Rambling 202: More Animal Stuff

Following last week’s discussion about animals and the results Google coughed up the duo dive deeper and get even more random stats to compare different animals from all walks of life. From the fastest to the largest, all the data is present.

+Episode Details

Topics Discussed:

  • Largest Animals
  • Fastest Animals
  • Smallest Animals
  • Smartest Animals
  • Deadliest Animals

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+Transcript

Cristina: Warning. This program contains strong themes meant for a mature audience. Discretion is advised.

Jack: Going live in 5, 4.

Cristina: What does live mean?

Jack: Welcome to the Rambling Podcast. I'm your host, Jack.

Cristina: And I'm Christina.

Jack: And this is the show where we ground humanity's most absurd and baffling ideas. Today, we have some particularly baffling ideas.

Cristina: What are they?

Jack: They're too baffling.

Cristina: The two. Baffling.

Jack: They're too baffling. So I decided to make a huge list of ideas that are too baffling to comprehend. But in making them, I was baffled through the writing process, and I don't know what I wrote.

Cristina: It was that baffling?

Jack: It was too baffling.

Cristina: Whoa.

Jack: So I have a list. It's just too baffling to comprehend or read.

Cristina: But you could read it.

Jack: No, it's too baffling.

Cristina: What?

Jack: Yeah.

Cristina: Well, you have to try to read it.

Jack: I tried. It's just too baffling.

Cristina: We can try right now.

Jack: No, we can't.

Cristina: Why?

Jack: It's too baffling. It's so baffling. Its location baffles me.

Cristina: It's location. How's that possible?

Jack: All of it is too baffling. But listen to me. Last week on Dragon Ball Z, we were talking about Google and its animals.

Cristina: Google.

Jack: We were talking to Google. Talking to Google about its animals. Yeah. About sizes, and it was about sizes. We were talking to it about the largest animals, and we were talking to it about.

Cristina: If this was Dragon Ball Z, the largest animal is that dinosaur.

Jack: Which one? The one that Goku hunted as a child.

Cristina: Yeah, yeah, the T. Rex.

Jack: No, I was. Was cell bigger when he became that giant ball to blow up.

Cristina: Also, what about the dragon that makes wishes?

Jack: Oh, that's way bigger.

Cristina: We already figured out the biggest thing. Yeah, with the dragon.

Jack: Yeah, it's like Nitro Shenron or whatever the h*** his name is. He's the largest thing because he's wrapping around entire, like, universes.

Cristina: Yeah. That's pretty crazy.

Jack: How do you see that? Okay. We can't comprehend God, assuming he's trapped within our own reality.

Cristina: Mm.

Jack: We're gonna be like. Yeah. We're gonna see the dragon wrapping around, like, 12 different realities simultaneously. And he's coiled up from how long he is.

Cristina: That's ridiculous.

Jack: How can a being look at that and see anything?

Cristina: They can't.

Jack: They can't. Right beyond a certain point.

Cristina: Maybe their. Their God has the ability to see it.

Jack: Does it? It's. I don't know. It's crazy.

Cristina: We don't know His Abilities, though.

Jack: Zeno.

Cristina: Zeno. Yeah. Like maybe he has the ability to see it. He has the ability to make it and destroy it. Like everything.

Jack: Yeah, he does. He blinked the universe out of existence just because. Haha.

Cristina: Yeah.

Jack: So, I mean, would God give a crap? He wouldn't, like, whatever, make another one.

Cristina: Yeah, he makes sense.

Jack: Yeah, it makes sense, right? That's a. That's a logical God. I dismiss the notion of a God that gives a crap. It wouldn't make sense. That's a demigod. You like kind of God, but you still got emotions. You're definitely kind of human.

Cristina: Mm. You're way more alien than anything.

Jack: Yeah, you're just a weird. Yeah. You're probably just an alien. To be real.

Cristina: Yes. So what God got would more be more like. What's his name?

Jack: Zeno.

Cristina: Zeno.

Jack: Like ultra mega, top of the line. I'm the omniscient. All knowing, all seeing. Like that God doesn't care.

Cristina: He couldn't.

Jack: That doesn't make any sense.

Cristina: But he cares about something.

Jack: No, he couldn't. He couldn't. If he made everything, everything is equal.

Cristina: Yeah, it does seem like that for him, doesn't it?

Jack: I guess that would make sense. Or maybe he has favorite favorites. Like humans could be his favorite thing. Like everybody has a favorite thing they made and the thing they hate the most. That they made.

Cristina: Yes. Okay.

Jack: Right. We could just be the favorite. That's fine.

Cristina: Mm. I don't know if we are, but, well, regardless.

Jack: We're definitely part of the. The food chain.

Cristina: Yes. Are we the biggest thing? The biggest, smartest thing? Are we the smartest big thing? We make sense.

Jack: We're pretty smart and we're pretty big, but we're not the smartest biggest thing. But we're also nowhere near the smallest thing.

Cristina: Of course we're not the smallest thing.

Jack: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So we're not the smartest biggest thing, but we're definitely not the smallest thing.

Cristina: Mm.

Jack: There's abusively tiny things.

Cristina: Yes.

Jack: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Cristina: Like what?

Jack: Look at that photo.

Cristina: Is that a werewolf?

Jack: It's a marmoset. It's a pygmy marmoset. Things called pygmies are really tiny things.

Cristina: But what's a marmoset?

Jack: I have no idea. What a marmoset.

Cristina: Is that a werewolf?

Jack: It's some sort of creature. Maybe a monkey.

Cristina: Could be a monkey. It looks so weird.

Jack: What is a marmoset? So.

Cristina: So marmosets are weird? Not just the little ones. They're all weird. It's a small Squirrel like monkey. It has many features that are unusual among primates. They don't say what, but they look strange. Like just the regular marmosets. Not even just that tiny werewolf that you're showing us. Look at this dude. He looks like a bird or something. Like, like just standing from a tree covered in like. You would think that was an owl or something. I don't know. It's very strange. It's a cat like owl, monkey. Look at this, look at this one. Oh, no, that's the pygmy one. Oh, that's a pygmy one. But it looks like a cat. Owl.

Jack: Yes, it does.

Cristina: But just look at the common one. This is the common one down here. See, look, White face, weird ears. Like, what? What's going on? What's going on? Very strange.

Jack: It's a monkey.

Cristina: So it's like the world's smallest monkey, I'm guessing.

Jack: Yeah, I suppose. Maroset is the world's smallest monkey.

Cristina: How small does it get?

Jack: How small does this monkey get? 4 inches.

Cristina: 4 inches. Oh, my gosh. That is so tiny.

Jack: That's a tiny, tiny monkey.

Cristina: That is a tiny monkey. That's like an adult is a four inch.

Jack: Yeah, it's a monkey that's smaller than a dollar.

Cristina: Wow. That is too cute. Even though it looks crazy.

Jack: Here's a lemur mouse.

Cristina: Is it a mouse though?

Jack: Or is it a lemur?

Cristina: No. Is a lemur a type of mouse?

Jack: I guess.

Cristina: Not a mouse. I wrote it. No, lemurs are monkeys.

Jack: Lemurs are monkeys.

Cristina: I don't know. Lemurs are primates.

Jack: They're what? They are monkeys. They're not monkeys, but, you know, primates.

Cristina: Close enough. But then what is that that we're looking at? Is that a monkey or is that a rat?

Jack: So what is. I mean, we know what a mouse.

Cristina: Is, but is it calling it like a mouse sized lemur or a lemur sized mouse? Like, what's going on?

Jack: It looks. It looks like a rodent does.

Cristina: Yeah. They come from the same place. Madagascar.

Jack: Fascinating.

Cristina: What?

Jack: So this is another primate like the marmoset. Whoa. Whoa.

Cristina: They're so strange. They're so tiny. There's something about being so tiny that they don't look like what they're supposed to be.

Jack: Yes. They become some whole other thing.

Cristina: Yes. What?

Jack: This here is a bee. Hummingbird.

Cristina: Bee hummingbird. Oh my gosh.

Jack: It could be 2 inches tall.

Cristina: What? But hummingbirds are tiny birds, right? Or they're big hummingbirds.

Jack: Like they're already. Yeah, they're already Pretty small.

Cristina: Yeah. And these are just the smallest of the small?

Jack: Yeah, they're the tiniest of the tiny.

Cristina: Aw, they're so cute and colorful.

Jack: Oh yeah. I guess most birds have that ability. Isn't that interesting? Now here's something fascinating. The marmoset, the pygmy marmoset can live up to 12 years. You know primates, nice long lives. I guess that's not really long compared to like a dog or something. And then the mouse lemur does six to eight years. You know, it's tiny, it's a little short, it died quick. But then this, the bee, hummingbird, it does seven to 10 years.

Cristina: Seven to 10 years.

Jack: So this bird lives about as long as that rat, Monkey, what? Actually maybe a little longer. On the flip side, so does. What is it called? Parrots. Parrots have absurdly long lives. Parrots have really, really, really, really long lives.

Cristina: How long?

Jack: Like 30 years maybe.

Cristina: They're big.

Jack: Yes.

Cristina: Okay, but how long was this one? Two years. Ten years.

Jack: Seven to ten.

Cristina: Seven to ten. Oh.

Jack: Now here is a hognose bat.

Cristina: Oh my gosh, I can't see its nose. Hog nose bat.

Jack: Yes. And it is about an inch.

Cristina: What is that the smallest animal?

Jack: No, but it's a pretty small one.

Cristina: Does that also live a very short life?

Jack: Five to 10 years.

Cristina: Five to 10.

Jack: Five to 10 years. But that's not the smallest. We enter something much smaller, the tardigrade.

Cristina: But is that an animal?

Jack: Yes, it's counted as one of the smallest animals.

Cristina: But what is it counted as exactly?

Jack: Yeah, it's an animal. Like what, what do you mean like.

Cristina: What kind of animal?

Jack: I forget the name of that. There's. It's something.

Cristina: An insect?

Jack: No, no, it's an animal. It's a type of animal. A phylum. I'm assuming that says phylum.

Cristina: What is a film.

Jack: That'S hard to grade is a phylum, phelim of 8.

Cristina: Legged segmented micro animals. What does that even mean? What does that even mean?

Jack: I don't know.

Cristina: What are micro animals? So this isn't the only micro animal?

Jack: No, there's this thing right here.

Cristina: Oh my gosh, that's horrifying.

Jack: This one's microscopic.

Cristina: Okay, so it's. But the, the, what was the last one?

Jack: The tardigrade.

Cristina: Tardigrade is also microscopic.

Jack: It's so small it's hard to see.

Cristina: But it's not microscopic.

Jack: You can. It's like on the edge. It's as close as small as you can get before you're microscopic.

Cristina: Okay. Everything microscopic is scary.

Jack: Oh, yeah. And everything macroscopic is too.

Cristina: Yeah, I know. Which is more horrifying? I don't know. These might.

Jack: And everything. Anything in any extreme is crazy. I think of really, really old, unevolved animals. Like when we're traveling the depths of the ocean to the crap that survives all the meteor nonsense that happened.

Cristina: Disturbing.

Jack: Yeah. It's like monsters down there. And it's because any extreme is too alien from the norm.

Cristina: What is that one called, though?

Jack: Loricifera.

Cristina: It's beautiful. It's scary, but beautiful.

Jack: Yeah. It's like an octopus flower thing.

Cristina: Yeah. It looks like a flower vase or something. Yeah.

Jack: It's not even an octopus. Like a squid. Like a squid vase, plant thing.

Cristina: Yeah, it's. It's so alien. It's hard to imagine that that's a living thing. That's an animal too.

Jack: That is an animal.

Cristina: What?

Jack: And it's in the same category as a tardigrade. They're in the same species to some degree. Not species, I guess. Yeah.

Cristina: Type of. Whatever they are or whatever people.

Jack: Genus. Genus. Not the best, but you get my point. Now you were asking about size. I jumped to small. Well, let me tell you what some of the smarter, bigger things are, okay. The African elephant is a freaking giant.

Cristina: Yes. Well, is it bigger than. How big is it from a regular elephant? Because those are big, aren't they?

Jack: Yeah, regular elephants are pretty big. Fair enough. I'm assuming this is a significant uptick. Look at that.

Cristina: Whoa. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. That's a person next to the elephant. Oh, my gosh. Powering him.

Jack: Yeah. And elephants are significantly intelligent. Like, they're pretty smart.

Cristina: Mm.

Jack: So elephant. African elephants on average can get up to 10ft tall. That's two humans standing on top. Two five foot individuals standing one on top of the other.

Cristina: Okay.

Jack: Counting from its shoulders. Not its head.

Cristina: His shoulders at its head.

Jack: Yes. From where its shoulders hit their peak as opposed to where its head does.

Cristina: Where do you think its head reaches?

Jack: With its head up, it has to be like 13ft.

Cristina: Wow.

Jack: But 10ft is where it's at and it can be up to £13,000.

Cristina: How. How much does it have to eat to be like that?

Jack: Probably a lot.

Cristina: That's crazy.

Jack: Just crap ton of pounds all day eating, I guess, if they. If people give them. No, they have. I don't know, man. How did an elephant survive in. Oh, no. It eats fruits, right?

Cristina: Yeah.

Jack: And it eats plants.

Cristina: Yeah.

Jack: Is it just really efficient at processing things very slowly and sucking out all the nutrients Maybe really developed internal system.

Cristina: Humongous.

Jack: Yeah, that's pretty much like the big intelligent one. But there's a bunch of really big animals and a bunch of really intelligent animals.

Cristina: Okay, let's go with the big ones.

Jack: Out of the big ones outside of the elephant, that's a huge, huge, huge, crazy thing. And the, if you remember from last week, the 13 foot freakin hippo.

Cristina: Long.

Jack: 13Ft long?

Cristina: Mm.

Jack: Something that's just tall in general. Is the, the ostrich the biggest bird?

Cristina: I think.

Jack: Yes.

Cristina: I think it also has the biggest eyes a bird can have like a ratio, right?

Jack: Yeah, yeah. Eyes to body ratio. They're huge freaking eyes. But despite its crazy height, it's still like incredibly light.

Cristina: Really?

Jack: It's still a bird?

Cristina: Yeah. It's so fragile looking with its legs. Like how is that leg carrying? I mean feathers don't weigh much.

Jack: Yeah, there's no weight. It's carrying no weight.

Cristina: Oh, okay.

Jack: But this allows it to be crazy fast.

Cristina: How fast? Like cheetah fast? No, they can run up to 30, 30 to 37 miles per hour and sprint up to 43 miles per hour.

Jack: It's like in a straight shot, 43 miles per hour.

Cristina: Can you outrun it?

Jack: No. I think the fastest human speed ever recorded could not compete with that. Yeah, I'm like super sure the fastest human goes max way too low. I'll give it. I don't even know what would be average. Like 13 miles per hour. So what does it say? The average is 8 miles per hour.

Cristina: Men 8 hour, 8 miles per hour, females 6.5 miles per hour.

Jack: But the fastest human ever, some dude called Bolt. And he hit 27 miles per hour.

Cristina: 27 miles per hour.

Jack: That's a colossal difference between the average and this guy.

Cristina: Yes.

Jack: And that being said, he will still get cracked on by that.

Cristina: The ostrich.

Jack: By the ostrich.

Cristina: Yeah. Yeah.

Jack: This is way faster than I thought it was. And still the ostrich is winning. Yeah, by like quite a bit. The ostrich will get some car lengths on this person. I'm the fastest human ever. But that ain't crap because like there's a bunch of crazy fast animals like a gazelle. A Gazelle could hit 60 miles per hour.

Cristina: 60 miles per hour just running.

Jack: Sprint into 60 miles per hour.

Cristina: How much would that hurt if that ran into you?

Jack: Probably a lot. Like, I'm sure these things have totaled cars in the past.

Cristina: Whoa. That's crazy. That's pretty fast.

Jack: Also, gazelles are the most elegant of the deer, right?

Cristina: Yes.

Jack: They Look. Beautiful. They're like the cat of the deer.

Cristina: Yes, I think so. They're not the biggest or smallest deer, are they?

Jack: No, they're like somewhere in the middle. They're the most deer sized of the deer.

Cristina: I bet if we find the smallest deer, it'd be the cutest deer.

Jack: It microdeers.

Cristina: A micro deer. What if there is a micro deer?

Jack: There's probably such a thing as a micro deer. This is micro everything at this point.

Cristina: Ah, so cute. It's so ridiculously dumb looking.

Jack: Yeah, it looks like kind of like a. It's the pug of the deer.

Cristina: It is so cute. It is too cute. I don't even know how you say its name. Pudu.

Jack: It looks so innocent.

Cristina: It looks so innocent. Oh my gosh. Look at this one with his tongue sticking out. Look at this one. That looks so crazy. That does not look real. What? What?

Jack: Weird. Weird.

Cristina: They have horns. Look at those horns. It doesn't look real.

Jack: Tiny little horns.

Cristina: Yes.

Jack: And that's just a micro deer.

Cristina: Yeah, but not as elegant as. What was the deer that we were talking about?

Jack: The gazelle.

Cristina: The gazelle? No, the gazelle.

Jack: Yeah. Well, the gazelle is incredibly fast. But the gazelle is not the fastest animal yet. That would be the cheetah. Actually. That's wrong. But that's. We're talking land animals.

Cristina: Oh, okay.

Jack: Because the cheetah could hit like 70 miles per hour.

Cristina: Mm.

Jack: Think about how much faster than the gazelle that is. That's a whole 10 miles per hour on it.

Cristina: That is ridiculous.

Jack: That's like a. That's a nice close race basically.

Cristina: Right.

Jack: Like the gazelle's getting away, but slowly the cheetahs catching them.

Cristina: And it does.

Jack: It does.

Cristina: Okay, better. But what's the fastest animal?

Jack: Well, faster than the cheetah is.

Cristina: Is there a bird?

Jack: The golden eagle.

Cristina: Oh my gosh. I was gonna say.

Jack: Yeah. The golden Eagle does about 200 miles per hour.

Cristina: How?

Jack: Flight, man.

Cristina: What was it?

Jack: The advantages of gravity?

Cristina: The golden eagle, 200 miles per hour. Whoa. It makes sense that a bird would be very fast. Like.

Jack: Yeah, right. Because you're in the sky, you have way less resistance in water or the treacherous energy cost of like propelling yourself forward on ground.

Cristina: That is so ridiculous. What? Is there something faster?

Jack: There is a bird that's faster than that bird yet.

Cristina: Faster by much?

Jack: No, by a significant amount.

Cristina: Really? Yeah.

Jack: So the peregrine falcon does 240 mph. That eagle couldn't pretend it could catch this bird.

Cristina: Well, do you know the size comparison to these birds?

Jack: No, I do not.

Cristina: But the golden eagle is bigger. It's 2 to 7 to 33 inches, while the falcon is 14 to 19 inches. And that falcon is one of the largest falcons in North America. Well, I guess in North America. That doesn't help. That doesn't help.

Jack: North America is huge, though.

Cristina: So I'm gonna say the golden eagle wins.

Jack: What? In size? Yeah, yeah, it's like. What is it, two? The falcon is two thirds the size of the eagle.

Cristina: Okay, but. And the eagle is faster, right?

Jack: No, no, the falcon is faster than the eagle. Yeah, the falcon has 40 miles per hour on the eagle.

Cristina: Oh, my gosh.

Jack: So that size is, like, beneficial. Now, do you know what the smartest animals are?

Cristina: Human. Human. I don't know.

Jack: Yeah, we have to be. Right. Like, that's default. Humans are the. As far as we know, until we can bridge communication with dolphins, we'll never know.

Cristina: Dolphins have to be up there.

Jack: I'm pretty sure they're second place. I'm convinced. You think jellyfish are like gods?

Cristina: There's nothing going on in a jellyfish.

Jack: The. The ocean spirit.

Cristina: The ocean spirit. Oh, it does have that view.

Jack: I guess the glowing ones do.

Cristina: Yeah, that's pretty cool. But the smartest.

Jack: Yeah, I mean, there's some obvious winners.

Cristina: Like what?

Jack: Like an elephant?

Cristina: Like an elephant. Yes, for sure. And I guess a hippo. Are they or are they just vicious?

Jack: Well, they categorize under pigs, and pigs are highly intelligent.

Cristina: Oh. Spiders seem pretty smart.

Jack: Spiders. intellect is hard to judge in a spider.

Jack: Definitely nothing notable.

Cristina: Nothing notable.

Jack: Nothing notable.

Cristina: Are other monkeys as smart as this?

Jack: Yes. Chimpanzees. I mean, not as smart as smart. Chimpanzees are pretty smart. They're up there.

Cristina: They're up there.

Jack: Yeah. They're some of the smartest animals. If not the smartest animals, there's an.

Cristina: Animal that can fight a snake. I feel like they might be really smart. I don't know.

Jack: An animal that could fight a snake.

Cristina: Yeah, like a poisonous snake. Like it's become immune to the poison.

Jack: The mongoose.

Cristina: Is it a mongoose? Maybe it's not. Maybe it's just vicious. Vicious and smart are not the same, are they?

Jack: Yeah, no, it fights them because it's immune to the snake's venom or something.

Cristina: Yeah, but how did it become immune? It's gotta have lost a long time.

Jack: There was a crazy war with an absurd body count.

Cristina: Yeah, but does that make it smart?

Jack: No, it makes sense.

Cristina: Because it adapted.

Jack: No, that's just natural. Selection.

Cristina: Okay.

Jack: If the snakes were gonna be a problem, only the ones who wouldn't have a problem with the snake would survive.

Cristina: You think snakes are smart?

Jack: Depends on the snake. And also reptiles seem to have a lack of reasoning. There's no like puzzles, like there's no amazing puzzle solving. Reptile. No, but there's something about a reptile that seems illogical, entirely instinctive. Thus cold hearted or cold blooded?

Cristina: Cold blooded. What do you mean illogical?

Jack: Yeah, they seem, they don't, there's, there's no gears turning, I guess, but I.

Cristina: Feel like they don't need gears turning because they've adapted it so well that like everything is easy for them. They figured out life, I suppose.

Jack: Well, not really. That's. They need to be around water because they, they're so primitive. Their body doesn't even regulate heat properly.

Cristina: Are alligators counted as that?

Jack: Yeah, yeah.

Cristina: Like, come on, they, they got an easy life. They look very happy. They don't look happy.

Jack: I don't think they could tell. Happiness.

Cristina: Yeah.

Jack: It's probably real basic functions going on, like pain, pleasure, hunger, just basic things.

Cristina: So that wouldn't be intelligent.

Jack: Yeah, I don't think it would fall under like intelligent bees. No. But parrots.

Cristina: Parrots. Okay.

Jack: And crows, like ravens.

Cristina: Of course. Ravens.

Jack: And yeah. Actually out of the birds, ravens are at the top.

Cristina: But they're not number one. Out of the birds there they are number one. Okay. Do you think ants are intelligent?

Jack: Yeah, I think ants are a complicated thing because they, they have a collective.

Cristina: Mind, so you can't really count that.

Jack: Yeah. Cuz not like one ant won't get anything accomplished. No, but government goes a long way and ants have government and they could.

Cristina: Like, they can make crazy decisions together and stuff.

Jack: Yeah, they're unity. Yeah, it's communism. Well, it's a dictatorship and it is communism. Actually, it's both. Yeah. Oh, wow, that's weird. Ants live in communist societies, as do bees.

Cristina: They're living the same lives pretty much.

Jack: Well, actually, I think in both those cases those are fascist societies in which a small percent get the majority of the goods and make all the decisions.

Cristina: Yes, one.

Jack: Yeah, those are, Are those fascists?

Cristina: Buffaloes are pretty smart.

Jack: Buffaloes, yeah.

Cristina: Do you know the African buffaloes can practice democracy? They practice voting. They vote on things, man.

Jack: Like what?

Cristina: like on where to go and stuff. Like the adult females get together and like, I guess there's physical cues. Like they might all like look at one way and the others look at that way and then, you know, like if there was two roads, they had to choose. They get together and, you know, all faced one way. Then everyone's like, okay, that's the winner.

Jack: Interesting, interesting. I wonder if everybody tried to vote at the same time. They wouldn't see anybody else's vote.

Cristina: Well, it's only the females voting, so the. The rest of the party. The older females. So the rest of the party would be watching to see who wins.

Jack: Oh, interesting.

Cristina: I'm guessing that's how it works.

Jack: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Democracy at play.

Cristina: Yes.

Jack: Fantastic.

Cristina: That's pretty smart.

Jack: Yeah, it's clever. I've heard of that before. Humans can't even figure that out.

Cristina: No. So that's interesting. Although it's just one specifically, we couldn't do that because everyone has to vote. That's the only way.

Jack: Yeah, everybody has to vote. As opposed to just the educated ones. We all don't want to be the dumb ones. That's all it is. Interesting enough, dolphins have an IQ equal to humans.

Cristina: Equal?

Jack: Equal.

Cristina: Like average.

Jack: Yes. So the average IQ is about 100 for humans, and the average IQ for dolphin is about 100. All right, so their intellect is about the same. And this goes into considering the fact that we. Again, we can't figure out the language of these creatures, but we know that they have policing systems and they have debates and they have trolls and they have.

Cristina: They probably have a higher iq. It's impossible to tell.

Jack: I mean, they have the added advantage that they can convey literal imagery to one another, as seen. That's absurd. They could send a sound that's gonna replicate in the head of the other one, all the visuals.

Cristina: How do you beat that?

Jack: That's crazy. That's just an ability that, by default, must make their understanding of navigating through the world more refined than ours.

Cristina: Another thing that they have is almost equal. Not almost equal, but a pretty high EQ, which is emotional intelligence. We're at a 7.4. They're at a 5.3, which is way higher than other animals. I don't know what the list is like of every animal.

Jack: Yeah, but that wouldn't even matter anyways because all we need is, like, the ones up there. Unless there's an animal with more emotional intelligence than a dolphin. But I also don't see how that would be beneficial to survival. It feels like it's something that would get in the way long term.

Cristina: I don't know. I mean, it has to be high for. I'm guessing, animals that have communities. It would be high.

Jack: Why?

Cristina: Because you got to get along with other animals in that community.

Jack: Fair enough. But what if animals are just intellectually gonna follow a hierarchy that establishes itself based on like, power, for example, Then you don't need to care about emotions because there is stability here.

Cristina: That's probably ants and bees.

Jack: Fair enough. Fascism.

Cristina: So I don't know even like wolf packs. That's family. That's the parents leading the pack.

Jack: Interesting. Yes.

Cristina: And even lions, it's the strongest. But there's got to be some emotional bond there too.

Jack: Yeah. And it's still family.

Cristina: Still family, yeah.

Jack: Yeah. A lot of time. Creatures with like the powerful creatures are all very family creatures, so it's.

Cristina: It's gotta help out in some ways. So they're the smartest? Not the smartest. Well, the smartest in the water, definitely.

Jack: Who?

Cristina: Dolphins.

Jack: Dolphins smartest in the water for sure. And I think the smartest on in land has to be the chimpanzee.

Cristina: Besides us.

Jack: Besides us.

Cristina: Okay.

Jack: Other. Other creatures. Other than us. Where obviously our intelligence meter forces all other creatures. Us and dolphins, we just force everything down to the point that it seems uninterrupted. We question consciousness in these creatures from how below us the intellect level up.

Cristina: And the smartest bird is like nothing compared to the smartest mammal.

Jack: Oh, no, that's a. That's a crazy gap. Yes. The smartest bird. We would crap on the smartest bird.

Cristina: Yeah.

Jack: The smartest bird is like a raven or something. And the IQ of a raven is still not like an absurdly high iq.

Cristina: We compare that to children or something.

Jack: Yeah. Do you know what the most dangerous animals are besides the hill?

Cristina: Is that a trick question? Human, probably.

Jack: Humans should definitely be up there.

Cristina: That's.

Jack: That's mainly about how many murders happen. Yeah, but it's crazy because, okay, we would calculate something dangerous based on how many times it kills a human. That's how we calculate danger. How much. Which is. I guess every animal thinks like that, right? Things are dangerous if they hurt my species.

Cristina: So if we do, we don't count just us. What about. There's that bug. It destroys everything in its sights. It's in the Bible.

Jack: Locust.

Cristina: Locust, yes. Come on. That's dangerous.

Jack: But I don't think it has direct body count. I think what it does affects people.

Cristina: Yes, but I'm not talking about what it does to people. It's destroys plants, those lives dead. Like it's destroying everything in its way. All the food. Yeah, in that area, yeah.

Jack: Interesting way to consider body count. Yeah, but what about things with blood count? Anything with blood is the only thing we can. Mosquitoes. H*** yes. For a fact, mosquitoes are number one. They're the kingpin of murder.

Cristina: Really? Yes. Because they carry mad diseases and then they're just spreading it while they're drinking from you. Is that what's happening?

Jack: Yeah, to some degree. Mosquitoes are by far. They're huge. They're up there with about a million deaths by mosquito per year.

Cristina: That makes sense. And it's all just from like something so simple, like you don't even see it coming.

Jack: Nope.

Cristina: You just feel it and it's not even painful. It's the least painful death.

Jack: I'm guessing a random little oh, wow, that was annoying.

Cristina: Or a little buzz and then you're.

Jack: Just dead before you know it.

Cristina: Yes.

Jack: Million a year.

Cristina: A million. Do they kill animals too?

Jack: Yeah, probably. There's a bunch of different types of mosquitoes, I'm sure.

Cristina: So is that the deadliest creature alive or just one of the deadliest?

Jack: That's the deadliest. But there's a bunch of other options going on too. Snakes are pretty up there. They got about 100,000 deaths a year.

Cristina: Is it all types of snakes?

Jack: Yes, otherwise I would specify.

Cristina: Oh, okay.

Jack: It's just the general.

Cristina: Alright. Because they all kill in such different ways.

Jack: Yes. But if you're like the black mamba, the most dangerous thing, probably, you know, like three people a year or some crap.

Cristina: Okay.

Jack: You know, you just generalize it. But like we would have very different numbers if we were just talking about mosquitoes as well and specify it on any type of mosquito. Because it'd be like, well, mosquitoes, they have this very specific kind of thing going on as opposed to the ones that are responsible for. But I guess a lot of mosquitoes aren't even responsible again, because it's. They affect people with how they do.

Cristina: Yeah.

Jack: This person has this thing, bit them, I took it to that person, gave it to them, that person dies. We're blame the mosquito. Those amount of deaths probably make up a lot of them.

Cristina: Yes, yes. That's a lot.

Jack: Yeah.

Cristina: But when it comes to snakes, it's a whole different thing going on.

Jack: Yeah, they're actively attacking and that's 100,000.

Cristina: 100,000. What was the mosquito again? Million.

Jack: A million.

Cristina: Whoa. What numbers.

Jack: Crazy leap, right? Mosquitoes take 10 times the lives that snakes do.

Cristina: Is there like the most dangerous sea animal?

Jack: The most dangerous sea animal. That's probably just a dolphin and you're.

Cristina: And okay, so the snake is the most dangerous. The second one is the snake. Right after you said that.

Jack: Twice.

Cristina: Oh, the mosquito. The mosquitoes are most dangerous. Then it's the snake.

Jack: Yes.

Cristina: Then what comes after that?

Jack: Dogs. What dogs have 30,000 kills?

Cristina: More than, like, wolves, dogs? Like pets?

Jack: No, all dogs. These are generalizations.

Cristina: Lame list. Okay.

Jack: If it was just wolves, it would be like five a year, I guess.

Cristina: But, like, what are they considering how they're being killed? Like, are these dogs with, like, the rabies kill?

Jack: No, I'm sure it's like a dog murdering a person.

Cristina: These are human deaths.

Jack: Yeah, Everything is calculated by how many humans they kill.

Cristina: Oh, okay. Oh, there's probably dogs killing their owners, though.

Jack: Yeah. There's so many dogs. There's billions of people. Definitely. But now, being dangerous and having a huge body count doesn't mean being the most dangerous, really. It just means things that could mess you up and don't are kind.

Cristina: What do you mean?

Jack: Some animals got quite like a body weight on the dangerous animals. So, yeah, something might have a crazy high body count, like a mosquito, but something really, really big could eat millions and trillions of mosquitoes all at the same time. You know, I guess, like, look at the size of this bear.

Cristina: That's a huge bear.

Jack: That's a grizzly bear.

Cristina: Grizzly bear. Probably not the killer like the mosquito. No, no, but it's huge.

Jack: It's ridiculous.

Cristina: I think polar bears are also really big bears.

Jack: Yeah. The small bears are the black bears.

Cristina: That's ridiculous.

Jack: But this, this is huge. This is two humans. But it's still kind of nothing when you consider the size of the blue.

Cristina: Whale the largest animal.

Jack: The largest animal ever. I was looking at this and, like, I'm like, yeah, largest animal alive. And I look online to make sure and it's like, it's the largest animal to have ever been recorded in any period of time. There's no dinosaur that was larger. What little dinosaur, the largest creature ever recorded in all of time exists at this moment. And we're from. Well, to some degree familiar with it.

Cristina: Yes.

Jack: Yeah.

Cristina: The giant creature that, like, only eats planktons or something.

Jack: Yep. The blue whale, the largest creature ever recorded.

Cristina: Why is it so large?

Jack: I don't know.

Cristina: How large is it?

Jack: Almost a hundred feet long.

Cristina: How. How many buses is that?

Jack: That's a really good question. Those are school buses. Okay. It looks like almost three school buses. No, it's two and a half. Right?

Cristina: Two and a half.

Jack: Yeah, it's two and a half school buses. Long.

Cristina: Well, the biggest they've ever recorded of the blue rare. Like, I'm guessing that's the Average.

Jack: Oh, yeah. So the average is about two school.

Cristina: Buses worth, but the biggest we've ever recorded.

Jack: Yes.

Cristina: Whoa.

Jack: And like, this is the most massive animal because also weight. You get my point.

Cristina: Yeah.

Jack: We also, like, counts in here because it's 400. It's over, actually. Over £400,000.

Cristina: Is there even any animal close to that weight?

Jack: No.

Cristina: That's so crazy.

Jack: I think the next heaviest thing is the elephant.

Cristina: Okay.

Jack: And the elephant just comes in at £13,000, next to £400,000.

Cristina: Wow. It's so long. It's so big. So it's a record breaking animal in many ways.

Jack: Yeah, in almost all the ways.

Cristina: Wow. It's so big. How is there more than one of those things in the ocean?

Jack: That's how big the ocean is. The ocean is so freaking huge, it's rare to see one.

Cristina: Well, is it really? That's crazy.

Jack: They're so huge and the ocean goes so deep and it's still incredibly shallow, next to, like, the depths of earth.

Cristina: But blue whales aren't hanging out down there, are they?

Jack: I wonder. I wonder how. I mean, blue whales are relatively safe creatures. There isn't anything. They have no predators.

Cristina: Are you sure?

Jack: You think they have. You think there's something out there killing blue whales?

Cristina: Dolphins, yeah.

Jack: My bed is dolphins.

Cristina: Wasn't it the orca or something?

Jack: They kill blue whales.

Cristina: Baby ones, probably.

Jack: That's fair. That sounds like the animal kingdom to me.

Cristina: All right, so it's a pack of orcas and they can only prey on the little ones.

Jack: So, like, an adult blue whale is good.

Cristina: Yeah, yeah.

Jack: And it's crazy because for a baby, it still takes a bunch of them.

Cristina: Yes. So these large pack of them.

Jack: Yeah. The killer whale. The orca is a dolphin.

Cristina: Mm.

Jack: That name is confusing, though, because it's not a whale.

Cristina: Is a dolphin just a whale?

Jack: No, no, a dolphin isn't a whale.

Cristina: A dolphin is a whale.

Jack: How is a dolphin a whale?

Cristina: They're part of the same family. I don't know how to pronounce it. Cetaceans.

Jack: Norwell, that's a. Yeah, but if they're both part of that family, then they're both cetaceans. Not both whales or dolphins. One is a whale and one is a dolphin. And all whales aren't dolphins. And all dolphins aren't whales. But they're all cetaceans.

Cristina: Are all. I mean, dolphins. Are you sure? Dolphins are not whales, but.

Jack: No, they're not in the same family.

Cristina: They're not?

Jack: No.

Cristina: So they're related.

Jack: Whales don't have teeth. Dolphins do. That's the difference.

Cristina: But the giant, the giant whale, the blue whale has teeth.

Jack: The blue whale doesn't have teeth.

Cristina: Yes, it does.

Jack: No, the blue whale doesn't have teeth.

Cristina: It doesn't?

Jack: No.

Cristina: I read that they have a bunch of teeth.

Jack: They have some equivalent, but they don't have teeth.

Cristina: Oh, I guess they don't have teeth.

Jack: No, they're not dolphins. Dolphins have teeth.

Cristina: Okay.

Jack: They're both the same thing, except some are toothed whales and others are non toothed whales. And toothed whales are.

Cristina: Dolphins are monsters. Okay. While non toothed whales are gentle.

Jack: It's crazy that, man, there's something wrong with dolphins. It's crazy that these like the bigger dolphins are out here hunting whales to begin with. Although they would get bodied by the full sized whale.

Cristina: Definitely. That thing is huge. It could eat, like if it could eat, how many of them could it eat?

Jack: It could just eat its enemies in one shot.

Cristina: Oh, that's the biggest thing on earth. Well, living thing.

Jack: Yep. I mean, look at its size. That's a boat down there with people, with a bunch of people. And that whale is like three times the size of that boat.

Cristina: Yeah. That's amazing being next to that thing. What?

Jack: Yeah, it's crazy huge.

Cristina: Wow. Well, those are a bunch of animals next to it.

Jack: Yeah, next to the blue whale. Look at the killer whale, how small it is as compared to the blue whale.

Cristina: Yeah. And that dinosaur with a long neck. How big was that thing?

Jack: Well, based on this size, not too crazy. It was definitely just about taller than the mammoth. And the mammoth was about 14ft. So this was from the shoulders about 17, 18ft tall.

Cristina: Well, that beats a giraffe, right? How tall does the giraffe get?

Jack: I don't know.

Cristina: The giraffe gets 16 to 19 inches tall. Inches. Feet, Sorry, feet tall. That'd be crazy. This is the world's smallest giraffe. That is 16 and 19. That has to be the tallest creature, right?

Jack: Yeah, Tall, but not the most massive, but yes, definitely the tallest.

Cristina: Yes.

Jack: But its height is nothing compared to the whale's length.

Cristina: No. It's hard to imagine. There's not many things. You can't compare any animals. It's probably like. What was it again, the length? 100ft.

Jack: Yeah.

Cristina: That's a lot of giraffes. That's 20 giraffes on top of each other.

Jack: Just looking at the size comparison, it's crazy that the mammoth was still taller than the T. Rex. Like we think of the T. Rex way bigger than it really is. Because I guess we pictured the T. Rex a lot like Jurassic park tried to show us. It looked like. Yeah, but no, it's way smaller than that.

Cristina: But the T. Rex wasn't the biggest carnivore dinosaur either.

Jack: No, there's probably bigger badder ones. There's just some advantage. Maybe it wasn't even a successful one. For whatever reason, humans just have an.

Cristina: Obsession with it because of its ridiculous tiny.

Jack: Well no, people think it's cool. Oh, T. Rexes are cool. They're so edgy.

Cristina: I don't get why kangaroos aren't cool like that.

Jack: Kangaroos aren't cool at all. People laugh at kangaroos. They think they're buff, buff dummies.

Cristina: But they also have tiny tiny T. Rex arms. T. Rex arms. But they have the ability to like hop very far, I think.

Jack: Yes.

Cristina: So that beats a T. Rex.

Jack: Maybe a T. Rex could jump really far too.

Cristina: That would be insane.

Jack: What if one is the natural evolution of the other?

Cristina: A T. Rex to a kangaroo?

Jack: Yeah.

Cristina: Well, I don't know anywho.

Jack: Definitely. As we discussed last week, I guess the blue whale was our conclusion before it was the largest, right? Yeah, but the elephant is also like land wise the most massive. Even if the whale will body an elephant overall.

Cristina: But we didn't talk about the most dangerous or we talked about like.

Jack: No, the literal most dangerous is the mosquito and then the snake.

Cristina: Pretty crazy.

Jack: And all those tiny animals, little fuzzy tiny thingies. Which two of our primates.

Cristina: Mm. We learned a lot about animals this week. More than last week.

Jack: Yes, because last week it was the power of Google. Now we went in a little further which ended up in the same conclusion. That blue whales are the champions of size and definitely mass and probably power, all things considered. Effortlessly.

Cristina: Yes. And what was the fastest friggin bird?

Jack: It was a hawk or. No, it was a falcon that goes 240 miles per hour.

Cristina: Wait, did we talk about what water animal goes the fastest?

Jack: No.

Cristina: Do you know?

Jack: No.

Cristina: Oh no. Okay.

Jack: We have no idea. But anyways, if you guys enjoyed finding out about these animals, you can find out the conversation that promoted this in the first place, which was last week when we were just googling animals. So you can go check that out and I guess posts, I guess follows look primarily just follow social medias. You know you can find us on Twitter and Facebook and Instagram, usconvopod.

Cristina: Remember to subscribe, rate and review the show.

Jack: Yeah, reviews are amazing. Leave us some.

Cristina: And that someone who might like this.

Jack: Show know about it, word of mouth. Always. Great. Tell people about the show and they will come and listen with you.

Cristina: Yes. This has been the Rambling podcast. Take nothing personal and thanks for listening.

Jack: Bye.

Cristina: Do they have flat earth? There's.

Jack: Yeah.

Cristina: That makes it sound like they're like, I don't know, type of alien. Like there's regular earth, there's. And then there's the flat earthers. Like they look flat or something.

Jack: Oh, yeah, Yeah, I see what you mean. But now. So, yeah, that's how Martin Luther King are related. Is related to penguins.

Cristina: Yes.

Jack: Because of that one interesting incident. Only because penguins. Could civil rights laws be passed in the first place.

Cristina: That's crazy.

Jack: Yeah. Penguins allowing the message to get across. After Linden Johnson talked to the penguins, telling them what message needed to be delivered and then being like, okay, we agree this message should get across, but.

Cristina: How many other things were penguins involved with?

Jack: Anything that involves the wall. Yeah, whatever that would be. Whatever somebody going through the wall would be that you interact with penguins.

Cristina: But is then this one the biggest thing that they're involved with and that's why their holiday is right next to it?

Jack: Probably not. There's probably bigger things because why would.

Cristina: They pick that day, though?

Jack: Who picked it?

Cristina: I don't know.

Jack: Whoever picked it assume it happened at random.

Cristina: They just picked a random date for them. Good morning. Good morning. The podcast is hosted by Christina Collazo and Jack Thomas, produced by Lynn Taylor and published by greatthoughts.info art by Zero Lupo and logo by Seth McCallister with social media managed by Amber Black.