem, you should have said that. You know, I don't like when she shows herself, in which case, okay, now we got a problem. But, like, well, she's honest to me about what she likes, and she shares with me what she does, so she's totally transparent, and she enjoys sharing that with me. So we have a moment between just the two of us. Is this dangerous red flag? Should I be worried about her honesty that you have the Most honest f****** girl, period. I don't. Don't get what you're asking.
Cristina: You're a red flag.
Jack: You're a red flag. She should be worried that you're questioning weird, random s***.
Cristina: Yeah. You're not being honest with her that this makes you. I don't even know what makes you feel uncomfortable.
Jack: I don't know. Does this make her feel uncomfortable?
Cristina: I'm assuming it makes him feel uncomfortable. I don't know.
Jack: He didn't specify.
Cristina: He's just worried that this might mean something worse, I guess. But, like, what could that worst be?
Jack: What do you not know about this that you're questioning? That we. That was included in this question?
Cristina: Like, they think maybe she's gonna cheat. But, like, you.
Jack: You see the whole thing.
Cristina: You. Yes.
Jack: You're gonna. Oh, she's about to cheat. I can see it in the conversation. She's showing me the f***. I don't get it, bro. She's like, hey, babe, I'm gonna f*** this guy. Look in the text. Then this is something you guys are agreeing to, essentially. I don't f****** know what's happening here.
Cristina: Yeah. If it gets to that point, you just say no. You don't do that. I don't know. Yeah, Like, I don't think it's gonna get to that point.
Jack: Thanks for sharing it with me, babe, but I don't think you should go f*** somebody else. Okay.
Cristina: Unless she's, like, in a whole different relationship that he's in. She thinks it's an open and we can do whatever we want.
Jack: I mean, is that the case? There's nothing specified in this question. I don't see what his problem is.
Cristina: There's no problem.
Jack: There's no problem.
Cristina: All right, dude, he wants her to show her beautiful face. I don't know.
Jack: We're skipping you, bro. There's no answer for you. Sort yourself out, man.
Cristina: Yeah, the funk. Next question is, my girlfriend looked through my phone. I'm curious. With everything between us that is going great, why would she just look through my phone? She claims she doesn't know why she did it, but I think she does and just doesn't want to tell me. Maybe she's just embarrassed by it. What are some reasons why a woman would look through her boyfriend's phone? Is it a trust but verify situation?
Jack: Interesting. She doesn't trust you. It's not trust but verify. That's not a f****** thing. No, because the trust is essentially fake. You are with trust. You are having faith that somebody is being honest. And because she didn't trust you, There is no faith. You don't. You don't need to verify trust.
Cristina: She's embarrassed because she knows she did something wrong.
Jack: She didn't trust you and found nothing.
Cristina: Mm.
Jack: That's the problem. Your girlfriend doesn't trust you. She thinks you're a liar. This being said, common psychology will tell you that we deflect as humans. It's possible she's the one whose phone needs to be gone through. Oh, because she already suspects something to be on the phone.
Cristina: Because she might have something on her phone.
Jack: Have something on her phone. Oh, she's like this cheating piece of s***. Because she's probably a cheating piece of s***. So go ahead, sit down, have the conversation, and say, just to be equal, just to be on equal footing. Now let me go through your phone.
Cristina: Yes. And if you find nothing, then you guys never touch each other's phones again.
Jack: Yeah, you guys are equal. But the moment you find something, and you will, I guarantee there's something on her phone. Unless you wiped it because she checked your phone. Now she's all suspicious. You're like, oh, he's gonna come and look at mine, but give it time.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: And then you bring it up and you're like, okay, you look through my phone. Now I'm going to. You wait. It's been a while. It's like, no, doesn't matter.
Cristina: Yes, surprise her.
Jack: Surprise her. You catch her out of the blue after a couple of days or weeks, and you just like, okay, let's have this conversation right now. You look through my phone. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. She tries to pull her phone. Pull her phone out and play with it. While you're having the conversation, you talk. No, put it away. We're talking.
Cristina: Because she's probably deleting.
Jack: She's probably already concluding where this is headed. So you get her to put it away. You have the conversation, and you're like, let me go through your phone. This is the only way this is gonna be equal. Because I don't know why you did it in the first place. If you trust me so much.
Cristina: Yes. And if she. I don't know.
Jack: If she says no.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: If she. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. You know, she gets hostile. If she gets aggressive. Oh, no, you're not gonna. You don't trust me. Well, you know.
Cristina: You know. Yeah. You don't have to look to know.
Jack: Exactly. You don't have to look to know.
Cristina: Yes, there should be.
Jack: If she. Look, if she really had. If she really did trust you and she thought something was happening, why doesn't she just ask if you're trustworthy and she truly believes you're trustworthy? The conclusion should be you're gonna answer the question truthfully.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: She did not go there. She just went to your phone. She does not believe she could trust you.
Cristina: Nope.
Jack: Until she saw there was nothing there and now she's.
Cristina: Yeah, like that's the only way, that song. Like she would have asked if she really trusted you.
Jack: Yeah, she just doesn't trust you.
Cristina: She doesn't.
Jack: That should be the clean cut path. You don't have to invade somebody's privacy. Just ask a question. You'll find out.
Cristina: Yeah, I don't know. What else did he ask? Oh, yeah, some reasons, I guess. That's it. That's the only reason. There's not many reasons. There's not like she's looking for a number or something. I don't know. She would have just asked any reason. She would have had to look through his phone. Yep. So there you go.
Jack: There you go. So catch her off guard and look at her phone in a couple of days or weeks after she has gone back to her normal routine.
Cristina: Interesting. Wonder what he'll find.
Jack: Yeah, maybe f****** come back and let us know you what you come across, little buddy.
Cristina: The next question is. I saw my mom cheating on my dad with one of her co workers. My mom told me not to tell my dad because it's. Because it would result in them getting a divorce. I don't want them to get a divorce, but I also feel bad for lying to my dad. So should I tell him the truth?
Jack: Yes.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: That's f*****. I want my dad. I don't want my parents to get divorced. Even if it means your dad is cheated on for all of eternity?
Cristina: That's really greedy of you.
Jack: Yeah, well, my family can't fall apart. But like their personal situation, whatever. Like, get the f*** out of here. Dude, be a better human.
Cristina: They're already falling apart.
Jack: Yeah.
Cristina: The fact that she's a child though, asking. I don't know why a child would be asking.
Jack: But like, if this is a child, just stop listening.
Cristina: Don't listen to your mom.
Jack: Don't listen to us.
Cristina: Don't listen to us.
Jack: You shouldn't be having access to this show if you are a child.
Cristina: But also your mom is horrible for telling you this. Your mom sucks. If they get a divorce. It's not your fault. It's your mom's.
Jack: It's your mom's fault. This is all your mom's fault.
Cristina: Don't protect your mom.
Jack: Yeah, don't protect your mom. She's horrible.
Cristina: She's horrible. I guess.
Jack: Tell your dad flat out, I saw mom cheating.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: That's it. That's all you gotta do.
Cristina: That's so crazy. How would she tell you? That's just. That's just a horrible person. Yeah. Who tells you if we. If you tell him, we'll get a divorce. You don't want that, right?
Jack: It's gonna be your fault we get divorced. Get the f*** out of here, bro.
Cristina: Horrible mom. I don't care. That's horrible.
Jack: Cheating and then wants to throw the blame on the kid. Get the h*** out of here.
Cristina: What? She's a monster.
Jack: Okay, but, like, is this a kid? It's not a kid. This is just a grown a** person who saw this happen. And then their mom was like, no, no, he's not a kid.
Cristina: Even if it's not a kid, his mom is still horrible.
Jack: Yeah, but he's. He's not. He's not a kid. He's not gonna think it's his fault. Yeah, this is my point. Like, it's not gonna think it's his fault. So just f****** tell your dad, bro.
Cristina: Yeah. You'll live through their divorce. Like, it's not gonna kill you. It's not. It doesn't affect you.
Jack: It doesn't affect anybody. They're already. If she's already cheating, then she already doesn't give a s*** what their f****** living condition is gonna change.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: The f***. That's all that matters. Well, I'm gonna have to see them at two different houses instead of one. Like, okay, so sweet.
Cristina: Like, who are you? Yes. Don't protect her or yourself if you're protecting yourself. I don't know. Because you want two married parents. Like, who cares?
Jack: Who gives a s***? Marriage is so arbitrary and stupid anyways.
Cristina: You'll still have two parents.
Jack: As you would know if you tuned in to the previous episode, 41% of all marriages in the world end up in divorce.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: So, like, assume this was coming anyways. She was eventually going to get caught and they would get the. You're speeding up the process and saving your dad cheating time.
Cristina: Mm. You saw it. You have the proof. Well, you have the memory of the proof, I guess.
Jack: Yeah, just go ahead. He probably has a suspicion.
Cristina: Yeah, like, he probably knows you. Just confirming.
Jack: Yeah, he probably didn't leave because he'd know for sure. Maybe I'm just paranoid. And then you show up, Daddy, she was cheating. I'm like, oh, yeah, yeah.
Cristina: Do the right thing.
Jack: Do the right thing. Yeah. Tattle crazy. The h*** kind of a. His mom sucks.
Cristina: Or should he tell because you gave everyone else not to tell, but all these other weird plans because it's none of their business.
Jack: This is your dad, bro.
Cristina: Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is very personal.
Jack: Yeah. This is your parents. This is a whole other issue.
Cristina: Yeah, you should tell.
Jack: Be a good son. Not the son of whatever s***** mom you have. It would be f****** crazy, right? If he tells his dad and then his dad is like, oh, thank God she's cheating, because I've been cheating for, like, 10 years.
Cristina: Oh, my gosh. How life changing would that be? Like, they're not gonna get a divorce at least.
Jack: No, they're just.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: They're just like, hey, we've both been doing this s***. Let's just keep it rolling then.
Cristina: Yeah. They'll probably never talk about it. It's just something they both live with. Like they were already living with.
Jack: Yeah. Now they just know what's happening, and they're like, okay, great.
Cristina: Okay. Yep. Yeah.
Jack: Yeah. Just became a de facto.
Cristina: You learn more about your parents.
Jack: Yeah. Yeah. Well, just to be real, two different people, like, right. That would just happen by default. If you're both cheating on each other, but you were both staying with each other because you love each other, finding out that you're both cheating is sort of a good thing because then you're like, well, we can continue loving each other, but be open. That's the only real time that cheating is a good thing. Because you both. If they both come out at the same time. Right. If it's like, oh, well, we're both cheating. God, that weight lifted off. Yes, I love you, but I want to f*** other people. Perfect sense.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: Then they could keep doing that, be together, live together, share their lives. But you get the f*** out of this, they get to f*** each other, too. Did at no moment that they stopped that we don't know.
Cristina: But they ever were doing that. I don't know.
Jack: Yeah. It doesn't matter because they're probably still f****** each other, too. It's fine. But they're f****** other people, which is what they were already doing in the background.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: F****** genius. So if your dad tells you he was already cheating, bam, you win. And if he says he wasn't, then you saved the good guy from a horrible woman.
Cristina: Yep. The next question is, my friend and my boyfriend are getting too close for comfort. How can I find out if it's something I should be worried about?
Jack: You trust them and don't bother because it's your Boyfriend and your best friend. What greater scenario than your boyfriend and your best friend getting along? Getting along ridiculously well so that you can spend time with both your boyfriend and your best friend uncompromised?
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: And then what everybody wishes would happen literally happened to you, and you're like, I don't like it. You probably introduced them to each other hoping that this would happen, and it.
Cristina: And it did, and now you're like, nope.
Jack: Yeah. Now you're like, oh, it's so. They're so close. Assume they're just really close friends.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: If you think there's something going on, but you got nothing to confirm it with, then it's in your head.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: Even if you. You know, it could be happening. But what do you. Where do you stand? Are you. Are you the person who trusts somebody or you don't? If you don't trust them, break up with them. You don't need an answer because you already have doubt the fact that you don't trust them. There is no love. You don't need to be with your boyfriend, so he.
Cristina: They don't need to ask.
Jack: No, this is. This is a simple solution. If she believes something more might be happening, break up with him. Don't ask. Don't question it. Because if it's not true, then you were trust. You were failing to trust them when he was doing absolutely nothing and she was doing absolutely nothing. So right now, your move is you cut your friend out and leave your boyfriend or get the f*** over yourself. One of those two roads. Because again, if they are cheating and you cut them both out, you saved yourself trouble.
Cristina: Mm.
Jack: If they aren't cheating and you cut them both out, you were already not trusting either one of them. Your s***** friend and a s***** girlfriend.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: Because they weren't doing anything and you were already suspicious of something that wasn't happening.
Cristina: That's. So. Yeah. Yeah.
Jack: So regardless of the scenario, if you believe something's going on, cut them off. Don't ask. Because either you're a s***** person where.
Cristina: Something'S happening and she should just leave.
Jack: A certain thing and you should just leave.
Cristina: Yeah. Like there's no simple way around it. Yeah.
Jack: Easy. This is easy. Easiest question. Easiest question. Just leave. If you really believe, don't ask. If you ask, you are a weak, pathetic human being, you sad little worm, you. But if you just leave, you just man the up and leave. Even if you woman man the f*** up. Misogynistic lines right there. But, yeah, just suck it up. Be like, f*** you.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: And f*** you. And I'm out.
Cristina: Yeah, if you have no trust, what's. What's going on?
Jack: What's the point? You don't trust your friend and you don't try. Okay, let's say you trust your best friend fully. Then she's not gonna do anything with your boyfriend. If you don't trust your best friend fully, but you do trust your boyfriend fully, then again, we're back to the same thing. There's nothing to worry about because he's not gonna do anything. Yeah, but if you don't trust either one of them, leave, because, hey, maybe something's happening or you just suck as a person. Yeah, either way, get the f*** out of there. If you believe something is happening, don't ask. If you ask, you're pathetic.
Cristina: Mm. Leave.
Jack: Leave if you believe there's something happening.
Cristina: If yes.
Jack: If not, then stop thinking about it because it's pointless. You're wasting energy.
Cristina: Yes. Wow.
Jack: This is easy. Easy f****** solution.
Cristina: The next question is, my wife wants a divorce, but I don't. Do I just let this happen and leave her alone, or do I try and fight for her back? I want to fight so hard, but my fear is that I'm going to push her farther away and make her hate me.
Jack: Okay, what was the question, though? Like, do you try to get her back? No, dude, that's ridiculous. If she already wants to get a divorce, she already feels enough of a disconnect. It doesn't matter what you feel.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: Let her live her life. Don't guilt trip her into staying. Don't try to make her feel bad. Don't throw yourself a pity party so she feels bad. Don't try to f****** weasel around and make put her in a circumstance where leaving is inconvenient. She wants to leave and divorce you, dude. Let her do it.
Cristina: Find someone else.
Jack: Find someone else. This is highly inappropriate. That people believe. No, I'm a fight for. No, no. They want to leave.
Cristina: They want to leave.
Jack: Let them. Yeah, it's not your job to convince anyone of anything. That means you don't like who she is now. You like who you can force her mind into becoming. Get the f*** out of here, bro.
Cristina: Mm.
Jack: Stop being so selfish. Well, I love her, but she doesn't love me, so I'm a f****** talk her back into loving me.
Cristina: Like, no, I'm gonna trick her. I don't know.
Jack: Yeah, like, dude, no.
Cristina: You lost already.
Jack: Yeah, I don't know. Get the divorce. Keep moving forward. Life happens. Sometimes it sucks.
Cristina: Yeah, sometimes sucky things happen. Yeah, this is Just a sucky thing.
Jack: It's. Yeah. Life. Life is life, dude. Good times, bad times. Gotta take them all together. It is what it is.
Cristina: Yeah. Move on.
Jack: Move on. Yes. You can't. You cannot realistically try to force somebody else because you're the bad guy at that point. There's no bad guy. Right now she's trying to get a divorce. Maybe you did something. I f****** know. Maybe she did something she's ashamed of. Whatever the case might be, she doesn't want to be here anymore. Regardless of what that looks like. She doesn't want to be here anymore. It is not your job to convince anybody, to trick anybody, to force anybody. Let it be.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: Be an adult.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: Cope with your emotions. Walk away.
Cristina: Marry another person. Maybe. I don't know. Who cares? But move on.
Jack: Regardless of what it looks like.
Cristina: Yeah. Just move on.
Jack: Just move on. It's highly inappropriate for you to even question whether you're gonna. What should I do? Force them. But no. No, you should.
Cristina: They want to be alone. Leave them alone.
Jack: Not even alone. They just don't want to be with you.
Cristina: Yeah, I guess.
Jack: Let them not be with you.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: Simple.
Cristina: Ask her on a date when you guys are single.
Jack: Yeah. Start all over.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: Interesting. This is a pretty easy stream of questions that were left so we had the harder ones at the start.
Cristina: Well, these are so random.
Jack: Yeah.
Cristina: Who knew? The next question is, how do I tell my best friend that I don't want to hear about her love life? I know we'll never date, but that doesn't really change the fact that I have feelings for her. Am I being juvenile for not wanting to hear about this aspect of her life? And if not, how do I kindly tell her to stop mentioning this to me?
Jack: Just tell her you don't care.
Cristina: Just tell her you don't care. Yes.
Jack: This is weird because this isn't even really about a relationship.
Cristina: No.
Jack: I don't know how this question got through. This is. I hear. I hate hearing about somebody else talk about relationships. So you're not having a relationship problem. Basically, you just.
Cristina: It's a friendship relationship.
Jack: It's not romance.
Cristina: In their head, there's romance because they have feelings for her.
Jack: Oh, that's what's happening here?
Cristina: Yeah. They have feelings for their friend and that's why they don't like hearing about her love life.
Jack: Oh, just tell her you have feelings for her. The f***. Be transparent. Why are you keeping secrets from your friend?
Cristina: And if she rejects you, you're. You're not a good friend. I guess I Don't know. Like, why. Why is, like, she's telling you about her dating life. Probably because she only sees you as a friend.
Jack: Yeah. Yeah, you. You. She hasn't made a move on you. Or maybe you haven't made a move. Whatever. You got friend zoned. One way.
Cristina: Yes. You're in the friend zone.
Jack: And, like, she's feel. She feels comfortable telling you about her life. And then you. You're like, well, my emotions and I don't want to hear about your life. Then, yeah, you kind of being bad friends.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: She wants to tell you you're probably her best friend at this point. She wants to tell you, literally, our best friends.
Cristina: Okay, Best friends.
Jack: So she's actively doing best friend things and telling you about her life, and you're just being a douchey, crappy human.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: Don't tell her. You already suck. Get out of there.
Cristina: Get out of there.
Jack: Yeah, give her a f****** opportunity to have better friends than you.
Cristina: Oh, okay.
Jack: So either eat it or let her have better friends. But no, you don't deserve to say s*** because she's just being a friend.
Cristina: Yeah. She just wants you to be a friend.
Jack: Yeah. She's hoping you're as much of a best friend to her as she is. You.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: And you're not really pulling through.
Cristina: Nah. You're being a creep.
Jack: Yeah. Sit here and wait patiently. That's the problem, right? Because a lot of females have this thing where it's like, they'll have guy friends and they think, oh, no, but he's really my guy friend. There are those guys out there, but it's probably not your friend.
Cristina: That's probably not your friend.
Jack: Like, most guys are just waiting. It's a waiting game.
Cristina: Is it like a 50? 50?
Jack: Not even. Not even. It's like 99 to 1.
Cristina: The 1 is the actual friend.
Jack: Yeah, the one is the actual friend. Most women have never seen that guy.
Cristina: Oh, wow.
Jack: And it's easy to prove. You take your phone, you contact your best friend, and you just ask, hey, my boyfriend, whatever, just broke up and I'm. So you want to go f******. You want to do something fun? I guarantee you, you're not your best friend anymore. Your best friend, like, h***, yeah, let's do it.
Cristina: Oh.
Jack: No questions asked. They will throw that friendship in the trash just to f****** stick it in your holes instantly, without a second thought. Just like the friendship. Yes, you guys, I will throw this away just to f*** your holes.
Cristina: So just how much did you say? 1%.
Jack: 1% of all people. All guys.
Cristina: All guys.
Jack: And maybe that's. You don't know if maybe that's too generous.
Cristina: That's too generous.
Jack: I think that number is generous. I think I'm overdoing it.
Cristina: Oh, no. What? There's just no. No such thing as a male best friend.
Jack: No, there are. I just think it's way less than 1%.
Cristina: Okay. Less than 1%.
Jack: Yeah. It's highly. Highly unlikely.
Cristina: Wow.
Jack: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Cristina: I wonder if we can find our actual statistics about.
Jack: Would require people to be honest, which is impossible. Surveys are so, like, lenient towards whatever the question is anyways.
Cristina: Yeah, man, that's a sucky friend.
Jack: Yeah, for sure.
Cristina: The next question is, what should I do if I think my partner is in love with someone else?
Jack: Ask them if they are. Ask them if they are.
Cristina: Just ask them. Yeah.
Jack: Do you trust your partner? Then they should tell you.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: Trust and communication, that's all that matters. You know, relationship. You don't have either of those two things. Get out of the relationship. It's stupid, pointless and effortless and like, it's going nowhere.
Cristina: It's going nowhere already. If you already think that they're in love with someone else.
Jack: Yeah. Well, no, no, no. Here's the problem. Here's a problem. Here's the problem. Maybe he is.
Cristina: Mm.
Jack: Ask. Yeah, he could. The problem is the black and white mentality that has a lot of ignorance that people is programmed in the people. TV programs it in the people.
Cristina: What?
Jack: Why couldn't he be in love with two people at once?
Cristina: Mmm.
Jack: Why is that not possible? That does not compute in people's minds. And I don't know why. Nothing said anywhere that was impossible. In fact, I think it's incredibly likely and probably the most likely outcome.
Jack: So.
Cristina: I don't know. People just want to be the one.
Jack: But what? That's so unrealistic. You can control yourself and commit to one.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: And you can make that other person you're in love with your best friend if you want, and they would, and you're not if they made the call and you are truly a good friend, then you could be in love with somebody that you're not gonna f*** their holes at the drop of a hat. But you can still love more than one person. That's the unrealistic part.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: So maybe he does. That doesn't mean anything is happening.
Cristina: Yes, that's true. So then do you even ask, like, does it even matter?
Jack: Well, if you're asking, you're trusting. He's gonna tell you that you haven't violated anything.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: You have an inkling. You don't. You're not approaching it. Mean, okay, realistically, how do you feel about the situation?
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: And then if they're honest, then great. And if the answer is no, fantastic. You got whatever black and white mentality that was gonna happen.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: And if they're like, like, no matter.
Cristina: The answer, it doesn't really affect anything.
Jack: That depends on how that answer plays out. If he's like, yeah, and I've been f****** her this whole time.
Cristina: Oh, you know. Yes.
Jack: So like, it does matter. But if nothing is happening, then what is the problem? Yeah, let him be in love with whoever the f*** he wants to be in love. Is he in love with you? Is the question.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: And also. Also what? No, that doesn't matter either. Because depends on your dynamic. Is your dynamic based on love? Doesn't necessarily have to be. Some people just have arrangements that are entirely beneficial. I personally know of people who get together with other people for the sake of simply having children and having. Raising a family.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: And they are together. Yeah, but not really. They love different people, but they are together. Living together. The parents of one person.
Cristina: Yes, but there's honesty there.
Jack: There's honesty there. Communication and trust is all you really need. And anything works. Even if you don't understand each other. The effort to communicate shows that the trust is earned.
Cristina: Okay.
Jack: And like, sure, it depends on the dynamic first. Because obviously the question isn't, do they love you?
Cristina: No.
Jack: But like, is the dynamic, is the idea that he should be loving you and only you. If that's the case, then ask. And if it bothers you, then see your way out.
Cristina: Yeah, but it's really. Does it bother you?
Jack: Yeah. Does it bother you? Because if he is in love with somebody else, what if he's not doing anything about it? What if he can control himself and he just. He's also in love with you and he just stays with you and does only what he wants with you, then you're a bad person in judging him. When he has self control, honesty, communication, totally trustworthy, you're the problem. You're what's wrong here.
Cristina: You're only if you, like, turn it into something bad. Like if you're just asking out of curiosity, you get the answer and then that's it.
Jack: Yes, but if you have a problem with it and he's done nothing.
Cristina: Yes. Then yeah, you're a problem.
Jack: Well, it depends.
Cristina: Just a problem.
Jack: If it's only a problem, if you want him to only love you.
Cristina: Mm.
Jack: For whatever reason and you can't Cope with him loving somebody else, even if nothing else is happening.
Cristina: Yeah. Mmm.
Jack: At that moment. You're also not wrong. You could just leave if that makes you uncomfortable.
Cristina: Yeah. Yeah. There's so many. I guess there's so many outcomes that could happen, so you should just do it. Just ask.
Jack: Just ask.
Cristina: You just ask.
Jack: Find out when you cross the road, you know.
Cristina: Yeah. Because there's so many different things you can do about the situation if you find out he is in love with someone or he's not. Like. But you know.
Jack: Yeah. Respond to how you feel.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: Don't react either. Don't react.
Cristina: No.
Jack: Think about things. See how you feel about things. And if he's honest, he's not doing anything wrong and you're still uncomfortable, then it's a situation that you should see your way out of.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: And that will give you the answer. Pretty simple. It's not really, like, rocket science.
Cristina: Yeah. Awesome.
Jack: Fair enough.
Cristina: That feels like a good answer. Yeah.
Jack: Anyways, the rest of your f*****. We don't have time and there's a lot. So, like, sorry, guys.
Cristina: Sorry, guys.
Jack: Like, like we said at the beginning, break up with whoever. I don't care what the question is. The answer is break up.
Cristina: Yes, that was the answer. Okay.
Jack: That was. So that's the answer to all the other questions that are lingering. Break up. Up, move on, start over, or sustain the problem until a year from now.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: When Valentine's Day comes back and then.
Cristina: The love podcast come back.
Jack: Yes.
Cristina: That will. You are.
Jack: I forgot, we're a relationship.
Cristina: Relationship. Yes.
Jack: We give you advice on how to fix your. Your life, your relationship. Because we care. Because everything we do is for love.
Cristina: You didn't answer anything in a small voice.
Jack: I didn't. I totally forgot that was the thing. Anyways, if you guys like this episode, the lovely answers, we g. Cave. And you want more of that. There are four other episodes in which we answer your questions about love, life, romance, money, and murder.
Cristina: Murder.
Jack: Actually. Yeah. One of them was about a lady killing her husband or something.
Cristina: I don't remember that.
Jack: Yeah. The suggestion was she murdered him or something. Yeah. Like she cooked his rabbit or something. Because we saw a movie like that or some s***.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: Anyways. Yeah. So you know all that stuff. Murder and murder. Yeah. It's highly emotional. Roller coasters happen here.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: That's everything. Everything in our love podcasts. So, yeah, you can find all that stuff on the official website. Great thoughts.info on Apple podcast, Spotify, or anywhere you get your podcast.
Cristina: And you can reach us On Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and TikTok at just combo pod.
Jack: Yes. And remember to rate, review, subscribe all the things that have you interacting with us and go comment and like and everything on the socials and s***, bro.
Cristina: And let someone who might like this show know about it.
Jack: Yes, we probably answered questions that somebody in your life is having as a problem. Show it to everybody who's in a relationship and maybe apparently everybody. Anybody who has a best friend as well. If you have a best friend, show it. If you got f******. If you know people in relationships, show it to them because they neither.
Cristina: If there's a girl with a male friend, show it.
Jack: Yeah. Cuz here's the problem. All male friends apparently want to f*** all their female friends. Yeah, that's what we learned on this episode.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: Best friends who are guys are bullshit.
Cristina: They're dishonest.
Jack: Yeah. They're dishonest to crappy people.
Cristina: Yep.
Jack: Don't have a guy best friend. It's total bullshit. But yeah.
Cristina: And this has been the Rambling podcast. Take nothing personal and thanks for listening. Bye.
Jack: That's the silent hill sound like if you walking down a hallway that you clearly see nothing and there's nothing. It's an empty hallway and you still hear.
Cristina: A halt to town.
Jack: Okay, what? What the f***? Where is it? You see nothing and then it gets super quiet and you're like, okay, whatever's gone. And that's when something pops up.
Cristina: Is that town haunted?
Jack: I don't know. It's like a different realm or something.
Cristina: Yeah, but it happens when you cross the bridge. So is it just a haunted road and you never actually make it into the actual town?
Jack: I don't know. I don't know. And you never get out either.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: You're just there forever.
Cristina: Yeah. When you think you left, you're still there.
Jack: You're still there.
Cristina: But it all starts on the road into the town.
Jack: Does it? I don't remember.
Cristina: And when he tries to leave, there was no road to leave from.
Jack: I don't think it starts there. I think it starts after you've been in, after you hear the sirens. Oh, I think that's the first time. You can't be there for the siren. Once the siren goes off, you up.
Cristina: Okay.
Jack: And you'll never get out.
Cristina: Good morning. This podcast is hosted by Christina Colazo and Jack Thomas, produced by Lynn Taylor and published by Great Thoughts info art by Zero Lupo and logo by Seth McAllister with social media managed by Amber Black.
