Rambling 255: Santa Clause Details
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What exactly is Santa Claus? What is the extent of his abilities, and what is his ultimate goal? The duo unpack, one more, the complex and winding tale of Santa Claus with all gathered information throughout the years. Every year it's changed and every year the man in red has become more terrifying.
Episode Details+
- Santa Claus
- Reindeer
- Unicorns
- Adrenochrome
- Elysians
- Saint Nicolas
- Philosopher’s Stone
- Technology
- Gnomes
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+Transcript
Cristina: Warning. This program contains strong themes meant for a mature audience. Discretion is advised.
Jack: Going live in 5, 4.
Cristina: What does live mean?
Jack: Welcome to the Rampant Podcast. I'm your host, Jack.
Cristina: And I'm your host, Christina.
Jack: And this is the show where we ground humanity's most absurd and baffling ideas. And like, recently I've been thinking about the fact that it's gonna be Christmas soon and the fact that now that we required a lot more information. Who exactly is Santa? Once we've truly and honestly applied what we found out. Because it seems like out of all the creatures, out of all the people, out of all the beings, out of all the everything intelligent or not, that we've come across the most overpowered of them all. If Santa.
Cristina: The leader of elves.
Jack: The leader of elves and I don't know what this is about. It's absolutely crazy. You don't think he's an elf?
Cristina: No.
Jack: Why?
Cristina: He's too Jesus. Like, hey, he was made from the philosopher's stone too.
Jack: You think he was. You think he's like Jesus or King Arthur or Joseph?
Cristina: Yeah. Is that too crazy? I don't know.
Jack: I don't know.
Cristina: I don't know.
Jack: I don't know. This, this guy has always been so difficult to pin down. And, you know, we once in a while unpack what we're familiar with, but it's still really complicated and we're not sure what it is.
Cristina: What's his goal?
Jack: Like, what's his goal? What he really is. We have guesses, we know of people. There's a lot of loose connections. But now we have a lot more information about this higher tier level of advanced civilization. And if he fits into any of these groups, at least the. Not tier 3 or 4 at most. I'm guessing, like tier 2, right? Some like star level energy.
Cristina: Talking about the sea people.
Jack: No, I'm talking about. Oh, I haven't even mentioned. I'm talking about Santa Claus. I believe that Santa Claus fits into our tier scale of. Well, not our tier scale, but the Kardashev scale, about the level of a civilization where they're a higher level. When they're, you know, it's like you.
Cristina: Think he's by himself.
Jack: I don't think he's by himself. I believe that. Well, I'll tell you what I believe in a moment, actually. First of all, let's unpack what we believe about or not believe what we know about Santa.
Cristina: Okay.
Jack: What are the things that we believe? We know because once we establish those things, we have a lot of technology, a Lot of advanced civilizations all kind of branching out of exactly the same time to compare to now. We just need to know what we're starting with. What are the building blocks? So what do we know about Santa? What have we discussed in the past? Let's go through that briefly. Okay, so what do you remember about him? What are things we know for back saved.
Cristina: He resurrected some children.
Jack: Yeah, that's f****** mouths.
Cristina: That's very Jesus. And I know he goes around the world in a day to every single house.
Jack: What are some of his abilities?
Cristina: I don't know if that's teleportation or time travel or a little bit of both.
Jack: I think if it is not teleportation, then he has such an over exaggerated.
Cristina: Speed course for sure.
Jack: Yeah. He has such an exaggerated level of time control that what would take somebody years to accomplish, he successfully manages to accomplish in what to us feels like a night, but presumably to him was a year or many years. Like the. I. I think if that's the case, there's definitely a ratio going on. Right?
Cristina: What?
Jack: Where it'll be like we experience 364 days of a year and then he experiences those same 364 days. But then in one day he would have to experience like 30 years.
Cristina: No.
Jack: Because he slows down time.
Cristina: Oh, I guess. No, I don't think so. I think it's more about travel. You know what? Because of what we have learned, I'm thinking that he is using teleportation. I think he's going into. Because of the elves. Like he works with elves. Come on.
Jack: They have to be dropping it off, right?
Cristina: He knows all the places to sneak through all these portals. Elves have natural portals everywhere. I think you could be using those.
Jack: They don't have not. They don't need portals or fairies. They can pop in and out. I never thought about them.
Cristina: No, they have their own portal. I mean they have their own space that they travel through. They don't pop in and out. They're going through this thing.
Jack: They're going through the. Through Elfame.
Cristina: Exactly. He's going through Elfain.
Jack: He doesn't need to go through anything. But we already. Oh my God. I see all the lines you're connecting now. It took me a second. We just established this recently. Either last week or the week before that.
Cristina: Last week. Because I think the sea people have figured it out by using shadow technology.
Jack: Who was it? Who was it? Who were we talking about? Who are we talking about? Who established a portal through a top. It was the necromancers yes.
Cristina: Yes. He's using their tech.
Jack: Yeah.
Cristina: These necromancers are not just necromancers. They are. They're just. I think they're just sea people, aren't they?
Jack: No. No.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: Necromancers don't have to be sea people.
Cristina: They definitely are.
Jack: Why do you believe they're sea people?
Cristina: Because there's no one. No way. The technology that they have is too ridiculous. Because it's a combination of everything. A sea people, shadow realm, and very.
Jack: I mean, I think the conclusion of that episode was ultimately that they might as well be exact. Like, we don't know that for a fact. Again, that's like a. That's a good conclusion.
Cristina: Unless you know any humans that became one or got taught by one of these. Actually. No way. No way.
Jack: Anyways, so I came in to the thought of Santa trying to answer some pretty basic questions about him, which are, who is Santa Claus? What is Santa Claus? And what is Santa Claus's goal? Like, what is he doing? Right? We have ideas. We have, like, what he's doing. We have ideas of what he's doing. We have ideas of who he is, we have ideas of what his goal, not his ultimate goal, but we know, like, at least what he's trying to accomplish in some aspects. But with the information we have, if we crack open this case, go balls to the wall with it, what do we find? Right? Because then trying to answer those questions, the only real things we need to look at are the things that stick out about Santa Claus, right? The things we're familiar with, kind of. And it goes as follows. Like, is Santa Claus and Elysian himself?
Cristina: Probably, I think. Why do you think he has their powers?
Jack: You think that's the case?
Cristina: He's either one or he's either a.
Jack: Thing they made interesting, like Jesus or King Arthur.
Cristina: Okay.
Jack: Then we have weird things, like, does he use adrenochrome? Because why does it need fear?
Cristina: Okay.
Jack: You know?
Jack: Like, what is that about?
Cristina: I don't know. Jesus also feels like he needs fuel, too.
Jack: It kind of leans in that direction a little. Right?
Cristina: I guess that will still make him more like Jesus for some reason. But I don't understand.
Jack: How does Santa know everything? But Jesus kind of knows a lot too.
Cristina: It's the same. It's a special ability these type of things have.
Jack: You think Yosef had it too?
Cristina: Who?
Jack: Yosef, the golem.
Cristina: Except for him, because he wasn't given free will.
Jack: He did have free will. The problem is you could still deactivate him, which is f*****.
Cristina: Oh, yeah, Yeah. I don't know. I don't think he could tell because then he'd probably kill those people. I don't know. Why would he be okay with them.
Jack: Deactivating him and the king? King Arthur didn't know everything.
Cristina: No, not even the more you they.
Jack: I think. But okay, here's the thing. Here's the thing. What you gotta. Oh, I think we have a word for this already. The homunculus. They're artificial humans. They're homunculus. And the problem is Jesus was a fully normal thinking homunculus. As close to perfect as possible. But Arthur was intentionally lacking that super expanded knowledge. Intentionally, it seems. And then let's build a narrative that he'll follow instead of just giving him the knowledge he'll need to just know to do it. Because when we did that, they went rogue. How does Merlin know that? Maybe connected to the Alicians in some way. He is in fact half human, half shadow. Or was he half Elysian, half shadow?
Cristina: I can't. No, he was.
Jack: I think he was human. He was Alician.
Cristina: Merlin.
Jack: Merlin. Half Alician, half. Okay, fair enough. Op crap like that anyways. But back to Santa. What are the things we know? What stands out that's really weird about this guy?
Cristina: Besides, like you said, he knows.
Jack: He knows everything.
Cristina: But he doesn't know everything. I mean, they say he knows who's onion ice, but that's more about the fear, not about him actually knowing.
Jack: Oh, I never made that connection. Oh, that's good.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: So he's just detecting. If you're scared, it's because you're guilty of not having been nice. But if you are nice, he can't detect that because all he was really detecting is fear. Now if that's the case, he can only detect it when it's nearby because he's not just knowing everything. So he gets to your house and then he leaves the thing, but he's not leaving the thing. That's part of the story. That he successfully managed to get a society that goes ahead and gifts themselves and says it's this guy, but then still generates a fear from children, which is the most optimal fear. He somehow got parents unknowingly involved in the process of getting fear, but nobody's getting harmed.
Cristina: He probably doesn't need to know who's. That ain't nice though. He just needs you to think.
Jack: He just needs you to think. Yeah. This could all be for all.
Cristina: Maybe.
Jack: What else do I know?
Cristina: The reindeers.
Jack: What about the reindeers? Reindeer stand out.
Cristina: They fly.
Jack: Flying reindeer Yes.
Cristina: I don't know. Alicians have creatures.
Jack: But do reindeer do the. Without talking about Elysian, what are the characteristics of these reindeer? Specifically, what are features? Without comparing them to anything else. It just exists exclusively for these things. With the Santa Claus stand with. What do these reindeers stand with? The fact that they can fly. What the h*** is up with Rudolph? What the is Rudolph? What is Rudolph glow? He's a radiating reindeer. The h*** is that? That's unnatural. As they fly. That's weird. And they're reindeer. And out of all the vehicles he can have.
Cristina: It's a sleigh.
Jack: It's a sleigh. Now allow me to establish some time here.
Cristina: Okay.
Jack: The sleigh leans into a Roman style kind of medieval wagon thing that you get dragged in. What are those called? You know, that they used to have for war and s***.
Cristina: Chariots.
Jack: Chariots. It resembles a chariot. It's a lot like a chariot. The gap of time between when chariots were common and this m*********** being on a sleigh is colossal. So definitely old habits at play.
Cristina: Do you know how old he is? Is he older than Jesus?
Jack: I don't know. It's unclear.
Cristina: So.
Jack: Okay, allow me to open the case of Santa Claus. Santa Claus? Yeah. So things we know for a fact. Is Santa Claus an elation? We don't know. We gotta try to answer that s***. Reindeer. Definitely resembling some familiar things we've come across. Does this man use adrenochrome? There's a lot weird about that. Thus turning adrenochrome into a power boost of some sort. Because he's using that to perform whatever the f***. But also the elves. What's up with that?
Cristina: What's up with that?
Jack: What's up with that? Okay, let's establish some really basic things. Elves. They're not elves. They're obviously gnomes. We know who the elves are. I don't know how this got confused. Elves and gnomes, very different things. The people helping Santa Claus are gnomes. They are not elves.
Cristina: Are they not from the fairy world? Or are you saying they're shadow creatures?
Jack: Gnomes are all. Are fairies.
Cristina: Okay then.
Jack: But they're not elves.
Cristina: Whatever.
Jack: They are not elves. They are fairies.
Cristina: They are fairies.
Jack: For whatever reason the world calls them elves.
Cristina: Doesn't matter. They're still from the fairy world.
Jack: This is not how that works. If anything, they're Elfamers. But we don't need to say that because they're fae. AKA fairies. That's what you would say to Earthling. Okay, It's Kind of like no matter who you were on Earth, if people were like, oh, they're Chinese. Well, whatever. They're all from the planet where China's on. They're all Chinese. That's essentially what you're doing here.
Cristina: I don't get it.
Jack: Because China being just a country and elves being just, I guess, Chinese people being a ethnic group and elves being an ethnic group, and then labeling anybody from the location they're from, elves or Chinese is the same. There's no difference there. So by saying that the gnomes, an entirely different race, is an elf instead of a fairy, it's like you saying we are Chinese, not human.
Cristina: Okay, but how is that important?
Jack: No, I'm just saying.
Cristina: Okay, that.
Jack: That is, we must make clear distinctions in those definitions so not be confusing when we communicate.
Cristina: Okay, those gnomes that we call elves.
Jack: Yes, they are gnomes. And because we know that the fairy that the elves are actually trying to suppress the level of technology around particularly advanced individuals. And that is number one as to why these individuals are specifically the opposite of an elf. Okay, because they're actually assisting in this colossal power shift that exists with this individual as opposed to preventing it from happening. But do you know why we're gonna get to that? First thing I notice that's really interesting is a giant power level and no Naga. I looked. There's no snake associated with this individual that tells us a single obvious thing. Let's look at the facts that we're familiar with when it comes to an advanced civilization, when it comes to the Naga, and when it comes to elves. This is why this definition makes a lot of importance as we're talking about elves. It's important that we know the gnomes are not who we're communicating with. Because right now we have to point out the fact that there are no elves around Santa.
Cristina: Okay.
Jack: Which means he's off radar to being stopped. There is no Naga, because where are you sending them if you don't know how to find this guy? These are signs that he's rogue, he's overpowered, and must be working with a group that is unassociated. So that's where the gnomes come in. He has connections directly to Elfame. Somehow. Somehow.
Cristina: But why?
Jack: I don't know. Okay, we're gonna hopefully find the answer.
Cristina: But you understand why they work with him?
Jack: I don't understand why they work with him. As far as we know, hopefully we will conclude these things, things we know about, I guess. Yeah.
Cristina: Thaniclons, huh?
Jack: He gives gifts for Christmas. Not sure what that's about. Although it seems obvious he's convinced parents to do that. Children become fearful of having done something bad which generates a subconscious perpetual fear overpowered trick. He can travel the earth in a single night. As far as the narrative goes, which is what we assume is a time control trick or something has assistance from fairies which are the gnomes he has, which is the next note I have here. Although we call them elves, it appears their description aligns more with gnomes has reindeers with unnatural abilities and based on the scriptures he is all knowing.
Cristina: Oh, what are the gnomes descriptors?
Jack: The gnomes descriptors is them being tiny. Them being. Their outfits, you know, tend to kind of all be in sync. They seem to unage childlike things with the exception that a lot of gnomes seem to be older men. But that seems to be our depictions of gnomes or particularly ancient gnomes who have been around a really long time. But gnomes seem to be very young. They seem to be very short. So almost comically like. Like adult toddlers but not looking like dwarfs, rather looking like a full grown human that you've just shrunk to the size. So there's proportionate when you shrink them. It's very odd.
Cristina: Okay.
Jack: Okay. Now weirdly enough you are fixed on Santa being on elation of some sort or Unelecian creation. There is something that lends itself in favor of your argument that becomes a really hard obstacle to unravel when going through this. And it's not even a hard thing to find. It's sort of the main thing that's just in the way but easy to ignore. He lives in the north pole of. We know he's there, everybody knows he's there. But it's also a giant place with empty whiteness in every direction. Because his home can't be. What?
Cristina: It's hidden.
Jack: It's hidden like what?
Cristina: Like the illusions home.
Jack: Like the Elysian's home.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: The big obvious elephant in the room that nobody thinks about.
Cristina: He's got their tech.
Jack: He's got their tech. Bare minimum.
Cristina: He's one of them.
Jack: Yeah, bare minimum. He has to at least start. That's the starting point. And we're convinced their bare minimum scale 1 or 2 so 1.5 just to break it even. Whatever. Interesting. Right? He lives in a place that's absolutely protected and invisible. Similar to the elation properties islands they have near the Isle of Man, Atlantis and when it was the palace of.
Cristina: Ok, how do you know the difference if he's one of them? Or one of their things.
Jack: Hopefully the, the, the, the clues we have will tell us the answer to that.
Cristina: Okay, because you have some information that I don't know about.
Jack: Well, there's a lot of information we're gonna go through. Okay, but is he creation? What do we know about his creations? We have Jesus, we have Arthur. Creations of the elations, we have Jesus, we have Arthur. Who else do we have? We have Joseph. These are all using the same idea. So whatever they have in common, if he shares any of that, I suppose, which he did, the knowing things part, you think it's. He doesn't need to. But that would be the only thing actually linking him because maybe he's more clever. But as we go through this, you're going to be very surprised about something that I have stumbled upon which completely reframe this. But we'll get to things as we get to things.
Cristina: Okay.
Jack: Order is important. Order is important. So in 1443, the first mentions of this omniscient being began to surface. And the first name he appeared with was Father Christmas.
Cristina: How do we know that he's not Jesus?
Jack: I don't know.
Cristina: Okay, I know that's a random thing to think, but like we know Jesus dies and he goes back and then he disappears.
Jack: Yeah, he disappears. Oh, there are similarities. Like a mother.
Cristina: How do we know he didn't reappear?
Jack: He could. He totally could. He totally could. And Jesus is very giving and wants you to do good.
Cristina: And the thing, like there's a lot. There's just so much similarities that it feels like this guy could be that guy.
Jack: Well, if this is the case. And Jesus is unstoppable.
Cristina: Isn'T he?
Jack: He seems to be a lot of the time, just to be fair, he does seem to be completely uncontrollable.
Cristina: I don't think they can stop him. And like, who's gonna stop Santa?
Jack: Like, come on, who's stopping Santa, dude? Like straight out.
Cristina: They're just hiding from him. They're hiding from both of them. They're hiding from both of them because they're the same person. Well, continue, continue. Pretend I didn't say that.
Jack: Okay, now, abilities we know factually based on all the things. Seems you can control time allegedly knows everything everyone does at all times can appear and disappear instantaneously. That leans itself hard into teleportation or into fairies poofing in and out through the. Through Alfame. They travel through Alfame. Crazy short distance time works differently. Pop up somewhere else. Necromancy abilities, which seems to be one of the most overpowered things we've come across. As of now. We're talking necromancy s**** on adrenochrome by miles. But also that seems to be included too. It seems to be a lot of stacking of things.
Cristina: Okay.
Jack: He has nine reindeers with properties identical to Elysian unicorn. That's another. He can teleport. Varioletian. He lives somewhere that disappears. Varioletian. He has the ability to pop in and out. Varioletian creatures with abilities. Variolation.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: Now let's get to some of the weirder things. Specifically, he can dematerialize into pure plasmic gas like substances to fit through seemingly any space. This is witnessed by individuals.
Cristina: Is he also a vampire?
Jack: That is totally leaning in that direction. Except we know the vampires don't really do that.
Cristina: So.
Jack: What the h*** is that? That's some higher tier level teleportation. We're watching the dematerialization. So it's not so advanced he could blink across the universe. He needs a physically shadow creature. Like he needs to move the matter.
Cristina: I feel like shadow creatures can do stuff like that. Which would mean like.
Jack: Come on.
Cristina: That makes him so much leaning towards Jesus. Because we know Jesus went into the shadow realm after he died.
Jack: Like he's shadow and mortal.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: Or was mortal. Now weirder one. His bag with a pocket dimension inside of it. He carries a pocket dimension around.
Cristina: See?
Jack: Weird.
Cristina: I'm guessing the gnomes would have helped him with that. I'm not sure.
Jack: Perhaps. Maybe that's connecting into something in Elfham where he just stores things.
Cristina: Or the necromancy powers.
Jack: 100%.
Cristina: These are the ones that figured out how to have a shadow realm. A stable teleporter. Teleporter portal. A. Yes.
Jack: Teleporter portal.
Cristina: Portal. Portal.
Jack: Santa does not age.
Cristina: Does he not age.
Jack: He does not age.
Cristina: He looks so old.
Jack: He's been that age. He can't die of unnatural causes. And he can't come. He can't die of natural causes. Not unnatural. He can't die of natural causes.
Cristina: And he can't become ill because he's already died.
Jack: Right.
Cristina: He is G6.
Jack: There's something off there.
Cristina: Come on.
Jack: Okay, screw Santa.
Cristina: Okay.
Jack: St. Nicholas. Things that are unrelated to everything I just said to Santa. If I've already said it, I'm not gonna mention it again. For St. Nicholas. I'm just gonna mention different details for St. Nicholas. There aren't many. A lot of them are shared with Santa. Obviously.
Cristina: Okay.
Jack: There are reasons for this. Presumably. So things to note, St. Nicholas was born in Turkey.
Cristina: Okay?
Jack: Now, abilities we know of that surpass human natural abilities are, as we know for a fact, managed to absolutely bring back to life three dead individuals.
Cristina: Those were the children?
Jack: Yes. So that's. Whoa. What's happening, bro? And I know I'm gonna explain later. So beautiful. A lot of this is gonna piece together. You're gonna help me piece together the.
Cristina: Rest of it, okay?
Jack: But he can bring people back to life. Now, I'm gonna go through some significant events and I'm gonna ask you what's connecting them, and then we're gonna figure things out, Right? Because there's a lot of sketchiness around in this guy. So significant events. This. I'm just calling this part significant events. He is said to have made a pilgrimage to Egypt and returned to be the bishop of Myra, which is a town just shortly after coming back. He revived the murdered three children who were pickled and going to be sold as pork.
Cristina: That's crazy.
Jack: Saved three girls kidnapped to be sold in the prostitution by dropping a coin into their home until their father had enough money to free them. I looked into this. He actually used to be a rich man. Not a rich man. His family was rich. They died. He spread their wealth when he inherited it, okay? Because he didn't need it.
Cristina: That doesn't explain the re. The turning those children back to life.
Jack: And the power of money. He was once on a ship sailing across to spread the good word. There was a storm and he single handedly calmed it so that they can continue traveling freely. That was like, what? Huh? You just walked outside, you're like, nah, storm.
Cristina: I think that's just Saint powers because I remember Saint Patrick just doing that to Nessie. Was it Saint Patrick? It was a saint that was there. And he was like, go. And then she just. She just walked away.
Jack: Oh, I think Maybe he also St. Patrick did that to the snakes too.
Cristina: Yeah, I guess. Like, get out of here.
Jack: Yeah.
Cristina: Scram. Okay.
Jack: He saved three soldiers from being executed after being wrongly accused of crimes.
Cristina: He did what?
Jack: He saved three soldiers who were being.
Cristina: Exactly. How did he save them?
Jack: He can. Apparently has Jedi mind powers.
Cristina: He just bought their freedom or something.
Jack: He did not buy their freedom. He protested in their favor.
Cristina: That's it.
Jack: Got them off.
Cristina: Okay. Okay.
Jack: This next part was very interesting to me because like I said, as I'm. As I go through these divided parts and stumble through things, we're gonna have a lot of. Oh. Be ready for this following sentence. It's a short one, but. Oh. Oh. Does it throw us in the right direction, man? He chopped down tree possessed by demons. Allegedly. I'll put that there. We'll come back for that later.
Cristina: What?
Jack: When his remains. His remains. His remains ooze an unnatural fluid that has been a complex problem because like they. They have his bones.
Cristina: That's gross. But very Catholic.
Jack: Yeah, they have his bones. And so a bunch of people came to study the compound of the chemical that's oozing and there they thought it was water initially. But upon closer and closer and closer inspection, there's a weird, unnatural unidentified combination for an iron like compound in there. What do you think that is?
Cristina: Is really the channel people? Is it really to the fairies? What's happening?
Jack: I don't know. Associated with St. Nicholas are two things that matter a lot. One is a staff. The staff has the head. The head of the staff is designed identically to a symbol inside of the magnum opus. The head of the staff.
Cristina: What does that mean, Magnum opus?
Jack: The magnum opus is the book that has the recipe for making a philosopher's son.
Cristina: Are you gonna say that he made Santa? I don't know. I know where you're going. But that is very random because he did go to Egypt, so he might have gotten some knowledge from there.
Jack: He went to Egypt. Right. Things are. Like I said, as I go through things, things are gonna happen, man.
Cristina: Okay, okay.
Jack: So yes, he has a staff.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: And the head of the staff is the exact symbol or one of the symbols that exists inside of the magnum opus. Designed exactly as it was originally. Which is a nice little symbol swirl that begins almost like a question mark where it connects to the staff. Just random detail.
Cristina: You think you don't know what it means or anything?
Jack: No, doesn't matter what the symbol means. It's one of many symbols. He is usually dressed in weird symbols too. And the most important thing I'm going to say relative to this man. And it took me a while to find a photo proofing this one because I found it in words first. And I looked and looked and looked and it seems almost erased from existence, but I found it in words. And so, you know, I flipped through enough until I stumbled upon the fact of the matter, which is that he wears a pendant around his neck. Where in the pendant there is a wine red gem encased at the center of his pendant.
Cristina: What does that mean?
Jack: A wine red gem at the center of the pendant around his neck.
Cristina: Are you like saying it's a philosopher's stone or something?
Jack: That's exactly what that sounds like to me.
Cristina: I thought they were apples.
Jack: The philosopher's stones aren't apples. Adam and Eve are code names for philosopher stones. Oh. Yeah.
Cristina: But we never got their descriptions. We have no idea what they look like.
Jack: We know based on the magnum opus that they are red gems.
Cristina: You do?
Jack: Yeah.
Cristina: I don't remember that description. Oh, and he's just walking around with one.
Jack: He has one independence.
Cristina: This is Nick, not St. Nicholas. He sacrificed himself and made this Jesus clause. I don't know. I don't know. None of this makes sense because he doesn't even seem like the type of person who will sacrifice people. Why does he have that? Who did he sacrifice? If it wasn't humans, it could be shadow realm people. I don't know. Like, maybe. What do the gnomes. Did the gnomes have him sacrifice their enemies and they're like, you help us, we help you type of the situation. Like, maybe they had some other fairy type beings that were bothering them. Maybe you should look into them and who they have problems with, because maybe we'll find out like he.
Jack: The gnome.
Cristina: Yeah, the gnomes.
Jack: You know how hard it is to find out anything about a fairy tale.
Cristina: Yeah, but if you just. You just shoot. You should. You should just try.
Jack: I mean, there's nothing wrong with looking.
Cristina: Yeah, like why? How did he get it? He had to kill something. He didn't have many things.
Jack: Well, I'm gonna go through my theories on what happened.
Cristina: Okay. What do you think of my theory first?
Jack: What's your theory?
Cristina: That they had him get rid of whatever they had a problem with, and then they're now helping him. Not him, but whatever this new version is. They helped him to make that stone, though, because he helped them solve a problem which created the stone in the first place. I know it's crazy, but, like, the.
Jack: Problem is I know the answer to the question you're asking.
Cristina: Okay, okay, okay.
Jack: And clean the sort of yes and no altogether.
Cristina: Okay.
Jack: So about everything, we've already gone through things that stand out to me. He chopped down a freaking tree that possessed some sort of thing. He or written states was a demon. We know of trees with special abilities. He went. It's important that he chopped down the street. There was a significant importance to him doing that to this tree. That was a big deal for him. And so it became a big deal for whoever was telling the narrative of this event where he tore down the tree. Chopped down the tree. That's because I am believing that this tree is a very familiar tree because of two things. One, it's a fairy Tree? No, I swear to God. It has to be because the story originates in Germanic region which leads us quite close to the Saltic region. And he had to travel to get to the tree.
Cristina: Maybe they asked him to do that. Maybe someone like import an important gnome was in that tree. He was saving the gnome. He wasn't actually getting rid of a fairy because we know that fairy trees, we believe there's fairy souls in them. But what if you can't really kill a fairy? Like we have an idea that you can, but maybe you can't. Like maybe it's more confusing than.
Jack: Maybe it's more complicated than our concept of death.
Cristina: Yes. When it comes to fairies. So, like their quote unquote, death looks like these trees. He chops it down. He saves the fairy that was in it, which was a gnome. Therefore all the gnomes help him. Could if it was like a very important. No type of.
Jack: No way to know. Could definitely be. That is such an important moment that it got written down. The problem is the way he was describing it in the writing. There is a demon inside the tree. So the tree is no good. The individual writing this must have been going off of the word of St Nicholas who had to cut the tree down. So he taking the word of St. Nicholas. That's bad. I need to deal with the tree.
Cristina: Well, he can't tell him what he's really doing. If he knew what he was really doing, why would he tell someone?
Jack: What would somebody else do about it?
Cristina: I don't know. But it was important to keep this secret.
Jack: Fair. If that's the case, the idea would be he is something is in the tree and he's extracting something from the tree by chopping the tree. That's the facts of the matter. So I found that very interesting. Another thing that kept showing up was the consistency of three. Three murdered children. He saved three kidnapped girls. He saved three soldiers that were about to be executed. That seems to be a consistent pattern. I don't know the significance of that per se. I just know that that was interesting. Okay, now framing this man like an Elysian. Yes. The reindeers. There's something off about that. Identical. When we compare them.
Cristina: Who are we talking about now? Because now we're. Because you just separated St. Nicholas with Santa. Are we saying they're both the same person? Are we saying they're not the same?
Jack: Oh, no, no, no. I haven't combined them into one person.
Cristina: Okay.
Jack: At this point, I'm still jumping between these two individuals.
Cristina: Okay.
Jack: So. Okay. I guess it would make Sense to say now that we know the differences between these two individuals. What do we know for a fact or not for fact? So out of the information that we have.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: What can we say factually looks like elation related of all of this information. All of this.
Cristina: No matter who it falls under.
Jack: No matter who it falls under. Now we're trying to tie them together.
Cristina: Okay.
Jack: Because again, there's a lot of things that are similar, but what things about them being the same person tells us he's on Elysian. The reindeer are definitely identical to Alician unicorns.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: There is almost no distinction how they move through air. Without the requirement of wings, they can travel almost in vertical positions. Like that feels very, very Elysian. Cloaked home. Very Elysian.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: That might be the most Elysian thing ever because that's one of the first things we know it through all the places of the Elysians, the mountains they've hidden.
Cristina: Okay. This is random again of him making him seem like maybe this is Jesus, even though there's Nick. The thing is, like, he knows when you're not. The whole thing of him knowing things like that, you. If you're nodding or nice. Like, we know the Elysians are hiding from Jesus and we know that we can sense him and so they can. Like, we all know things about him we shouldn't that they were hiding from that. But like, we don't know if he knows also things about them, even though he's never met them. Like, what if it works both ways of not just us seeing him, but he can see us and that them too, not just us. Like we say he knows when we're not in it. But like, what if he can. Like this come.
Jack: The problem is that this comes back to pure speculation. We have nothing on this.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: The problem is that if we devolve to pure speculation, we have nowhere to go because it's a giant. Well, what if. And then. Okay, then what?
Cristina: But just what I know. But still, what if he does? And then that means like, okay, so then that's how he knows Elysian technology even though he's never met them. Because he just.
Jack: He knows who Jesus.
Cristina: Yes, because he knows who's not Aaron Ice. Because he knows more about what's going on than like, he's got psychic abilities, I guess is the.
Jack: He also might have connections to things like the shadow Gods. And the shadow gods have access to Elysian technologies.
Cristina: Jesus or Jesus. Okay.
Jack: It'S a bypass.
Cristina: Yes. But then why does Santa have that tech? But okay, continue with Anna anyway.
Jack: Well, those things stand out heftily to me. They seem to be like real weird ones. Definitely the tree thing. Definitely the reindeer. Definitely the Elysian cloaking technology. So this is how I see the events happening. When we add the little details we know because there's quite the gap between St. Nicholas and Santa. So let's talk time, distance, right?
Cristina: Okay.
Jack: Three hundreds is when we come across St. Nicholas. That's when he was alive. The three hundreds in his life. He meets the Egyptians in the Promised Land. The Promised Land goes by many names, but the most commonly used is the Holy Land. The holy land where St Nicholas went to meet the Egyptian just so happens to be. If you look on this map right here, we see Egypt. You see how it's connecting into Africa right there and whatever. And you see how it's taking parts of Iraq and like going through the bottom part of Iran there. It's because it crosses to Persia to get to the Egyptians. Nice and close to where Persia was. You know, where their stuff would have been many years after they left. And if there's any rogues left behind, that's where they would be. So he goes through former Persia and in this process he's introduced to Elysians. We know this because as a human willing the help, he is later enlisted amongst the Christians to assist them, as we already know. Thank you, St. Patrick for revealing the truth of how interactions with the Christians go. You get chosen. We know St. Peter, we know St. Patrick and now we have St. Nicholas. All that kind of went through the same problem.
Cristina: Okay, new idea.
Jack: Go for it.
Cristina: Okay, Random, but. Well, not random. You were talking about necromancy and how it's hard for people to get in. We don't know any stories of people who succeeded. But what if we do know and they're called saints?
Jack: Oh, s***. Oh, f***.
Cristina: Because they're the ones that have those abilities.
Jack: Well then allow me to establish the reality of the matter that if a saint is the accomplishment of a necromancer.
Cristina: That means they know shadow realm variant. And just remind me, 100 abilities.
Jack: Yes, 100%. That means that the main factor to being a saint, AKA a necromancer. So they're, you know, necromancers. The old name saint is the new name.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: The main requirement is being human. You can't do it as an elation. That would immediately disqualify Marlin is actually having been because again, this is a fuzzy detail. Him being half and half. We know half shadow, we are assuming half a lesion. We don't know.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: But it seems quite consistent that there is a other factor needed to be a saint. And I suppose this is why Jesus doesn't qualify as a saint. Because he's not a necromancer.
Cristina: No, but he has abilities to.
Jack: He has different abilities.
Cristina: Okay.
Jack: While necromancers, saints might have to go through the dying process, too, but all saints exist after the events of Jesus. So is it that. Oh, we learned, and we can make the process like. Is that the process? Then? Are saints the process? Jesus was the first attempt. It failed. We got this thing. But we can take some things out and make saints. But then why Joseph? I don't know. Why do you need Joseph? It doesn't make sense. That breaks down immediately. Why do you need Joseph? Why do you need King Arthur?
Cristina: But those are for different things.
Jack: Well, King Arthur's for something different. King Arthur is something different, but not Joseph. It looks like his goal isn't like the goal of his existence is essentially to be able to bridge distances, which is, if you have this technology as an elation, then what the h***? Why would you need it? Then again, Joseph isn't an Elysian. He's made by the Jews. Fair enough, Arthur. Questionable. We don't really know Jesus Definitely made by the Elysians.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: Don't know. I don't know the relevance. I don't know the relevance.
Cristina: I'm over here thinking just, saints are definitely humans.
Jack: Saints seem to be predominantly human that.
Cristina: Are trained from Elian.
Jack: Yeah. Well, Catholicism as a whole seems to be pretty controlled by the Elians.
Cristina: Yes. Hide their secrets and all that crap. But saints are a little. They're just. They're the top tier.
Jack: Yeah. There's way more elitism. Well, we have no idea where the Pope falls into that. He's like the big honcho in religion, which means he must be getting the big.
Cristina: Does he become a saint after he dies?
Jack: I don't know. Maybe. Maybe the goal is, you know, become.
Cristina: You have to die first.
Jack: Yes. It seems to be always the case. That's literally part of the rules.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: And you need to prove understanding of things. You have to accomplish things using the stuff before you went through the trend. So interesting rule set. Right. Because in order to become a saint, you need to have accomplished miracles and you have to die. So in order to have accomplished miracles, as far as we know, that's just another way of phrasing, you have to have successfully used the lesion technology, which means it's very difficult to actually do have to prove a higher level of intelligence as A lower intelligence creature. Yes, that's requirement number one.
Cristina: Yes.
Jack: And then you dying means now you have the ability to use Shadow Realm technology. And necromancy is the fusion of those two things.
Cristina: Two things? Three things.
Jack: Those are two things that's dying and being able to use Shadow Realm technology, which is one thing, and then it's using Elysian technology, which is the other thing.
Cristina: Okay, but then you also have to know about fairies.
Jack: Oh, she had to be a necromancer.
Cristina: Yes, it's even more complicated. Like how.
Jack: So then how do you get that part?
Cristina: No idea.
Jack: No idea. Interesting. So that's actually a part to this missing a huge chunk.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: Anyways, yes. So 300 years ago, this man is. I mean 300 years ago, in the year 300, this man is born, he meets the Elysians, goes to the promised land, AKA the Holy Land, is introduced to Elysians as a human willing to help. Now that we know how this works in general, like St. Patrick, he becomes enlisted among the Christians to assist in the cause of the Elysians.
Cristina: Yeah.
Jack: With Elysian technology at his disposal, he manages to cross paths with fairies. This is where we spin off into some interesting things. With fairy assistance, he successfully builds a location at the North Pole that is unknown to the Elysians. And with Elysian technology, successfully cloaks it from them.
Cristina: So he start he was working with them and then somehow. Why? What happened?
Jack: Rogueness.
Cristina: Why?
Jack: Self interest and lack of fear. Now at this new location, he gradually brings technological specs that he sneaks out of elation facilities.
Cristina: How?
Jack: Just casually, because of being a high ranking member and having to learn how to use all these things and blah blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah blah. He's slowly, you know, here and there.
Cristina: He'S working with Jesus.
Jack: I don't know, I don't know.
Cristina: Prove to me. He's not.
Jack: Proved to you. He's not. Now these technologies stolen allowed them to somehow create or locate a philosopher's stone because they have access to elation things.
Cristina: Because of the Egyptians he had it.
Jack: He didn't have it when he went to Egypt. We know that he is known for having it.
Cristina: Okay, that was in the period where he wants to see.
Jack: No, we know that he was. He became the leader of Myra, which is a town. When he returned from Egypt, they deemed oh no, your worth being the leader now just because you were over there and you have whatever.
Cristina: Well, does he have stone? Who did he sacrifice or.
Jack: He located one, which is a red pendant. Using fairy assistance, the narrative of the man to fear begins to spread.
Cristina: Do you really think he just found the stone?
Jack: I don't know. I don't know how he acquired it. Now, with immortality on his side, enters the big picture game, right? Because this isn't a short term thing. It's exponential, but gradual at the start, right? One person tells two, two people tell for so on so far. So he has immortality. He can play the long game. It's the three hundreds. He's not going anywhere. By the 1443, you know, 1400s, 1443, the first mentions of Father Christmas arrive, but there was no association with gifts. There was a man who showed up and seemed absolutely determined to convince people that there is a reward beyond divinity. It's not God, but there is a moral obligation to give to others. It had nothing to do with children. It had nothing to do with giving to the poor. It had to do with a state of happiness and the state of uppity ness, essentially. Like if you're down bad, if you're up good, and the bad being, you know, you're sad, you're not doing well. If you're not going to be around people to cheer yourself up, you're doing it wrong. You should always aim towards this Christmas time to have now. What's Christmas time? Christmas time is just a general, hey, what if together we got once in a while to just make sure we're all doing well and if we're not, we're doing something wrong. So there was a togetherness of this discussion. This man was having fear was never in the discussion to begin. Really? Yeah, 100%. It's just this man shows up in the 1400s and he's just talking all this stuff which starts to take off. Christmas does start to take off and it's almost spreading everywhere in Europe. It's everywhere. Everywhere? Everywhere. Everywhere. Everywhere. All the Germanic countries and a lot of the Latin countries are also adopting these traditions that this man, that nobody knows anything about Father Christmas, this man, and he's over here preaching all this stuff. And it's starting to pick up now. 200 years pass, it has completely flooded all of Europe and this myth suddenly gets inserted. The if you don't, you will be punished part, but if you do, you're gonna be rewarded.
Cristina: Okay?
Jack: And that part was almost entirely focused on children. Almost like the narrative suddenly changed.
Cristina: Do you have any idea why?
Jack: There is no mention for why. There's just a huge awareness that scholars have with the written narrative that suddenly. And this is where the gnomes come in. Because again, the gnomes helps in spreading the story. But the fact that almost everywhere in Europe simultaneously, it became about children. It became about. Not children necessarily, but about the punishment and reward system.
Cristina: Anything that has to do with the gnomes.
Jack: The gnomes that could be anywhere, whenever. Or portals or whatever the case might be. This ability to be suddenly, in many places, paid off. Right now the idea is you're a bad person. You're not gonna get rewarded if you don't go out of your way to cheer other people up. And the reward for doing that is things you've wanted and fantasized about. Fine, whatever. Sure. Story gets spread, narrative spreads, and it becomes a survival trick that if this is the reality of the matter and it. Because it's everywhere, suddenly people just add it to the culture and parents begin to teach it to the children as a way to have the children prepared to naturally do this in the future as adults. That way they are just there for those around them. Then slowly the gift giving becomes a thing because, oh, literally somebody. But again, this is. We went from the 1400s to the 1600s, and in the 1600s, boom. Suddenly this just shows up about the f****** reward system. Then in the 1700s, almost 100 years, like clockwork, like somebody planned the drop. Again, we get an addition to the story. We get the mention of the man himself being the present delivery guy.
Cristina: Okay?
Jack: But we don't have Santa Claus yet. We just have this is father guy and we've seen him through God knows how long, and he always seems to be around. He's this thing who wants us to be moral people and take care of each other. And if you don't, he knows because he knows everything. But suddenly people start getting gifts. Now here we have the break in the story that becomes very interesting. Why by the 1880s, Santa Claus is in all of Europe, some parts of Asia, and in the now developing Americas. Right. And that's quickly spreading through North America and migrating south. We have a lot of Santa Claus going on. The division happens when we have Santa Claus, the individual who is delivering these gifts and is treating the people and is. And us having this sort of mass spread of the narrative, I suppose we would argue is we have Santa Claus and we have the gnomes and we have his spread of the narrative. And this power. There is this division that starts to happen where people seem to be receiving the detail that. And I don't know how I have. I couldn't find anything relative to this. But I did find an interesting line which I'll mention in one moment. It Seems like the psyop was aimed at poor families that couldn't get. That weren't being like, things weren't dropped off. My bad. The other way around at rich families, poor families would receive things. Rich kids who could receive things wouldn't. And then their parents would go and buy the thing so that they would have the thing like the poor kids and not feel inferior.
Cristina: Someone was getting things for the poor kids.
Jack: The poor kids started receiving things. People immediately associated this with Father Christmas. Okay, the question is, the division in the story that's happening here is we have a guy who's going out of his way to spread this narrative, and then we have a person literally, like. My question is, does this division in the story happen because he records requires the parents to start doing it? Because you reach the early 1900s and there's no more sudden. There's no more stories in writing of him literally doing the thing. It seems like the old stories keep moving forward and people buy their children gifts. Like it was part of the thing that, like, if we get the people to do it, then people will teach people to do it. Then I can continue to remove myself from the equation. So we have the reality of him removing himself, and then this illusion, this narrative that keeps being pushed by the people who teach it to their children.
Cristina: Okay, so then he doesn't really do any of this?
Jack: No, he completely removed himself from the situation. It took a really long time and many blocks and wires crossing here and there and here and there. But it seems like he's no longer involved in any part of this process. He fully detached himself. And now following that point in the early 1900s, it becomes a bit of an issue to differentiate which side. Is it something that kept rolling forward and then added to the fake story, and which side is something from the reality of themselves matter, because again, there's two versions of him moving forward from that point. There is a real him who seems to have just kind of detached, and there is narrative that keeps moving forward and things that morph with time. You play a game.
Cristina: So everything we learn about Santa Claus, though, then, is not real. And it's part of this story that has been building up?
Jack: Well, no, because that only happened very recently. All these other stories have existed for quite some time, and a lot of them are written sometimes surrounding literal scripture.
Cristina: The Santa Claus ones?
Jack: Yeah. There's mythology and there's scripture, including St. Nicholas. It seems to be the St. Nicholas is in fact Santa Claus. That seems to be. They are one on one. St. Nicholas traveled and he Santa Claus is him extending his life beyond the mortal bounds of human. He is some sort of a human. He seems to ha. Yes. In fact have received some form of training in technological use and in service to the Elysians. And he seems to be some sort of a traitor who has not just access to the things, but came across to write elfame individuals who are also traitors. Which also seems to be where the narrative of gnomes being untrustworthy stems from.
Cristina: So what does. Okay, but all these stories are or not fake. But he's not doing anything. What is he doing?
Jack: He was giving gifts for some time, but now.
Cristina: Currently.
Jack: Currently, as of now, it doesn't seem that he. We don't know what would he do that we could understand. As things have gotten higher scale, he has exited realms of our understanding. You can follow the narrative back from when he was just a dude literally traveling on foot all the way to Egypt. Comes back, he's already the leader. You give him a little more time.
Cristina: I think he's just running a town of gnomes or a city of gnomes.
Jack: And why does he interact with us? What's what?
Cristina: No, he's not interacting with us because he said these stories are just moving forward.
Jack: What was the point of the. Why would you need to run anything? Why did he interact with us? Rather what was the point of those.
Cristina: Things before the story spread? I don't know.
Jack: There's holes and he's really hard to pin down. He's a really hard guy to figure out.
Cristina: He spread those stories. What if those are just stories? If he had nothing involved with those stories?
Jack: That be weird because it's in service to him. That makes no sense. There's no Jesus.
Cristina: Like there's stories of him being good, but we know that they don't see him as a good guy.
Jack: I don't get your point.
Cristina: The Elysians. The Elysians don't make anyone villain.
Jack: The Aletians aren't spreading stories of Santa Claus.
Cristina: How do you know though?
Jack: Because the stories of Santa Claus I've retrieved from everywhere else. The only mention relative to him is what we get from St. Nicholas.
Cristina: Where are those stories coming from?
Jack: Everything before he disappears. And that's from Christianity. And that tells us nothing about Santa Claus. All the stories about Santa Claus happen after those events in which he is mentioned as Saint Nicholas. Saint Nicholas disappears and a man with all the identical characteristics plus some shows up. And we consider him Father Christmas and Father Christmas. Eventually we just consider him Santa Claus. But we know factually those are the Same guy. And then Father Christmas is just some guy who happens to have exactly the same characteristics, features, behaviors in the same region as St Nicholas, who is a human that was both in contact on record with Egyptians, which we know are one of the two major groups to be in contact with the Alicians and is later recruited for a literal organization made by the Elysians, which is Catholicism as a high ranking member. So that's it. We don't like the Elysians. Don't tell us about all this other stuff that we get elsewhere. Talking about Santa Claus and Father Christmas that's elsewhere. Those are coming from different sources that have nothing to do with Catholicism or Christianity as a whole. Because that seems almost entirely focused on the suppression of anything related to them when it comes to these technologies. Anyways, that's pretty much what I have. I think he is definitely associated with the Elysians. He seems to have been employed by them or whatever we want to call people who are part of the Catholic empire, then abandoned them and then abandoned them in exchange for establishing something way more complicated. He definitely seems to have some necromancy related things. There definitely doesn't. Seems to be delivery methods don't make sense. I don't know if we got anywhere in this conversation if we concluded anything, didn't necessarily ground any thoughts here, but we at least managed to go through what we do know and compare some notes. He definitely at least seems to unpack paper. Be a former elation associate now trader who works with gnomes, which are a type of fairy.
Cristina: You don't think he's doing anything currently?
Jack: I don't know. I was hoping to figure that out based on what we knew, but we've run out of time and there's no way to figure that out in the future. We will go through and hopefully try to pinpoint more specifically what he's doing now, if anything or if any clue about things from the past can lead us in any direction like that or anything we can on him. Because the problem is how enigmatic and difficult to comprehend. Pin down. Find anything on him. He is up there with some of the. Like the fairies. They're just difficult to get to.
Cristina: But you think these stories about him have like some. Do you think the gnomes are spreading the stories? I don't understand.
Jack: I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. For the future. For the future.
Cristina: All right.
Jack: Anyways, if you guys have any ideas on anything we have discussed relative to Santa Claus or your upcoming holiday events, feel free to Message us on all our socials. You could do that at just convopodom X on Tick Tock on Instagram and Facebook.
Cristina: Do you say that?
Jack: Yes.
Cristina: Remember to subscribe and rate and review the show.
Jack: Yes. And word of mouth. Very important. Tell everybody everything you know about this show and about these episodes and about Christmas.
Cristina: This has been the Rambling podcast. Take nothing personal and thanks for listening. Bye.
Jack: Oh, what government can just put your child through the transitioning process? That sounds weird, huh?
Cristina: There's so much wrong there.
Jack: Yeah, yeah, obviously so.
Cristina: Fear and blood.
Jack: Fear and blood. All of it. All of the above. Always 100. But we don't think about it now. It's every. It's obvious. Obvious. Obviously. You're taking the children. That's immediately what I'm gonna think is happening. And then you really think about it. It's like, yeah, of course you're finding a way to draw blood of children. Always. That's always been the goal. That's always gonna be the goal. You're finding ways to draw blood from the children. Duh.
Cristina: Yes. F****** in every. But all our episodes end up there.
Jack: Yes. Well, no, but everything ended up connected like that. And it's like we began and then eventually we found the sea people and great. You know, you're gonna follow the trail a little. God d***. Is the trail like, bro, they did everything in their power to hide it. Look, journalism paid off. It did. Journalism paid off. Thank you. Educational system would have been very expensive if I didn't get full ride, but f***, bro, you dig deep enough and you end up fighting. Finding these connections.
Cristina: Good morning. Good morning. The podcast is hosted by Christina Collazo and Jack Thomas, produced by Lynn Taylor and published by greatthoughts.info art by Zero Lupo and logo by Seth McCallister with social media managed by Amber Black.