Rambling 173: More Men Religion
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Are there countries where it’s legal to marry more than one person? Why is it illegal in so many? Who decided this? And can mormons legally do it in the United States where it’s illegal? The duo unpacks the reason polygamy is frowned upon and in doing so uncover truths never before conceived by mortals.
+Episode Details
Topics Discussed:
- Netflix Ads
- Mormonism
- Polygamy
- Hell
- Prey vs Meditation
- The point of religion
- Vampire Jesus
- Fruit of Life
- What’s blood did Jesus drink?
- Fairies
Our Links:
Official Website - https://greythoughts.info/podcast
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+Transcript
Cristina: This program contains strong themes meant for a mature audience. Discretion is advised.
Jack: Going live in 5, 4.
Cristina: What does live mean? Welcome to the Rambling podcast. The show where we ground humanity's most absurd and baffling ideas in childish ways. I'm your host, Christina.
Jack: And I'm Jack.
Cristina: And if you haven't yet, remember to hit that subscribe button to get notified the second new episodes are released.
Jack: Yes. And remember, this show is most enjoyable with listening partner. That's my new radio voice.
Cristina: What?
Jack: Everybody's gonna love it.
Cristina: I don't think so.
Jack: Oh, man. Stole this. This. Z1000.
Cristina: Z1000 tuna.
Jack: Z1000. I mean, that decimal point is an accident, right? Z1003. The radio station.
Cristina: Are you supposed to sound like something? It does not sound like a radio.
Jack: Like a radio. No, it's Z100. I guess that's more accurate.
Cristina: Yes. Yours is like. It's melting. I don't know.
Jack: Z100. Only two minute commercials. That's our promise.
Cristina: Every station has that promise.
Jack: Every f****** station. Without fail. Z100, where we play the. The what? The graded the hit to current hits. What do they say the station for the best hits? No, there's a. There's a thing.
Cristina: There's a thing. Yes.
Jack: It has like a line that's like the. You know, the.
Cristina: We played three songs before a commercial.
Jack: Yeah, the new all. Yeah, it's like there's only two minutes of commercial before music. And it's like you play one song and then two minutes of commercial and then you play another song and then two minutes of commercial. But they didn't lie.
Cristina: But they didn't lie.
Jack: They didn't lie. Only two minutes of commercials.
Cristina: Once they put commercials inside songs, that would be amazing.
Jack: Yeah, it's gonna get there.
Cristina: It's gonna get there.
Jack: It's just a matter of like, you know, we're gonna play. You're gonna listen to your music and you're only gonna get two minutes of commercials. And they don't tell you that those two minutes of commercials are happening during the song. It's basically just the radio version of the. The hood DJ who swears he's good at his job and he just plugs in an ipod and then talks over everybody's favorite song.
Cristina: It's awful.
Jack: That's what radio is going to be.
Cristina: It's going to be commercials with songs in between them.
Jack: Dude. No, because what's going to happen is a natural evolution of music. And the natural evolution of music is going to be all songs are going to be jingles for commercials.
Cristina: Oh, so there's not going to be any real songs?
Jack: There's no real. I mean, yes. You just got to get them through commercials. You can only hear songs if they're advertised to you.
Cristina: Oh.
Jack: Oh, that's awful.
Cristina: That's so awful.
Jack: But that's gonna. This is future.
Cristina: Everything is commercials.
Jack: Everything is commercials. We're so close. What doesn't give you ads? Tell me one thing you use that's ad free. Unless you're paying.
Cristina: I'm hoping Netflix doesn't give me ads.
Jack: So far, Netflix can't give you ads. You're paying.
Cristina: But if they decide to do that, well, it's awful.
Jack: Well, no, no, no. Here's a trick, right? Here's the reality of the matter for Netflix. I didn't think about this before, but I thought about it right now because thinking is a thing that happens, and.
Cristina: Thoughts occur, and it happens randomly.
Jack: Happens randomly. Sometimes. Sometimes I get. I get these headaches with pictures and ideas. Dude, I think you're thinking it's kelso from that 70s. I get these headaches with pictures.
Cristina: Whoa. He thinks rare.
Jack: Yeah. And hides life. That's a thought.
Cristina: Oh, my gosh.
Jack: Yeah. Yeah. But it makes sense for Netflix to be free because they'll make the most money that way if they put commercials for people. So you don't let people share, you know, only one f****** thing at a time. But Hole, you can definitely throw ads at the people who don't want to pay. And they'll still watch it because the content is still there.
Cristina: Okay. Like everything else, it sucks.
Jack: Why does it suck?
Cristina: I don't want commercials.
Jack: You won't get commercials if you're already paying.
Cristina: That's true.
Jack: Do you have Netflix?
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: Then you will have no commercials.
Cristina: That's true.
Jack: Commercials is for everyone else. Anybody who doesn't already have Netflix. And think about how often a Netflix phenomenon happens. This doesn't happen anywhere else. The bird cage. No, that was a long. The bird box. The bird box. The Tiger King.
Cristina: Squid games.
Jack: Squid games. Oh, yeah, there's a cup.
Cristina: There's a couple of things that become.
Jack: Global phenomenons, and Netflix is responsible for catering those things. Like my soothing voice.
Cristina: Yes. It's beautiful.
Jack: Yes. Netflix is responsible for soothe. For soothing. For soothing Netflix. Netflix is responsible for providing these programs to create cultural and global sensations.
Cristina: I'm sure Disney is doing that too. I'm just not watching any of Disney's things.
Jack: It's not. To the not, people aren't going crazy the way they did with, like, Tiger King. People Are going Bird box. Who the f*** didn't hear about that movie?
Cristina: Didn't see a meme about that movie.
Jack: Yeah. You get my point. Like, there's no comparison. If you just this. I know there's more. I just can't remember them off the top of my head. But the Bird Box, Tiger King and Squid Games. What thing has any other company done, period, media wise, that you can think of that is more known than one of those three things? And we're talking like, Star wars is a f****** thing that's on Disney.
Cristina: Mm. Still, you don't think.
Jack: Still not competing with how like, this s*** took over the world. It can't compete with any of those three. You already have to like Star Wars.
Cristina: A lot of people seem to like Star Wars.
Jack: Not more people than have seen the Bird Box.
Cristina: Oh, okay.
Jack: People just watch that because of how many memes were about. I'm like, s***, I guess I gotta watch it.
Cristina: Yeah. It's crazy. Because of a meme or memes.
Jack: Same thing with Squid Games. Like, s***, we. I guess we gotta watch it.
Cristina: Oh yeah. There's so many of the old man.
Jack: Yeah. Squid Games is overpowered, man.
Cristina: Mm.
Jack: And the Tiger King as well. That's a whole f****** thing on s***. Bunch of shows about tight. Like.
Cristina: Like spin offs.
Jack: Yes. Spin offs everywhere. Everybody's trying to bank on this s***.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: They're like, that was too big. We all need to f***. We need to do it. And now Peacock has a f****** drama that add the dramedy. That actually looks good.
Cristina: It does look good.
Jack: And then there's the. The Netflix spin off about the other person who is somehow connected. But it's Tiger King. It has nothing to do with Tiger King. But it's a different person who's going through some different thing. It's like, what the.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: Whoa.
Cristina: The Tiger King universe.
Jack: Yeah.
Cristina: Universe.
Jack: The tiger verse.
Cristina: Tiger verse.
Jack: The tiger verse.
Cristina: Yep.
Jack: But yeah, so it makes sense that they could make commercials for people who get it for free and they would make a f*** ton of money because people want to watch certain things. You could put super bowl quality commercials on Netflix and get. Netflix would bank hard as f***. Because the eyes that are gonna be on those commercials because people just want to see the thing that's a f****** global phenomenon.
Cristina: I guess that works out.
Jack: Yeah. There's nothing competing with this s***.
Cristina: Mm.
Jack: There's. I couldn't even tell you of one thing. Like the closest actually. Right. Is not even Loki. It's the other show, Wandavision by Disney. Like, that's the Clue. And it's not even again. It's people who are already into Marvel that are just really talking about it.
Cristina: Yeah. You don't think there's people outside of Marvel?
Jack: Obviously there are. It's not like a hundred percent, but it's not like a huge number. Like, how many memes about WandaVision? Have you seen one? Maybe. Have you ever.
Cristina: I think so. Of Wanda herself. I think it could have been from.
Jack: Just any other thing.
Cristina: Oh, yeah. It could be just Marvel f****** Avengers movie. It could be. Yeah.
Jack: And that's maybe the most notable thing. People hated the f****** Star wars movies that came out the last three or whatever. F***. There's nothing. There's nothing competing.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: And like, think about how crazy of a global thing Marvel is as a whole. Think about nuts Spider man is. People f****** love Tom Holland. And still. Does anybody make noise about any of this the way they did? Like Squid games? You could easily evade Spider Man. Could you evade Squid games? Is that a f****** thing? Tiger King. Have you seen Tiger King?
Cristina: No.
Jack: Have you been able to avoid Tiger King, though?
Cristina: No.
Jack: Exactly.
Cristina: I know everything that happens. A lot of things that happen.
Jack: You know the entire story of Tiger King without seeing Tiger King? Because everybody talked about Tiger King.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: In pieces. You got the full story?
Cristina: I think so. It'll be shocking if I do watch it. What things they didn't talk about?
Jack: Yeah. It's probably mundane s*** because we know Carol Baskin. Ever seen Tiger King? I know Carole Baskin probably killed her husband.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: According to the people who watched it. And Tiger King was a dude who had many husbands or boyfriends and had tigers. But so did Carole Baskin. But she didn't want him to have them.
Cristina: But he didn't care because he was breaking the rules. Like he had too many or something. And she said, I guess she supposedly was following the rules of her.
Jack: Wasn't either. Oh, she was claiming she was and he wasn't, but she apparently wasn't either. And it's like, okay. And she might have murdered her husband.
Cristina: Yes. But what's he involved in that? Did she try to hire him to murder her husband or did she try to also hire someone to murder him?
Jack: No, no. She's just his rival for tigers.
Cristina: Oh. And that's it.
Jack: Oh, based on my understanding.
Cristina: Yeah. Yeah.
Jack: I don't think she wanted him to.
Cristina: Kill her husband or get him killed after killing her husband.
Jack: No, I don't think he was. She was trying to get him killed.
Cristina: Okay.
Jack: I think she just wanted him to not have cats. And he was Like, I love cats, I love p******, but not vaginas because I suck d***. But he does a couple at a time. Actually, he sucks many dicks and he's illegally married to many men.
Cristina: Illegally? You said legally illegally. Okay.
Jack: Yes, because it's illegal.
Cristina: Okay.
Jack: There's. There's no way he could legally be married to many men in the United States.
Cristina: No.
Jack: Unless you're Mormon. And still.
Cristina: No, that's still not legal.
Jack: Isn't that why Romney moved to Mexico?
Cristina: Who's Romney?
Jack: Mitt Romney. Oh, move to Mexico so he can marry several women or some s***.
Cristina: Really?
Jack: I think so.
Cristina: Is this a rumor? Is this a conspiracy or urbanization?
Jack: No, no. I remember hearing this in the radio or some s***. I don't know if it's true or not. It could have just been like a radio station host making a joke. Yeah, but I don't know. Mitt Romney moved to Mexico. But is it legal in Mexico to marry multiple women?
Cristina: Don't think. Where is it? Do you think there are countries where it's legal to marry multiple people?
Jack: H***, yes. For sure.
Cristina: Really?
Jack: Yes.
Cristina: I don't know.
Jack: It's not even arguable.
Cristina: Like, what country?
Jack: I don't know. I know that it's a thing.
Cristina: You don't know where, though?
Jack: No, I know that it's a thing, but I don't know where. Like, I. I'm 100% sure.
Cristina: Legal.
Jack: Yes.
Cristina: Not that people. Just.
Jack: 100%, no questions asked. Okay. We just looked it up. There you go.
Cristina: Yes, there are some countries that are many legal.
Jack: Many countries upwards of 20, that it's just legal.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: Yes.
Cristina: But there's a lot that's. It's illegal, but people are still doing it.
Jack: Yeah.
Cristina: And there's some countries that they have minimums for some reason. Like you can't pass for steal all the women. Can't steal all the women.
Jack: Can't steal all the women. What? If you want to, the richest guy in the world could just keep marrying women.
Cristina: Why not?
Jack: Because it's illegal, is why not?
Cristina: Up to four or five. That's crazy.
Jack: Yeah.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: You can on average have up to four wives.
Cristina: That's weird, but. Okay.
Jack: I don't understand why it's weird though. Right?
Cristina: Because it's not common.
Jack: I mean, literal definition, but, like, why is it illegal in so many places?
Cristina: Because God said so. I'm guessing. I'm guessing that's the reason. I don't know.
Jack: Did God say so?
Cristina: I think so.
Jack: I don't think God said that.
Cristina: What?
Jack: I don't Think people made that part up?
Cristina: Are you sure?
Jack: Pretty positive. There you go. The Bible doesn't say s*** about having one.
Cristina: I guess that's your interpretation of it. Like, not like. It doesn't specifically say anything really. It just says, like, your wife. Like, you're assuming that he's talking about one wife, one husband and whatever.
Jack: But he never says, one wife and one husband only. He doesn't even say one.
Cristina: He's more concerned about divorcing.
Jack: Yeah. He's like, don't get divorced if you've made. If you married four b******, you stay with four b******, bruh.
Cristina: But it says you can't be. You can't live with another person until your other person dies. If that's one of them. Like that sort of.
Jack: No, no, no. That's also about marriage. It's like, you can't be with somebody who's not your husband if you have a husband.
Cristina: Okay, but like, if you have four husbands.
Jack: Four husbands, you know, then they all.
Cristina: Have to live in the same house, I guess.
Jack: Okay, well, no, because you're still at your husband's house.
Cristina: Okay?
Jack: Not violating the rule of you can't sleep in a bed that's not your husband's if you have a husband.
Cristina: Ah. So as long as it's one of your husbands, it's okay.
Jack: I guess this is the problem here.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: Like, he doesn't say, like, one to one and only one and no more than that.
Cristina: He's like, you have to be married.
Jack: You have to go get married.
Cristina: Anything more than that?
Jack: Yeah, no, people made that up. But why? But why? What the f***?
Cristina: I don't know. That's weird. I don't know.
Jack: That's my theory.
Cristina: You have a theory on this? Okay.
Jack: Guy. Guy logic. Right? Guy logic. Guy logic is I own you. I own. You're my f****** property. I'm the man. I'm. I got the p****, I got the d***, I got the balls. You belong to me. But, mm, Bob over there had the same idea. He's like, she. Her. The girl you talking to? No, that belongs to me. That's my prop. I'm a. I got the d***, I got the balls. This ball, everything is mine.
Cristina: Okay?
Jack: And it's like if it was Bob by himself, Bob would go to Jessica and Cindy and Miranda and he'd be like, you b****** are all mine. You b****** can't sleep with anybody. But you can't sleep with anybody you didn't marry. Tricked you, huh? You got follow that rule first. That's Dustin. That One's in the Bible.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: You can't f*** anybody then, Mary.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: And we can't have Bob marry everybody because then the rest of us don't got anybody to f***. So we're gonna say Bob could only marry one so that there's enough to go around so that you can own yours.
Cristina: A girl marrying multiple people is crazy.
Jack: Yes, exactly. Exactly. The guy can do whatever the f*** he wants.
Cristina: Ah, okay. Yes.
Jack: But not the female. But the whole one to one was still made up by the same people. Because we can't have Bob take all the women.
Cristina: Yes. Because he's obviously the winner.
Jack: Yeah. Bob, two alpha, bro. And I'm like, mega beta. I need to, like, make sure Bob. Yeah. This needs to be evened out. These odds are lopsided. All of them are going to run towards him. I want some coochie too, bro. Where's my cooter?
Cristina: Cooter.
Jack: Cooter, exactly.
Cristina: You get cougars.
Jack: Cooch.
Cristina: Cooch, yeah.
Jack: Cougars. Cooch is a cooter. But yeah, it sounds right, doesn't it? The cooter.
Cristina: That does sound right. No, not that part. Well, yes, that also sounds right. But the first part also sounds right.
Jack: Right. It's totally guy logic. Because it's like, if it wasn't for Bob, I'd also be doing what Bob's doing and try to take them all. Because men.
Cristina: Because this is what we do.
Jack: I own everything around me because God said, I'm better than you. The end.
Cristina: That makes sense.
Jack: Exactly. And so we're gonna ride that train until we die. But Bob's were born. They were like, well, I can't f******. If it wasn't Bob, Steve the beta would be the most alpha in a room. And because of that, all the other men who Steve would join to make this rule against Bob, all those guys.
Cristina: Mm.
Jack: Made it to make the rule against Steve. Because whoever's the most alpha is still gonna be like, it's all mine and none of you a******* can do anything about it.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: Except that rule. That prevents me from doing it.
Cristina: Yeah. So it was just to even things out. Okay, that makes sense.
Jack: We don't want the king to f*** all the women. The king gets one.
Cristina: Mmm.
Jack: We'll call her the queen. F*** off, King.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: You know, it's that logic of, well, what about the rest of us?
Cristina: Yeah, I guess.
Jack: But, like, if we go old school, old days. Just kill you and you just. The rest of you saw me f****** kill. F****** Steve. I kill. I'm Bob. I'm f****** murdered Steve the Rest. You saw me f****** murder Steve. Who wants these women? F****** fight me for them, bro.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: And, like, that was the reality. And it's like too many of us are dying to Bob. Maybe we just say God said no, okay? And, like, Bob doesn't know how to read. He's too alpha. He's just. He's never picked up a book. Never pick up a book. He'll never know what's in that book. We're just gonna tell him what's in.
Cristina: That book and he's gonna listen.
Jack: Yeah, if you go to h***, you can be f***** by a bunch of dudes, bro. You don't want to go to h*** and be f***** by dudes. You super alpha, bro. You mega straight. You too straight for that. You so straight you can marry just one chick, bro. Yes, because it's gay to go to h*** and get f***** by guys. It's like, yeah, no, you right.
Cristina: Be so crazy if that was in the Bible and we didn't know that.
Jack: Extracted by the Christians, probably, but it's in the Jewish Bibles. All men get f***** by Mormon.
Cristina: Oh, my gosh.
Jack: Thus the Mormons are born.
Cristina: The Mormon.
Jack: All. All non believers are f***** by Mormon.
Cristina: No, no, no, no.
Jack: It's how it happened.
Cristina: That's how it happened.
Jack: That's how it happened. And then Mormonism happened.
Cristina: I don't think that's how it happened. I'm sure it had to do with.
Jack: No, think about it. Are Mormons allowed multiple wives?
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: Why?
Cristina: Well, no. I mean, once upon a time, yes.
Jack: I don't think now Mormons are allowed more wives. But think about it. Why are Mormons allowed multiple wives?
Cristina: They changed their thing because more men. Because more men.
Jack: That's the religion. We're mega straight. We f*** many women because they don't want to go to h*** and they're super straight. I ain't gay, bro. Bro ain't gay.
Cristina: So I do want to go to h***.
Jack: No, because it's legal. Well, the h*** stopped being a thing. Nobody believes in h*** anymore. Even the Mormons are just Mormon because they want to f*** many women. Because I'm. I'm hella straight, bro. I'm super straight, man. You know, that's Mormon. Somebody at some point said it. Somebody was like, well, man, you can't take all the women because you can go to h*** and then you're gonna be f***** by more men. Like, well, I need to start this religion where I do the opposite of get f***** by more men. I f*** more women and then die.
Cristina: To be f***** by more men.
Jack: No, because they realize h*** does not exist. But they also got to prove to everybody else I'm straight, bro. Okay, That's Mormon. That's the real history of Mormon. Don't Google it. Trust me.
Cristina: I don't think so. I'm pretty sure it was this old man who claimed I got talked to him when he was a young boy.
Jack: It was like, oh, stick your d*** in all the women. Nah, they want it. You can't say no. Force them. Force them, Bro, you're the chosen one. God gave you a p****. That p**** is to point at people. And when you point, you've picked them. And when you pick them, they just listen.
Cristina: And that's God.
Jack: No, that's that old man who listens to God.
Cristina: Oh.
Jack: But it's telling everybody else it's in the Bible because nobody's gonna look in.
Cristina: His version of the Bible.
Jack: In his version of the Bible, Everybody's. They know. See, here's the problem with that. Everyone's interpretation is their own.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: So there's no one version of the Bible. There's as many versions as there are people who've read the Bible.
Cristina: Oh, yes. Yes, there is. That's crazy. Yeah.
Jack: So it goes like this. There's the main book, right? There's the main book. And we'll say there's this f****** stories that went down through history. We had an episode about it, Proto Indo European mythology, the big blanket on top. Then that breaks down into many different things. The people who structured these stories into more cohesive narratives with lessons and morals and little tight ending in a neat beginning.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: Okay, then. So we call. You will say Judaism and Christianity and Islam and Hinduism and blah, blah, blah. And now within, we'll pick one. We'll say Christianity, because all these things are more or less the same. Well, so we just take things, take one. Because they're all going to break down the same way. So we got Christianity, Christianity. And in Christianity we got like Pentecostal and we got like Catholics and we got like a Jehovah's Witness.
Cristina: And they're all reading the same thing.
Jack: Yeah. So it's already different. This is first Proto Indo, Europeans. They're all reading the same thing. And that breaks down to these religions who are reading the same things. The Jews are reading the same thing as Christians. The Islams, it's Hindus, whatever. So now we just took one of the stories that they're all. Okay, so it's. Now everybody here's reading the same one book. Yeah, reading the same book.
Cristina: It's the same, but they're all interpreting it differently.
Jack: So the collect now we. Now we break it down to the groups of. Because before, it's like culture, like, what country were you born in is going to decide what religion most likely. This is the broad picture of what everybody in there kind of more or less follows. Okay, but then. So we got the country, right? So there's Earth, proto, Indo, European.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: The religions of the world. Then we pick a country in the world. No, we pick a continent. We pick a continent and we pick that continent. It's called Christianity.
Cristina: Okay?
Jack: And in that continent of Christianity, we're gonna pick a country. That country is Catholicism.
Cristina: Okay.
Jack: Catholicism we could have.
Cristina: But then in Catholicism, whatever. In Catholicism, that also breaks up.
Jack: Yeah, because we have Catholicism. But. Okay, so Catholics, we all agree that this is the right way to do the thing. Right? So we got. This is our country. Okay? Catholicism is a country, but there's many states inside the country. So you got the Roman Catholic and you got. What is that? The. The. The Greek. What is it called? The. What you. What do you call The Ortho Orthodox. Greek Orthodox. Yeah, yeah. There you go. So there's Greek Orthodox and there is.
Cristina: So this is Catholic variants, the ones that do magic.
Jack: Yeah, yeah. All these people got like the hobo walk around with a little chalice with smoke coming out, and he's performing, like, spells or whatever. I don't know. And then the kids come and sing and they pray or whatever. Also Catholics. Yes, yeah, all those people. But that's like Hispanic Catholics. But it's more or less the same. It's Wiccan. It's a Wiccan Catholic in Spanish.
Cristina: Okay, yeah.
Jack: So. Yeah. Okay, so we have. This is. We had our country of Catholicism, and then we picked our state of Greek Orthodox. Okay, so we got our state of Greek Orthodox. Now we're gonna look at that state. Only that state.
Cristina: Are you saying there's cities in that state?
Jack: There's cities in that f****** state. That's crazy. The state is divided. Mad lions everywhere. Because there's individual churches.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: Of the Greek Orthodox within every church. Maybe. You know, I went to this Greek Orthodox church and I didn't really like how he was presenting the things. I didn't really click with me, but I went to this other Greek Orthodox and it was resonating with me more. I like that church better. Oh, s***. So there was a difference between these two Greek Orthodox church. So. Cities. These two cities. Okay, so we're gonna pick the. The one on the left, not the One on the right. The one right with the one. All right, so I'm gonna go left. The one on the left. Mmm, I like that one. So that city. I like that city. But wait, cities got neighborhoods. What the f***? So there's neighborhoods now within this church. Why do people in church sometimes not like it? Well, Samantha over there, she's too risque.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: But Moran is kind of a prude.
Cristina: Mm, I hear that all the time.
Jack: I like to be in the middle. I'm casual, but I'm not slutty, you know? So they're individually interpreting.
Cristina: What's the right and wrong way anyway?
Jack: Right and wrong way to approach what the church told them. And the church is just following what the collective of the religion of that branch of that religion is doing. But that branch is only following the. The bigger overall of the world, the religion. And then that religion is just following the bigger overall of the text. And then that relate that text based conglomerate is fought. So you just follow it all back up. It just breaks down infinitely until you get to. Because Miranda and Samantha, and they're prudish or too risque, that goes down to their individual households. This is what I believe the right way is. And I'm gonna teach my kids this way.
Cristina: Yes. And you're just pointing out things in the Bible that agree with you more than you're actually looking at the Bible and seeing what it says.
Jack: Yes, 100%.
Cristina: Or you're pointing at what the priest is saying, but only the things that you like. You're like, yes, he's saying what I like. Because you're interpreting. Like, yes, he's talking about me. Which I've heard people talk, like, oh, I went to this session or whatever they're called. And like, he was talking about the thing that I was going through. Like, no, he picked a random story. And you related.
Jack: You related. Yeah, through the events resonated with you.
Cristina: Yes. But to them it's like he's speaking to me.
Jack: Exactly. Well, that's the point of religion. The point of religion is to help. And I mean, okay, there's many points of religion. People who are schemy, dark douchebags abuse the concept of religion for profit. That's real s*** happens all the time. Whatever. One of the points of religion. But the problem is these structures could simultaneously exist. Right. So you could have like, well, I'm gonna build a church because they're gonna give me f****** money. Imma keep a lot of it. They don't know how much was given. Nobody counts it. I count It. And I skim more than half. But there's so many people who come to the church. I just make bank, bro. They're all loaded. Oh. Make a church in a really rich area. Past that plate. Just give me money to cleanse your sins, m***********. I own this building, and that all comes to me. But that's like the guy running I, right? I rent that. I rent it with the money to give me. Even if, like, I make more. Way more than they give me is what I'm f****** taking. But whatever. But then there's, like, the pastor, right? And the pastors. Like, I truly believe the word. The owner, he banks on this s***. Whatever. But I truly believe the word of the Bible.
Cristina: Mm.
Jack: And I make sure that every Sunday I'm here and I'm telling them. I'm telling the word of the Lord. The word of the Lord. Oh, Lord. And I go there and I tell them, and they, hallelujah. They. They love my. Where I preach. Well, I make sure I love the people who come to my church. And it's like this. These two structures are simultaneously existing. One dude is just robbing people, and.
Cristina: The other is truly unlike everything else.
Jack: Yeah.
Cristina: It's like the government.
Jack: It's like 100%. Yes. Because nothing. Education, a******* abusing s***.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: It's never the system. It's always the people.
Cristina: It is.
Jack: But the good of religion includes community.
Cristina: Mm.
Jack: It includes fearlessness and hope. So there's always somebody watching out for you.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: Could be a dark alley, and you have to go through that dark alley because it's no other way through. But, you know, you make a little prayer in your head while you're going through. You feel a little better. God's got me. He might not, but you've convinced it's meditation. He might not, but like you, you convinced yourself he does so. Because you gotta do it.
Cristina: And it's like a social club where you're making friends.
Jack: 100%.
Cristina: Also a positive thing.
Jack: There's a million reasons, and it makes people feel better. And in dark times, you have a place to go and people will feel sorry for you and say nice things.
Cristina: Yeah. You can ask for a specific prayer, I think, and stuff like that. You could tell them about your problems.
Jack: It's just meditation. And that's weird. Right. Now, we've talked about meditation and prayers similarities many times and many times on the show. But one of the most interesting aspects about these meditations of prayer is when people get together and chant the prayer. Or there's a bunch of hallelujahs. This one guy prays. Amen. Hallelujah.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: They're surrounding you and they put their hands on your head and on your shoulders and they're like, this is weird, intense kind of meditation. But the same thing happens when, like, you know, light as a feather, stiff as a board. Like one person is the f****** point.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: And everybody else is chanting the thing.
Cristina: It's a prayer.
Jack: It's a meditation. The chance. Well, the chance is part of the meditation. It's the same as prayer. Like when you doing, quote, magic, unquote, you meditating, you grab things and then you chant a couple of words. You know, I want Bob to fall in love with me. He's so alpha. I want that alpha a**. Bob. Oh, Steve's such a beta. Steve. But Bob. Oh, but Bob's already married. But was already married. So I'm gonna grandma. As soon as we're in church and he's sitting in front of me, clip. He's not even know. Take a little bit of his hair.
Cristina: Oh, my God.
Jack: That little bit of hair in a little pawn cauldron. A little cauldron. I'm throw the picture I snapped of him that he did not took.
Cristina: Let's creep this person. Okay.
Jack: I'm gonna go into his trash and pick up something he touched.
Cristina: What?
Jack: Like. Like his. Like his. Like his.
Cristina: Have you done this?
Jack: When he had the flu? Just take it. Take his napkin. I'm gonna sniff it a little. Smells like bomb. And I'll throw it in my little cauldron. And then I gotta bring nature into it. Right? So I need to bring some leaves and some oregano because, you know, vitamins or whatever the.
Cristina: And gotta bring in the elements. What about fire and water?
Jack: That was a. Pour some water in there and light it on fire.
Cristina: Like.
Jack: Like Adele, you know, just when the f******. It's raining and I lit the rain on fire. Okay. She's gonna light her watered cauldron on fire. It's possible Deltatos.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: And you're gonna sit there and you're gonna be like, Bob has a huge wang. I want his wang. I love that thing. Bob has a huge wang. I want his wang. I love that thing. And do it over and over and over and over. And then Bob is. Next time you go to church, he's gonna turn around, he's gonna look at you, and you guys gonna lock eyes. Oh, my chant happened. Worked.
Cristina: That's it. I was expecting him to say something to her. He just stared at her.
Jack: Yeah. No, no. Well, no. This is the beginning of something.
Cristina: She's like, it worked.
Jack: Maybe he always looks at her, but now she's thinking more positively.
Cristina: Yeah, yeah.
Jack: And that maybe, you know, he looked at her that one time and he's. They're in the same church. Of course he's going to see her. And she's just never noticed before because she was in a negative state. But she did this chant and feels like, oh, it's gonna work. And then he looks at her and, oh, my God, he looked at me. And now she has more confidence. So she goes and talks to him and finds out Bob just divorced his wife and he's going to h*** and get by many guys. Because that's what happens.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: And so she's like, I can save you because the Bible said you can marry and then you don't go to h***, so you marry me and do my things. Came true. But had she talked to him without doing the thing, it would have worked anyways. But she's in a better state now.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: Because the meditate worked. Okay. So meditation works that way. It's really weird when a bunch of people do it together and they're like. With their print. But it's, like, intense. Right. Like you zone the f*** out. Assuming.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: Now, unrelated to any. That we're talking about telling that story about Bob. Total in true story.
Cristina: It was.
Jack: You sure? Yeah, Bob. Yeah, Bob. She cut my hair. It was f****** weird. Get a restraining order. Anyways, outside the point. I once once heard a story that I just remembered. And I'm not sure if it was true because gossip and bullshit. But the story goes like this. There is a couple in church. They're not a couple of each other. There's two people, we're gonna say Bob and Miranda.
Cristina: Okay. Now, Bob as a name.
Jack: Yeah, whatever. Bob is married to somebody.
Cristina: Okay.
Jack: Miranda's married to somebody.
Cristina: Mm.
Jack: Bob would go into the bathroom, use the bathroom, leave. But anytime Bob was in the bathroom, Miranda would be standing to use the bathroom next. Always. Somebody noticed this.
Cristina: Okay.
Jack: Right. And they noticed that every time Bob goes to the bathroom, every time Bob goes to the bathroom, Miranda goes to the bathroom after him. One day somebody went after him. No, they didn't go after him. Oh, yeah. I guess into the bathroom. Yeah, he went first. Miranda got up, but they ran and got there first. So I'm gonna use the bathroom before. Yes, they got into the bathroom. There's nothing unique. And something's weird here. So, you know, they look around, look around, look around, look around the bathroom. They find a little paper and in the paper, it's where to meet Miranda.
Cristina: You mean Bob? What do you mean, Bob? Because Miranda is gonna get the paper.
Jack: Miranda's gonna get the paper? Well, yeah, he's. He's writing to Miranda where he's gonna meet Miranda.
Cristina: Oh, okay. Okay.
Jack: Yeah. So it's the cheating when they're very slick about it.
Cristina: Wow.
Jack: Now, I don't know if this story is true, but I was. I've never forgotten that story. It's very interesting that the person telling.
Cristina: You was the person that found the paper. Or they heard this story too.
Jack: Oh, that's the problem. They heard the story. They didn't find the paper. They heard the story. So it's probably bullshit, but it's such a good story.
Cristina: Yeah, I guess.
Jack: It's really interesting. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Cristina: Two couples from a church cheating on their.
Jack: Interesting.
Cristina: That's the worst place to cheat. Come on.
Jack: They weren't cheating in there.
Cristina: Not in there, but still.
Jack: They were definitely using that as the safe space to communicate where best to cheat.
Cristina: Mm. Whoa. Whoa. That's so unrelated, though. Yes. Yes.
Jack: Yeah.
Cristina: That's such a crazy story.
Jack: Remembered that. I don't know. What about meditation made me think of that? But it did.
Cristina: Mm. But we were talking about group meditation.
Jack: Yeah.
Cristina: You think that's weird?
Jack: I think it. Well, it's strange, man. It is like group magic. Yeah, but prayer is magic, essentially. Or meditation, whatever. They're all the same s***. It's all the same.
Cristina: It's all the same. People like to do it together or separate.
Jack: Yeah. Some people do it alone. Some people do it together.
Cristina: Whether it's just meditation, whether it's magic, whether it's religion.
Jack: Some people like the social aspect. Some people like solitude. Some people go home and do magic alone. Some people create a coven.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: Some people don't go to church and just pray. Some people go to church to pray. You know, it's all the same. Some people just meditate alone. Solitude, quiet, clarity.
Cristina: And some people join classes.
Jack: Some people join classes. Some people become f****** monks with a bunch of other monks. Whatever. Some people become monks alone in the middle of f****** nowhere, take vows of silence.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: And hang out wearing the same clothes because they promise God they will or whatever.
Cristina: Yeah. Is there any monks make doing magic?
Jack: Wait, is that the same? What's the difference?
Cristina: Huh? It's the same. Yeah.
Jack: What do you mean?
Cristina: Like monks doing magic? That's the same thing as meditating, I guess. I don't know. But I was thinking then I just remember Dr. Strange, because isn't that the story or something? I don't remember.
Jack: Well, the goal is the same. You want Bob to fall in love with you. You did things that changed how you thought, but you don't think you changed how you thought because you're not the person to think. That kind of stuff works. You did things that make you think. You change how he thinks.
Cristina: Mm.
Jack: And so I'm. Well, I'll be opportunistic. Now that I know it worked, I'm gonna use this moment to my advantage. And now your behavior actually changed instead of his. But in response, his behavior changed.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: Now if you were to sit down and meditate and tell yourself, well, it's not that Bob's not interested in me, it's that I'm not approaching Bob. Maybe I approach Bob and you meditate on that. I should approach Bob. I should be the one to approach Bob. I shouldn't wait on Bob.
Cristina: I have self respect.
Jack: Then you do it. And you get the results.
Cristina: The same results. Yeah.
Jack: As if you would have done the magic. In one, you are aware that yourself, brainwashing, self conditioning, self programming. In the other one, you're convincing yourself that you're not. But it's the same idea, same thing.
Cristina: A good thing, though. Like, whatever you do is better than not doing any of it, because if you didn't, you wouldn't have gotten to that result.
Jack: Yeah.
Cristina: You would never. You would have never spoken to him and never found out.
Jack: Yeah, 100% magic is 100% fine as long as you're not doing, like, horrible things. Like, I'm, you know, I hope. I hope Bob dies. But then, you know, I did all the things. Now I just need to set it in action. Oh, hey, you're taking steps here and s***.
Cristina: You don't think magic to kill people is good? I guess not. That's. That's crazy. I wonder if people do that. Like, what is involved in that?
Jack: I don't know. And you gotta want. You know, black magic takes a lot of power. That's why last time that I tried to kill Bob with my magic, it didn't work. I gotta do it every night for a year and maybe he'll die. Then Bob had cancer and died. And you're like, yeah, man, I gave him cancer, but he always had cancer. Bob was born with cancer. He says, no.
Cristina: Yeah, that's how that works.
Jack: Or old age kills Bob. And you're like, I did it. I did it. I killed Bob.
Cristina: I guess whatever makes you happy.
Jack: Yeah, it's all crazy.
Cristina: It's all crazy. At least they're not murdering Bob. I guess that makes black magic not bad, because they're not actually murdering anyone. They're just hoping really hard that that person dies.
Jack: Unless you're like, imma make a potion and give it the BOB it's like you just poison f****** bob, bro.
Cristina: No, that's not. That's different. Okay. I was just thinking of just hoping that they die. That's okay.
Jack: Poisoning my clever murder potion. Here is a flower. Here's a rose. An oregano leaf. Because vitamins. And some rat poison. That rat poison is particularly important in the.
Cristina: There's no poisoning happening. I hope.
Jack: I mean, I'm sure people are doing it.
Cristina: Poisoning other people with rat poison? Yes. But, like, for magic.
Jack: Yes.
Cristina: That's not really magical.
Jack: I mean, it's a potion. It's a potion with some oregano for vitamins.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: Because that's the important part.
Cristina: Mmm.
Jack: I'm not just gonna kill you. I'm gonna make sure you're healthy while I kill you. While you die, you can get some vitamins. Your body's gonna be like, thanks. And then die. What?
Cristina: Yeah, it's like.
Jack: I mean, in any case, it should replace it with some kale.
Cristina: Yeah. I was thinking. Why didn't you say kale first? That was weird.
Jack: Because oregano has vitamins, too.
Cristina: But kale is probably stronger.
Jack: Yeah, but it seems like you'd throw oregano in a cauldron. As opposed to kale. Kale looks too lettucey. It's all fluffy and stuff. While oregano just looks like a leaf. And it just makes sense to snap a leaf off and throw it in a pot.
Cristina: Oh, yeah.
Jack: Visually, yes. It looks more magic.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: As opposed to, like. Is that lettuce in your colon? If somebody were to walk to your house while you're performing the spell, you know, you're Miranda. You're making spells to kill Bob. Because f*** Bob.
Cristina: And your friend just Xanthonox.
Jack: And you open up. Oh, yeah. I'm doing magic. Well, I guess. In any case. In any case, Samantha's the one doing the magic. Miranda's the one who's trying to f*** Bob. So Samantha's trying. And then Miranda knocks on the door.
Cristina: Samantha's the one that's married to Bob.
Jack: No, neither one of them married to Bob.
Cristina: Oh, okay.
Jack: But Miranda shows up and Samantha is like, oh, I'm just making a spell to kill Bob. But I love Bob. Yeah, but he doesn't love me.
Cristina: Wait, what?
Jack: Both of them love Bob. One of them is like, I'm Gonna murder him. The other one's like, I'm gonna make him fall in love with me.
Cristina: Oh, okay.
Jack: One of us is gonna win.
Cristina: What about the other two?
Jack: What other two?
Cristina: These aren't Sex and the City characters. I don't know.
Jack: Yeah, they totally are.
Cristina: Okay, what is it?
Jack: Carrie, Miranda, Samantha.
Cristina: And.
Jack: Miranda's the slutty one. No, that might be Samantha.
Cristina: Well, now she's the murdery one.
Jack: Yeah, whatever. One of them is murder. One of them is in love with them. And so she shows up and sees your f****** lettuce instead. I don't know what the f*** you do magic with lettuce, but if it was just some dragon leaf, she'd be like, yeah, it looks like magic, but if there's just kale and there's like, you cooking.
Cristina: Oh, okay, you cooking.
Jack: You cooking with rat poison. You make that kind of food? You try.
Cristina: Well, it would be less suspicious if you were cooking lettuce then.
Jack: And it's like, man, this. This rat poison don't look like it should be in that lettuce or that. That rat poison is awfully close to your salad. I think some of it got into your salad, bro.
Cristina: And how do you trick someone to drink your magic potion?
Jack: You just walk up to him and said, it's a gift. And then, yeah, it's a present. And then you stand there and watch him open it. It's a tiny little bottle, and you're like, you should drink it.
Cristina: And he says, like, gift. Why is there, like, tiny leaves in this thing?
Jack: I made it. Oh, you're telling him it has vitamins? That's ore. It's vitamins.
Cristina: Because if he said it was kill.
Jack: He'D be like, yeah, but if you said oregano. Well, I've had oregano and other things. Yeah, like, yes, oregano. Vitamins. You're gonna. It's gonna be good for you.
Cristina: Mm.
Jack: And then she's in prison forever for murder. Manslaughter. First degree is. First is. It is first degree when somebody's like, they're f****** doing it. Like, they're there doing it. Like, if you poison him, is that like third degree? No, it's not first degree. Third degree is worse, Right?
Cristina: I don't know which way it goes.
Jack: I think third degree manslaughter is crazy. As opposed to first degree manslaughter. So, like, I poisoned him first degree. I choked his life out of his body.
Cristina: Are you sure it's not the opposite? I don't know. I don't know.
Jack: Yeah, I don't know. Either. Okay. S***. Alright, so first degree is worse. Third degree. So if she just poisons him, third degree would be the poison. Right? Like manslaughter. If we're talking manslaughter, the charge you're getting is manslaughter is third degree. Manslaughter kind of removed, detached, like far away. Kind of like, I did it, I did it. Yeah, but I wasn't there for it. I did it, but I wasn't there for it.
Cristina: But you were there for it.
Jack: I mean, not literally. You didn't like choke the life out of him? You didn't put a gun to his head or anything? Versus first degree vicious. I was f****** like choking the light. I looked into his eyes as the lights went out.
Cristina: Oh my gosh. Shooting someone, is that first, second, third? Because that's pretty violent.
Jack: It is. It is, right? Like the degree here's. So you gotta be in contact with them. So then a gun makes it second degree murder because you're not in contact with him. You did it and you were there, but you weren't like physically. But it's like first degree. One hand on his neck, the other one on the knife.
Cristina: Like that level of proximity is worse than.
Jack: I think the degree is worse because we're also gauging how vicious and dangerous you are.
Cristina: Okay, what's the charge?
Jack: How crazy are you? Did you do some mild.
Cristina: Like, did you shoot him once or did you shoot him 50 times?
Jack: That's interesting. Does that change the degree?
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: Is it like. Well, he was still not like, physically in contact with him. It's less aggressive than had she stabbed him that many times.
Cristina: Mm.
Jack: Because then she's there sort of like present for it.
Cristina: But if she just shot him 50 times.
Jack: Yeah. Is that worse or better? Like, right. That's the weird. Cuz I feel like. Okay, let's say they're both first degree. I definitely do feel like the guy who rolled up in a car, shot the one dude 50 times and rolled away. Way less bad than the guy who walked up to a dude and stabbed him 50 times. One of those is way f****** worse.
Cristina: What if you change what they're holding? Like, what if the knife is like the small kitchen knife and the gun is like, I don't know, Rick's gun from Walking Dead.
Jack: Okay, first, that hole that that guy has with the. The Cult Magnum.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: Huge even. Although little of his body is left after that encounter, it still feels less aggressive. Also, where is he has he's Rick. Growing bullets out of the dirt?
Cristina: Yes. He shot him 50 times with that.
Jack: With that six chamber.
Cristina: Yeah, he had. Maybe he just had. He was just switching guns while he was doing it.
Jack: Just.
Cristina: He has a bunch.
Jack: There's a bunch of Colt Magnum revolvers.
Cristina: Enough to shoot someone 50 times with.
Jack: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So it's still less bad. There's something so nuts about seeing somebody just stab the living out of somebody else.
Cristina: But also, doesn't it matter? Like, if you were thinking about killing them or it just randomly out of anger?
Jack: Well, no. Those are different charges we're talking about.
Cristina: Those are. Okay.
Jack: I specifically said manslaughter.
Cristina: Oh, okay. Yes.
Jack: Like, you could say crime of passion. You could say premeditated murder. Those are different charges.
Cristina: Oh, okay.
Jack: But I'm trying to gauge. What are we considering? Bad.
Cristina: Yes. And you're saying knife.
Jack: I think a knife is way worse. You as the person stabbing. You're there through the whole process. When you pull a trigger on a gun, it's just done.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: You pull the trigger, it finished. You did. You got to pull it again, and it's already finished before you can think about the fact that you pulled the trigger. Just done. You stab somebody. You could just go in once and just hold it there and. Like you're still present as f***.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: And then you pull it out. You still got the tool you did.
Cristina: It with, and you're just poisoning then. Worse than the gun thing because you're up close still.
Jack: You don't have to be up close.
Cristina: You don't have to. But in this case, in this imaginary case where you're just watching them as they drink your.
Jack: No, I don't think it changes anything.
Cristina: Oh.
Jack: Because that person is dying as a result of your actions, but you're not literally acting on them dying.
Cristina: Oh, okay.
Jack: Like, you gave them the bottle. You could just walk away. Maybe he drinks and maybe he doesn't. That feels way more removed than I'm for a fact. Even if I'm over there, I shot you. You wouldn't die without my action.
Cristina: Mm.
Jack: Like, over there. I set the situation. But maybe you don't die. Maybe you never drink it. You're like, oh, this b**** is kind of crazy. Throw it away.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: Then you live forever because not drinking it is how you become immortal, as said by God in the Bible.
Cristina: He becomes immortal because he doesn't drink it. All right, but he still. Then he ends up marrying Matilda, though. Or Miranda.
Jack: Yes, because he outlives his wife, who dies because he's immortal.
Cristina: Okay, but Miranda's not immortal.
Jack: She's also immortal because magic she made. They're both immortal. Because magic.
Cristina: Because magic. Okay.
Jack: No, but Samantha's magic failed. Well, God gives people magic.
Cristina: Oh, okay.
Jack: Forgetting that prayer and magic are the same thing.
Cristina: That's. Yes, I forget that. Yes, God is very magical. And he can make people magical.
Jack: Yes, he makes many. There's many saints. Sometimes he gives Pete the wrong people magic, like St. Patrick, and then he's just, like, overpowered. He's like, I'm f****** strong arm God, and to do whatever I want.
Cristina: Then their bloods become magical, and you could, like, pray to their blood and it'll make. It'll heal you. Yes, like some.
Jack: Thus.
Cristina: That's crazy.
Jack: Well, let's. Let's be clear here. Let's be totally clear here, because this is canon and it's totally part of the lore that Jesus Christ drank some. No, actually, this is my theory. Right. Jesus Christ became a vampire. Not by drinking blood. We know he's the first vampire, factually, but he's the first vampire because he does know where the tree is, and he ate the fruit. Bam.
Cristina: That kept him alive forever.
Jack: Yes.
Cristina: Not needing to drink blood. He just liked drinking blood.
Jack: But the thing is in his blood. And what do we do afterwards? What do his homies do? They drink his f****** blood.
Cristina: Yes, but what makes him a vampire is that he actually drinks blood too. Are you saying he's not a vampire or. He is a vampire.
Jack: That's a complicated question. Is he drinking blood is the question.
Cristina: Yes. That's all I want to know.
Jack: Because we know he's immortal.
Cristina: We know he's immortal and he wants people to drink his blood, but is he's drinking other people's blood.
Jack: Oh, s***. You know, all this actually checks out, though, because we do know that Jehovah of Light, after being imprisoned by Jehovah of Dark, mm, for many years, figured out, if I become mortal, then escape my prison and I could f****** kill Jehovah of Dark or imprison him or whatever happens. We don't know. He's just not around anymore. We know that much. So then he became Jesus and then became a God from the point of Jesus. So the question is, did he invent the path? And because we know God of Dark now, we know at least came from the shadow realm, he didn't need blood. Is the fruit a metaphor for blood? And Jehovah of Light invented the idea of adrenochrome by drinking blood. People drank blood before. Sacrifices were done before.
Cristina: Oh, my gosh. The fruit isn't fruit. It's blood.
Jack: It's A metaphor.
Cristina: It's blood.
Jack: It's a blood.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: He drank blood to become immortal.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: And then managed to become God again and stop Jehovah of dark.
Cristina: And then he gave it to other people to live forever.
Jack: So he became a vampire. He was a vampire.
Cristina: He was a vampire. What? But then whose blood is the tree? Also just maybe a creature. It's that cow from the Norse mythology. The space cow.
Jack: F*** you totally right about that one point because we established the entire. We talked about this very point before.
Cristina: Two brothers with the cow. Because if the good one is good and one is evil, if it's still Jesus, you know the. What is it? The dark and the light.
Jack: Yeah.
Cristina: They had another. The cow. What if that's a real thing too?
Jack: Well, no, we know that Jehovah of light and Jehovah dark are probably unrelated. Not really Jehovah. This is some s*** we call them. They're not brothers. They're just two things. One of them came out of nowhere.
Cristina: But that story is one is based on the other. Like they're still there fighting. And there might have been something else with them.
Jack: Well, the theory here is that whatever. Because Jehovah is still a demigod even when he's God got it out. Because even Santa Claus is more powerful than he is. Yeah, but because you're thinking omniscient God like you think the creation of the universe scale.
Cristina: Oh, okay.
Jack: Jehovah didn't do that. He's nowhere near that powerful. But what blood did he drink? That's the question. He became quickly took a three year period from the time that he began preaching to the time that he died and transcended.
Cristina: I think it's fairy blood now that I'm thinking about because there has to be a creature that Santa Claus or.
Jack: Santa Claus didn't do. But you know, he works with fairies or whatever.
Cristina: But I think fairies is the solution because they can easily come from there to here.
Jack: Why have we never talked about this before? There's so many interesting things. What blood did Jesus take? Is the fruit just a metaphor? And fairy blood.
Cristina: It makes sense. Never cross our mind the fairies were the gods. The God literally drink the fairy blood and then that's weakened the fairies to just be fairies.
Jack: And he didn't drink all their blood? Drink the blood of every.
Cristina: No, I guess not. But he. Yes, but still. Okay. It's possible though that he drank fairy blood.
Jack: It's possible he drank fairy blood. But fairies can't compete with Jehovah because Jehovah can give a random dude, the power to get rid of the fairies. You see my point? Like, the fairies were not that crazy. Like, a random demigod is stronger. They were called gods by people who hadn't seen the demigods at rule.
Cristina: Okay?
Jack: And then when they did, they're like, no, those are the gods. But they haven't seen Santa Claus and like, the creators of the universe or whatever, which are like omniscient, overpowered beings. Okay, really? Santa Clauses for Earth? Yeah, but there's like some s*** Santa Claus, like, what the f***?
Cristina: Mm.
Jack: You know, like, can Santa Claus combat the sun? No, that's just some f****** creek. An overpowered cloud that would s*** on f******. I can destroy your whole planet in one shot.
Cristina: But would he still be alive if he did that?
Jack: Who, Santa?
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: No, he'd be f*****. Because who's he's gonna get fear from, huh?
Cristina: But he lives that attack and just.
Jack: Maybe he might have the power scale to at least survive the destruction of Earth and just live in the vacuum. But now you don't have your source of adrenochrome.
Cristina: And then you'll become adrenochrome.
Jack: But fear. Yes.
Cristina: Oh, s***.
Jack: Interesting.
Cristina: Feral Santa Claus. Oh, wait, there's a creature like that already. Oh, my gosh.
Jack: Krampus.
Cristina: Krampus. Yep.
Jack: Interesting. Interesting. And he also knows if you're being naughty or nice. Well, they work together.
Cristina: Things that work.
Jack: Allegedly.
Cristina: Allegedly. Yeah. Maybe that's just Santa having a bad day.
Jack: Yeah.
Cristina: Not enough fear.
Jack: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Christmas spirit is down this year, and he's. He's getting to that point where he's tweaking out a bit.
Cristina: Yeah. Like, maybe that does happen. Maybe he's not as strong as we thought he was. Well, he's strong, but not as. Like, he doesn't get as much power as we thought.
Jack: No, he does. Just. He has. Here's the trick we got to remember, you're always the level of power you got.
Cristina: Mm.
Jack: It's just whether you're feral or not.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: You don't lose the level of power you have. Like, a zombie is still f****** nuts.
Cristina: Yeah, it's f*****.
Jack: It's just not gonna stop the same way vampires just f****** nuts. It's just not gonna stop. But there's a difference in distribution because one is clear minded and conscious and the other one's feral as f***.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: They're so equally powerful. Like, you can have zombies versus vampires. And realistically, chances are the vampire is gonna f****** lose out because you can't drink the zombie blood. And as a vampire, you Use way more of your energy while a tiny little bit of it is enough to keep the zombie going.
Cristina: Mm.
Jack: So, like, feral's probably stronger.
Cristina: Yes. Yeah.
Jack: Yeah. Because you're not holding back.
Cristina: Mm.
Jack: The same amount of power you had before. So you can the drinochrome or the fear, depending which one you're using brings you up. And you never come down from the roof you were at. That's why we can have a feral God like Jehovah fall off the wagon, and he's still just as powerful. Yeah, but he's evil, doing crazy things. Or at least we thought until we found out that they weren't even the same guy.
Cristina: Yeah, it's too different. So. But do you think it's fairies?
Jack: It could totally be, man.
Cristina: It's crazy because that was the original thing coming from somewhere else to here before Jesus.
Jack: Yes. And that actually Jehovah got. Jehovah Dark must have gotten the idea from the fairies because they could come in and out easily. And Jehovah Dark is not a fairy. As far as we know.
Cristina: As far as we know.
Jack: But if he were, then so is Jehovah. No, because he didn't go. No, because the problem is Jehovah Dark would have come through sooner. He would have been there at the beginning. No, he was at a spot.
Cristina: He was at a spot. Yeah.
Jack: There were people before that, so. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Cristina: No to the fairies.
Jack: No to Jehovah Dark being a fairy.
Cristina: Okay.
Jack: Or either Jehovah.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: But we got questions to answer, and we probably have to catch a fairy now.
Cristina: Oh, that's hard.
Jack: Because we got to find out if the fruit is a metaphor for blood.
Cristina: If it is, it has to be. Oh, my gosh.
Jack: If it is, whose blood did Jesus drink?
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: Was it a fairy? And if it is, should we be catching fairies and feeding them to the sub humans?
Cristina: Are we already giving them adrenochrome?
Jack: Yeah, but we're gonna f****** give them fairy blood. Okay, bro. Can fairies feel fears? Then the question.
Cristina: I don't think so. I don't think so. I've never.
Jack: This is magical blood. It wasn't even like adrenochrome. It was just magic blood. Yes, because also, there's no vampire like Jesus. This is another thing. Whatever he did have was unique.
Cristina: It was.
Jack: And even people drinking his blood, like, there are people who drink blood. There are creatures who drink blood, and they are a certain thing. We know humans who drink blood become a vampire, but there's no vampire like Jesus. There's just Jesus and even the people who drank Jesus blood, we call those people apostles. The people who literally drank his blood, they're still not like Jesus.
Cristina: Nope.
Jack: He had something special.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: But it could also be the fact that he was God ahead of time and became this mortal vessel just to escape the imprisonment that Jehovah of Dark put him in. So who knows?
Cristina: Who knows?
Jack: There's many.
Cristina: Let's go see though.
Jack: Yes, we have.
Cristina: Double check this apple thing.
Jack: We have. We have roads to take now. But yes, we're. We're out here running out of time. Although that's so fascinating. Oh, so cool. I've never thought of this before. You have questions.
Cristina: That makes so much sense.
Jack: Questions to answer. Anyways, if you guys are curious about how we came to any, like, any of these pieces of lore that you just heard. There's many and it's always getting more complicated.
Cristina: It really is very intricate and dense. Came out of nowhere.
Jack: Yeah. We can hear how we discovered Jehovah of Dark is from the shadow realm. And we can. You can see how we found out that Jehovah, there are two Jehovah's and all the other creatures that come from the shadow realm and what adrenochrome is and how gods feed off of fear and like any number of things.
Cristina: And why Jesus is a vampire or Jesus a vampire.
Jack: That's happened many times. He's had that one. There's a bunch of stuff.
Cristina: Yep.
Jack: You find all that stuff on the official website, greethoughts.info on Apple Podcast, Spotify, or anywhere you get your podcasts.
Cristina: And you can reach us on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and TikTok at JustConvopod.
Jack: Yes. And remember to rate, review, and most importantly, subscribe.
Cristina: Yes. And let someone who might like this show know about it.
Jack: Yes. Word of mouth. If you have somebody who's brainwashed into religion, show them that they're worshiping the devil by telling them it's Jehovah of.
Cristina: Dark and you're going to h***. And.
Jack: And if you go to h***, you're gonna get by a bunch of dudes.
Cristina: Yep. This has been the Rambling Podcast. Take nothing personal and thanks for listening.
Jack: Bye.
Cristina: Maybe, maybe he just loves having hot sauce. So he brings it around with him just for food. And then he was like, oh, but I can also use this.
Jack: You think he's out here promoting a special hot sauce to everybody he has sex with?
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: He's like, he thought this was hot. He thought this sex was hot. You wouldn't believe what I've got. And then his homie just hands him a bottle of hot sauce and he's like, the Drake official hot sauce.
Cristina: He should have his own hot sauce.
Jack: He probably does. I bet most f****** celebrities got some hot sauce. Especially because it's, like, big now.
Cristina: Hot sauce.
Jack: Yeah, because of wings. Of hot wings.
Cristina: He should definitely advertise some hot sauce. That would be great. Good morning. Good morning. The podcast is hosted by Christina Collazo and Jack Thomas, produced by Lynn Taylor and Published by Great Thoughts.in Fox Art by Zero Lupo and logo by Seth McAllister, with social media managed by Amber Black.