I Let Go

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…life, bound by belief, held captive by ideals, imprisoned by guilt and fear; invariably trying to rectify the past, inevitably failing and bankrupting my future.

Longing for freedom, I let go of my self-bound chains. I breathe and see the present for the first time. the present, stagnant up to this point, vibrant, whirling, whispering to me, and I feel the quickening. I am overcome with a lust to be part of the brilliant matrix surrounding me, and, I let go...

By Tracey Koehler

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Soccer Moms Do It With Style

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A girls night out, interrupted

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…will never forget the look on his face as my husband, Ted, stared at me from the other side of a smudged plate of plexiglass. It was a mix of comical bewilderment and admiration. I wiped the tears from my mascara smeared eyes, picked up the phone, and started at the beginning.

It was Soccer Club Night. No, I didn’t play soccer, I was part of a group of women who fit the “Soccer Mom” profile to a tee. Dedicated mothers, members of the PTA, and tenaciously driven to raise the perfect family. We…

By Tracey Koehler

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On Time

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…is indefinite, a sequence of continuous events from the past, within the present, and of the future to come.

Society has become fixated with the measurement and the scheduling of time, instead of directing their attention and energy to the sequence of events that are, in essence, their livelihood.

How wonderful life would be if we concentrated on the events that need to occur, rather that the twirly cogs in the machine; to measure our…

By Tracey Koehler

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Once Upon A Time

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…suppose I did have that “once upon a time” moment in my life, but I watched helplessly as I let it slip through my fingers; forever lost to me. I spend my days in darkness, regret, my only companion, slowly losing hope. I am the monster hiding under my bed, slowly snuffing out the last of my dreams. I have but the dimmest spark left in my cold soul, and I wonder, as I sit in silence, will it be…

By Tracey Koehler

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Voices

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…they won’t leave me alone,

Voices from long past and still they roam.

They tell me my downfalls, my mistakes, and regrets,

All of this way to much to bear in one’s head.


I open my mouth and let them all out,

A pure primal scream, the echo rings throughout.


I through back my head, feeling empty inside.

I pushed them all out, left no place to hide.

When in the emptiness, a small voice arose.

It was hard to recognize the voice as my own.


As tears streamed down my cheeks, for the very first time.

My mind filled….

By Tracey Koehler

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The Abyss

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…slate-like under my bare feet; cold, slick, impenetrable. The air is stale and clammy. My hands blindly lunge into obscurity; nothing within grasp, only the vacuum of the dark barren. The cold emanates from within my soul and spreads through the fibers of my nerves, embracing every inch of my body. I call out; my voice falling flat, no walls to echo my shout. I shiver, not knowing if this is from the chilling dankness or my own fear and fall to the ground.

Sobbing, I crawl through the misty darkness for hours. The floor is slick from the dewy…

By Tracey Koehler

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Let Sleeping Demons Lie

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…heart races as I toss, turn, and kick away another night. If I do manage to fall asleep, the nightmare begins.

An invisible demon, throws me about. The pain so real, I think I may die. I know it is a dream, but I cannot wake. I try to run, every muscle straining as if I am weighed down. I try to scream; silent breath only escaping my lips. I think I wake, only to feel the invisible demon attack again, and I realize I am still dreaming.

So scared.

What if I never wake?

Repeating over and over until…

By Tracey Koehler

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