Wild Columbian Hippos

"Oh, what's the fuss? We just walked off for a bite to eat".

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It's hard to picture Hippos on the lam. They don't have the lean hard physique typical of fugitives. Although they can run very fast. I don't think they much inclined to run. I imagine they busted out of the zoo at an unhurried saunter, completely indifferent to any zookeeper's hysterical shouts of: stop, stop, stop!

I doubt they even wondered what the ruckus was about.

Four Hippos made the breakout around 1993. The zoo belonged to the infamous drug lord, Pablo Escobar. Pablo had the Hippos shipped to Columbia for invitation-only viewing at his extravagant plantation complex in the Magdalena basin.

Pablo had neglected the zoo for several years because he, himself. was behind bars. By the time he died in 1993, zoo and plantation were falling apart in mildewed tropical ruin.

The menagerie had been left to shift for themselves. Many animals died.

The Hippos walked leisurely away to a life of freedom in the Magdalena basin. It was effortless. They took to Columbia's watery wilderness as though they'd always lived there. Roomy swimming holes and all the delicious greenery a hippo could ever want made it seem just like home.

Some humans weren't so sure.

Biologists, environmentalists, and animal-rights groups have done a lot of hand-wringing over the whole business. You know, the usual fretting over eco-system disruptions: clashes with resident species and changes to the land - Hippos, like elephants and beavers are famous for rearranging existing geography to their own partiality.

In addition, though not breeding quite as fast as bunnies, the Hippos are doing pretty well. The original four soon multiplied to 133. That's estimated to grow to 300 by 2030. By 2040 1,500 Hippos are expected have their way with a full half of the entire Magdalena river.

It the Hippos could talk they'd probably say, "Oh. what's the fuss? We just walked off for a bite to eat. Then that curvaceous cutie, Lola, started flirting with the guys. One thing led to another. Now we're accused of being an 'invasive species'. I don’t think any Hippo even knows what that means.

Anyway, whatever it means - it's not our fault"!

By K. L. Shipley

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