Unworthy
/Who did this to you..
which of the times you were abandoned did it become a defect on your heart to the deepest parts of your unconscious mind
Why do you respond by thickening your skin to handle the repeated abuse, the unimaginable pain the people you loved have laid on you like a curse
instead of guarding your heart to no longer serve those that hold no value in your life
You’ve spent your life feeling inadequate to compete with women who aren’t near your level and throwing yourself at the feet of men who were unworthy
You were taught that sacrifice is love and You’ve rejected love that gives instead of takes
The idea that pleasure is for you and not just the men who are using you was so foreign you were afraid of your own orgasm
You think denial is necessary and going without is normal
No one taught you that your body is a temple filled with tiny miracles and holy enough that people should come there to worship
Instead you believed your body was a tool to be used to reach a goal, but never your own.
Sex does not equate love.. and there is no satisfaction in sex without love, that is not self serving
You are used to people looking through you that when someone actually sees... you feel naked and exposed
To which you immediately feel shame and apologize for existing like you aren’t supposed to be seen
It is so tragic that you hide your power like you don’t deserve to have it
Afraid that you will make someone feel bad about what they lack
Afraid to destroy the people who hold you down
You have a voice. You have a soul that is not of this world. You love so fiercely that you should be the center of a bidding war not a thrift store find.
Stop giving yourself freely to people who can’t afford you.
Be more selective in who get to bathe in your sunshine because you don’t have a light, you harness the fucking sun
Channel the storm to fight those who break you instead of punishing yourself for their crimes
Be your own peace and let the inferior work on themselves until they can learn to appreciate the gifts you’ve given.
By Gabriella Nelson
From: United States