Conversation with a Killer: Anonymous

A Conversation with a Killer

By Jack Thomas

Jack – Hello, stranger.

Stranger – Hey.

Jack – Alright. Tell the readers what this conversation is about.

Stranger – We’re going to talk about a man I killed. And how I got away with it.

Jack – My only job here is to ask the right questions. To pull this in the most interesting direction. How’d we meet?

Stranger – I emailed you.

Jack – And what did you send me?

Stranger – Newspaper clippings. Proof. A case barely mentioned. Buried.

Jack – Why?

Stranger – I read one of your interviews. A rape survivor. Thought this story would fit the tone.

Jack – This site is whatever people need it to be. You refuse to share your name. Explain why, and what else you won’t share.

Stranger – The people involved asked me to keep details secret. They don’t want this out there. No name. No town. No state.

Jack – You’re a clinical psychopath. Correct?

Stranger – Yeah.

Jack – When were you diagnosed?

Stranger – Seven or eight.

Jack – What made them study you?

Stranger – A relative died. I didn’t react the way they wanted. Therapy happened.

Jack – Define psychopathy in general. And then for you, personally.

Stranger – Generally, it’s detachment. You don’t feel emotional connections unless you choose them. Or sometimes, not at all.

Jack – What’s your personal take?

Stranger – It means I get to start with logic first.

Jack – December 31st. Take us there.

Stranger – New Year’s party. My girlfriend’s house.

Jack – Drinking?

Stranger – Yeah.

Jack – Drunk?

Stranger – Yeah.

Jack – You were nineteen. She?

Stranger – Twenty. Her family didn’t care.

Jack – When did you leave?

Stranger – 2 a.m. January 1st.

Jack – What’s the first thing you did when you got home?

Stranger – Slept. Passed out instantly.

Jack – What woke you?

Stranger – Glass shattering in the kitchen. Plates, cups.

Jack – Did you check?

Stranger – No. Figured my stepdad was drunk, broke something.

Jack – Who lived with you?

Stranger – My mom. My stepdad. Two brothers.

Jack – How long before you went to check?

Stranger – Thirty seconds. Maybe a minute.

Jack – What’s the first thing you see?

Stranger – Darkness. The kitchen light switch was behind a cheap cabinet. I flipped it.

Jack – Then?

Stranger – Soda bottles and fruit punch scattered on the floor. A red puddle. Glass everywhere.

Jack – A mess.

Stranger – Yeah. Then my mother’s voice: “What is wrong with you?”

Jack – To you?

Stranger – I thought so. I looked at her door. Open. Dark. She and my stepfather still in bed.

Jack – So who was she talking to?

Stranger – The man standing over them.

Jack – What the fuck.

Stranger – Yeah.

Jack – What happened next?

Stranger – He started hitting her. Punching. Knees to the ribs.

Jack – What did you do?

Stranger – Nothing, at first. My brain wasn’t processing it.

Jack – And then?

Stranger – My stepfather threw him. From the bed to the living room. One move. He lunged after him.

Jack – Did he fight back?

Stranger – He slammed my stepfather to the floor.

Jack – Was he okay?

Stranger – Yeah. Gave me time to grab his arm and throw him at the door. He hit it hard.

Jack – Where’s your family?

Stranger – Older brother on the phone. Younger brother hiding. Stepdad and I throw the guy outside.

Jack – End of story?

Stranger – No. He picks up a lead pipe. Starts slamming the door.

Jack – Like a zombie.

Stranger – Exactly. He wasn’t reasonable. He looked confused. Like he didn’t know why he was doing this.

Jack – He gets in?

Stranger – No. But he ripped the door off its hinges.

Jack – Holy shit.

Stranger – Yeah.

Jack – So?

Stranger – My stepdad and I held the door up. I started thinking.

Jack – About?

Stranger – Drugs. Or mental illness. Either way, he wouldn’t stop. Not today. Not ever.

Jack – And that’s when you grabbed the knife.

Stranger – Yeah.

Jack – Why?

Stranger – If he wasn’t gonna stop, and he would keep getting out of jail, he’d do this again. Maybe to me.

Jack – You were okay with going to prison?

Stranger – Yeah.

Jack – So you pull your stepdad off the door.

Stranger – Yeah.

Jack – And?

Stranger – The guy sees the knife. Eyes go wide. “No, no, no.” He backs up.

Jack – He has the pipe?

Stranger – Yeah. Doesn’t swing it.

Jack – Shock.

Stranger – Yeah.

Jack – And then?

Stranger – I stabbed him.

Jack – Just like that?

Stranger – Yeah.

Jack – Where?

Stranger – First one—stomach.

Jack – Reaction?

Stranger – None.

Jack – Drugs.

Stranger – Right.

Jack – Second stab?

Stranger – Chest. His face dropped. Sad. Confused.

Jack – And then?

Stranger – I kept going.

Jack – How many?

Stranger – Sixteen.

Jack – Sixteen.

Stranger – Yeah.

Jack – Then what?

Stranger – I went inside. Helped my mom clean the kitchen.

Jack – That’s it?

Stranger – Yeah.

Jack – He was still alive?

Stranger – Yeah. Bled out in the hallway.

Jack – Cops show?

Stranger – Half an hour later.

Jack – Arrest you?

Stranger – No. Self-defense.

Jack – Did he die?

Stranger – At the hospital.

Jack – Any consequences?

Stranger – No. His family didn’t press charges.

Jack – Why?

Stranger – He’d done it before. They knew it would happen again.

Jack – That’s it? You got away with murder?

Stranger – I went to court once. They let it slide.

Jack – How do you feel?

Stranger – Nothing. It had to happen.

Jack – Does this disconnect come from your psychopathy?

Stranger – Yeah. It’s why I saw the bigger picture.

Jack – Any last words?

StrangerYou’re not crazy. You’re different. And that scares people.

Jack – Thanks for your time.

Stranger – Thanks for having me.