Total Mess


A twenty story drop is no joke.
Heart stops before hitting the ground.
Jerkoff’s off to a picture of himself before jumping.
With a ten story rope around his neck.
For the audience.
Why? Because it doesn’t matter.

Death embodies little hotties that you meet in druggie parties.
But two to the head quickly shuts that party down.
Because who the fuck are you and how’d you get into the party?

Meanwhile, some maniac is jumping out a building window.

Two homeless men walk into a bar.
They broke in…
Anyway, one homeless man tells the other,
“I found a head on the sidewalk!”

Hookers run out of a basement.

Limpdick photo with the power of levitation.
Flies weird.
Heavy on one side.
Carrying the children to safety.

The meat festival.
Let’s throw confetti.
We only have meat.

Is Rapunzel a redhead or am I seeing things?
Why’s this dumb bitch putting her hair all up in other people’s apartment windows, anyway?

Cardboard citizens run from rain.
They’re scared they’ll dissolve!

This Just In!
Breaking News!
One John Doe found dead in Eddie’s Pub.
Evidence says an abduction took place, too.

This just in!
American drug kingpin killed yesterday.
A gruesome display suspected to be the work of gangsters.

It’s a conspiracy, man!
They don’t want the peace!
The government did it!
Big bro, bro!
They want to stop the weed, dude!