To Become

To Become is a science fantasy short. One human's exploration turns into survival, forgiveness, and discovery. The Explore's journey ends with a decision that may affect the destiny of more than just the human race. Maybe a new journey began.

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His eyes opened to the unknown. An entire world the color of washed-out rust. Well, that wasn't exactly true. There were those hard-shelled blackish things crawling around. Most of them were as long as an arm and looked like a trilobite. They seemed harmless enough until they reared up on their back legs. Under the front half of their bodies was a stunted beak. It covered nearly half of their length, and they were full of jagged teeth. These things definitely weren't plant eaters. His training was remiss in dealing with alien carnivores.

And then there was the other thing. It probably was the brightest green this place had ever seen. From this vantage point, it looked like some kind of pod. It wasn't like a bean pod, and it could have been taller than a person. It seemed to be a flower ready to bloom, but there was no plant attached to it. A bud. That may be the best way to describe it. If this green pod really was a plant, then it may be his best hope.

It was in front of him now. Only a few more minutes and he would be able to inspect it. He rested on top of the boulder. His heart rate was much too fast, and the patch wouldn't last much longer. One of the “bites” had ripped his suit right above his boot. Maybe, the bite did give him the right to name those little monsters. After all, he was the first human to land on this world. A thought flashed through his mind. If I die. I would like to die someplace those little monsters can't get me.

“Landed.” He laughed at himself. “More like survived impact. Call me crash-man.” The truth of it was that he didn't remember anything after receiving a strange signal while mapping the system. It was an alien code. It was like some of the signals he had seen during the war, but it wasn't the same. He woke up in the cockpit escape pod. It was lying on its side with a blown-out canopy. And there he was with no idea what he was doing there. All he remembered was the signal. Images of the war flashed through his mind.

He remembered someone saying how lucky he had been to be on the frontline. He shouted at the sky through his helmet, “You called that a war?” His breaths were too fast and too short. His mind began to calm. “War. It was more like a skirmish. But people still died anyway. It was settled quickly. And very few people got hurt.” He corrected himself. “Very few ‘beings’ got hurt. Peace is good.” He was still angry at the pointlessness of it all. He leaned back on the rock. “Still, it was too many.”

The panic from awakening alone in a strange place, and not being able to remember was starting to subside. But the clarity of thought did not ease his dread. He was alone on a strange world. Most of his long-term survival equipment had been destroyed in the crash. He did have his lifeboat. It would give him about 30 days.

Thirty days? And luck would not be on his side. It would take half of that just to realize he was missing. Then they would search his last mission stop first. When they finished that search, his time would be gone. He laughed to himself. “My transponder's in pieces. I saw at least 18 planets, and three asteroid belts circling a giant red sun. Budget cuts. Good luck doing a manual search with a shortage of ships. Space, the new frontier. Join us, and we'll go broke together. Yes, you’ll earn all the benefits of being overworked and underpaid. You'll get to spend months alone in space; all the while, leaving everyone you love behind.”

“Well, Honey, at least you won’t starve. My pension, hazard pay, and death benefits. You’ll be set. Maybe a little guilt will help you grow up.” He wanted to scream up at the sky again. Instead, he mumbled. “On my last trip too.”

She had said that she hoped he would die out here. He knew that she didn't really mean it. He hoped that she really didn't hate him. He had tried very hard not to be unkind to her. He hoped one day his wife would be able to understand that. He didn't say anything for a moment. “We did find intelligent life. I lived through a war, and I still won't get to meet them face to face. Honey, if you get to hear this, I really didn't mean it.” His eyes begin to close. The world grew dim.

“Click. Click, click, click, click, click. Click. Click. Click. Click. Click....”

Sleep had almost taken him when the outer microphones on his suit began to work. He peeked over the edge of the boulder. The clicking. It was a very large bite. It was trying to claw its way up the rock, but it couldn’t get a grip. He thought. The suit’s electronics are working again. “I will have to be careful. Damn thing's going to record everything I say now."

When he touched the ground, he looked at the leg of his suit. The patch held. That big bite was on the other side of the boulder. He should have time to get away. He stepped forward towards the green pod.

The earth seemed to crack under his feet. The sound was irregular. It didn't happen every step. “Crunch.” That sound again.

He began to hurry as the sound spooked him. There it was again. A crunch followed by scratching. The scratching he hadn't noticed before. He felt his breath quickened as he tried to move towards the next boulder. He scrambled up a large round sided stone with a flat top. He glanced back in time to see the earth under some of his foot-falls being sucked away. This was when the truth of it came to him. A bite no bigger than a hand tried to scurry away out of the leavings of a footfall. The bite didn’t make it. “Something bigger than it sucked it down.”

“Careful.” He whispered to himself. He thought that it would be better if he didn't walk through the open ground. He nodded. He would walk around the edge of the outcropping on the hard stones. He would have to be careful of falling rocks under the edge, but it should be safe. Anyway, the green pod was at the end of the outcroppings curve. He mumbled, “Five minutes longer, but I won't get sucked under.” Once again, he headed toward his destination.

He had reached the end of the outcropping when it happened. It was so fast; he didn't see the movement. He knew the pod had opened. It had six or eight blood-red petals. Each petal had outer rows which seemed to be white teeth. Molars, maybe? But what had it done? It seemed to open up, swoop over him and close back up in one fluid motion. What was that at the end? Did something come out of it? Did it shoot something out? He touched the front of his suit, like he was examining it. “It didn’t touch me?”

He had cleared the outcropping. From where he was, a gently tossed stone could have hit the pod. It was more solid than it appeared from a distance. And it was a lot bigger. It was perfectly still now. Once again, it looked like a bud that was ready to bloom. Behind him, the clicking and scratching grew louder. He tapped his side. “God, I wish I had a weapon.” He turned around, leaving his back to the pod.

The ball? The thing that pod spit out. It was a bite? It had been crushed and sucked dry.

He looked up at the rock ledge he had just walked under. It wasn't just a few rocks falling. A bite had been up there. It was one of the huge ones. He could tell by the space that was now empty. It didn't fall? Had it jumped? An ambush predator? “It was an ambush predator. That thing was going to attack whatever came under that ledge. Those long feelers coming out the front of it could be pressure sensitive?” He paused to watch a group of smaller bites converge on the ball.

Cannibals? Smaller bites began to nip off pieces of the ball. They're nipping grew quicker and the morsels grew bigger. With the activity, larger bites began to show up. Then the frenzy started. The little monsters. None of them cared if they were taking chunks from the ball or from each other. Occasionally, one of the small bites, would get sucked underground. None of the other bites seemed to notice. The man moved away from the carnage.

Suddenly, it dawned on him. The pod had saved him. But its actions didn’t seem too safe. “It’s a predator too.” He had been backing away from the frenzy. He stopped suddenly. He turned around. The pod moved.

“I can't help you with your suit on.” Sarae stated.

“I don't understand? What are you doing here? You're supposed to be back on Earth.” The man replied.

Sarae returned, “Your suit isn't working right. You’re almost out of air. I must get you safe. But if you stay in your suit, you'll suffocate. Please let me help you?”

“The lifeboat.” He mumbled nearly out of breath. “The lifeboat.”

Sarae responded, “I know. We may need that later. Right now, we need to get you out of the suit before you suffocate. Please let me help you?”

“Okay, Sarae.” The helmet fell to the ground. Most of the suit followed. He smiled. He was in the arms of his wife again. “Sarae, I don't understand.” He lay in her sweet embrace.

“It’s okay, I'll explain in the morning. Go to sleep now. Rest. You'll feel better then.” Sarae tenderly kissed his forehead.

The man slept.

They were in a small, well-lit amber room. There were no doors, windows or light sources evident. “So, we need to activate the lifeboat?” The man glanced at the flimsy tunics that he and

Sarae were wearing. “I can't activate the lifeboat if I'm not in my suit. The lifeboat attaches to the back of the suit and....”

Sarae interrupted him. “I've looked at your suit. It doesn't seem to want to work.”

“Didn’t you say you only need the room? If I'm wearing my suit, I can make it form a bubble. You said the eight-foot diameter would be big enough? If I'm in the suit, I can make it work. All I have to do is attach the lifeboat to the back, and pull the cord. It works off compressed air.”

“I think I understand now. I believe your bubble will work.” Sarae nodded as she figured things out. “Okay, we can do this. But I will have to patch the leg on your suit up myself. Marcus, we can do this even if your suit does not work right. We will be able to save you.”

“Sarae, you did mean save us? We're going to get out of here together?”

“Yes, of course, Marcus. We're going to save us.” She reached out to him. “Now come here and rest. I will need time to prepare, and you will need your rest.”

The man slept in the loving embrace of his Sarae.

“I don't understand, you should be dead. No one should be able to live on this planet without a suit or something?” Sarae stood face to face with Marcus. He was in a suit. She was not.

Sarae replied, “Yes, I know. That's why you have to pull the cord. I'm very much inside out right now.”

Marcus pulled the cord. The expansion of the lifeboat shook him to his core. He nearly fell over. The pressure seal on the back of the suit released. He sat down. Then he crawled through the back of the suit into the bubble. He wondered why she said she was very much inside out right now. That statement didn't seem to make any sense. He smiled to himself. Some part of him knew the answer, and her being with him seemed to make it unimportant. He went about the task of setting up the lifeboat and making the suit detachable. He paused. She must have fixed the suit? It's not leaking. Where was Sarae? His thoughts returned to the tasks ahead.

Sarae crawled face first out of the back of his suit. She appeared very much as she did in the amber room. “I opened up the black iris like you said, and I plugged the string into your suit.” She pointed to a box in front of Marcus. “Ooh, what's in the package?”

Marcus replied, “Good, the solar panels will help the suit stay charged. You know, that'll help run the air recycler and the water purifier.” He glanced down. “Food bars. It's enough for thirty days, but I think I can stretch it.” Somehow, instinctively, he knew that she would not eat.

Sarae smiled as he spoke.

Talking seemed to make her happy. So, he continued. “This box has sixty bars with a water pouch for each bar. Two bars a day.”

Sarae wondered out loud, “Could you live on one bar a day? Could you get more time that way?”

Marcus replied, “No, one bar a day wouldn’t be enough. I’d starve to death doing that, but I could skip a bar every two or three days. I might be able to get another two weeks out of this box. And the suit will process my liquid waste.” His words trailed off at the end.

Sarae added, “Into drinkable water.” She sat next to him.

“Yes.” Marcus spoke, “You know there's not much to do in here?” He pulled her closer to him.

Sarae leaned back. “That's good. Soon, neither of us will have the energy to do much of anything. I believe I will have to help you heal.”

A short time later Marcus was asleep. He did not get what he went after, but he was comfortable in the arms of Sarae.

“Where does the light come from?” Marcus inquired as he looked around a larger amber room.

“It’s absorbed by the outer surfaces and reflected in.” Sarae stood next to him in her off white tunic.

“And this is just like where you're from?” Marcus asked cautiously not wanting to damage his illusion of Sarae.“This will be our place of refuge until you are safe. It is one of the easiest images for me to create.”

Sarae was not finished speaking, but Marcus interjected anyway, “You mean us? Until we are safe?”

“Of course, Marcus. Until we are safe.” Sarae paused, “Most of the structure has an organic shape. You will find that everything has a smooth rounded edge....” Sarae continued her description of the structure. Together they sat in a large round enclave surround it by washed out rust and little black monsters. “You would call this dome at the back end of the structure a reliquary. This is where the honored one is kept....” It had become commonplace now. They would sit together and talk. A short time would pass. Then, they would sleep. Maybe, it was just Marcus who slept.

Sarae knew someone would come for him.

Marcus didn’t know how long he had laid in the hospital bed. He didn't know how long he had stayed on that planet, or how long it had been since they come for him. He didn't even know that planet’s name. To Marcus it was just a group of random letters and numbers that came up on a list. How could he name such a place. It was a toxic rust colored ball full of monsters. Who would want a name such a place?

Marcus lay next to Sarae in their amber citadel. Sarae spoke, “You'll be safe now. The others have come for you. They will find your caregiver, and they will bring her to you. You will be safe then.”

Marcus inquired, “What about you, Sarae? What will happen to you? I know you didn’t belong on that toxic cesspool of a planet.”

Sarae responded, “Marcus, you do know, I am not like you.”

Marcus interrupted, “Sarae, I do know that you are different from my other Sarae. I do know that you're not her. That's not what I'm talking about. You just seem to care more about saving me than saving yourself? I don't want to see you sacrifice yourself for me. You are kind, honorable, intelligent and my friend. I want you to live. More than that, I want you to want to live.”

Through Sarae Marcus heard a voice from the outside, “I have spoken to the Honored One, and the Honored One will not relinquish this being. This being must be rejoined to their caregiver for the release to happen.”

An unknown voice spoke, “Forgive me, Ambassador, but he is getting the best possible care. The hospital is full of caregivers. That is all these people do. I don't know what else we could do for him. Couldn't you just tell it to let him go?”

The ambassador replied, “We have never asked them for anything. They do as they choose. Offer or not offer, give or take is their decision to make. We most certainly do not make requests of them. To do so would insult all the honored ones. And we do not call an honored one by the pronoun it.”

The voices faded away. Sarae started to say something about Marcus needing his rest; then, Marcus spoke up. “Sarae, you have seen my life, and I know you have shared much of yours. But I believe you are holding something back from me. Normally, I would allow you your privacy. But I think this secret means your life. And I want you to live.”

Sarae reached out her hands to Marcus as she prepared to reflect what he had said. “I must say, humans are not what I expected. Marcus, I will consider what you have said. As an honorable being I can at least give my friend an explanation. Now, it is time for you to rest.” She smiled warmly at Marcus. “I believe it is time for both of us to rest.”

“Sarae, where do you go when you leave the room?” He asked out of the need to break the silence. The amber room had six doors now as well as the reliquary. He knew that all the doors lead him back to the same place. He returned to the darkness that was his mind, but he didn't know where Sarae went.

Sarae held him in her arms. “Yes, I know you still have questions. I'll explain as much as I can when you wake. Right now, you need your rest. Your body and mind need to heal. I'm sure, you'll feel better in the morning. We'll talk then.” She lightly kissed him on the forehead. “Sleep.”

Marcus was on his third set of push-ups when Sarae entered the amber room. She gazed at him comically, “You are aware that your body will gain no benefit from exercising in here?”

He answered her, “Don't look so amused. I was just trying to pass some time. It's not very fun being here by myself. At least, when you leave, you're hooked up to your senses. When I go back, I just get darkness.”

“Marcus, I have that answer. That is part of the news I have learned. Your healers fear that I have damaged you, and they have pushed you into something they call a ‘medical coma.’ This thing they have done blinds you, but it also makes you heal quicker. I have heard that it will be undone in the short while. This will be done when the other Sarae arrives.”

For a brief moment, Marcus stared at her blankly. He had wondered why she had not come sooner.

Sarae continued, “I did not hear when this would be.”

“So, my body is healing?” Marcus paused. “Sarae, what are they doing to you? You said they thought you were hurting me. What are they doing to you? Are they hurting you?” Each word grew louder and more intense.

Sarae stated calmly, “Such a thing would not be permitted. It would not be allowed. I believe your people understand that doing so would mean war.”

Marcus wondered just how important Sarae really was? And who held her in such high regard? Other than himself.

Sarae sat next to Marcus on the floor of the amber room. “I believe you have guessed many things about me already. It is now time for me to tell you what you cannot guess. My people are called the Honored Ones by the people you call aliens. We have lived among them for many generations, but we are not like them. And we are not like you; we are not like your people. In your mind we would be both plant and animal, technology and magic, life and not life. We are one and many at the same time. This does not make us better than any other beings. It does make us different. Plus, my people have the ability to create technology out of life.”

Marcus nodded. “Your people can create living technology? That's how you made my suit work.”

Sarae took his nod to mean that he understood. “Marcus, I have been broken off from my people. Many of us were. I was taken from the stream of life to be what you would call a lifeboat. I'm living technology designed to protect one individual. When this task was complete; we were to return home. All who survived the war rejoined the stream of life except for one. I alone failed to save my individual and lived. I was on that planet as an exile. I went there to wait for my death. No other events can change what I must do. When you are safe and rejoined with your caregiver I will return to that world. I will complete my task. I will follow my people’s traditions and wishes.”

Quietly Marcus asked, “The only reason you saved me was because you were programmed to save people?”

Sarae replied, “No. I was not programmed to save a human. If we were still fighting the war, my programming would not have allowed me to help you.” Sarae paused for what seemed like the longest time. “I simply did not want to watch another living being die in pain.”

“Sarae, I believe I'm going to return the favor. With or without your permission, I'm going to convince you to live.”

“What if you cannot do so?” she inquired.

Marcus thought for a few minutes before he replied, “Then I will go with you, and be with you, until you pass from this existence. I will not let you die in pain alone.”

“Marcus, there's one other thing you must understand. Even if I live, I can never return to my people. I cannot bring them the grief and shame that I feel. To do this would bring the end to my family line. The other Honored Ones simply would not permit it.”

Marcus gently pulled Sarae to him. “Sarae, if there's a work around will find it. If you didn't know this already, humans can be very stubborn.” Marcus smiled his best human smile. “Now, Sarae try to go to sleep. We can talk about this in the morning. I'm pretty sure you'll feel better in the morning.” Marcus lightly kissed Sarae on her forehead. They slept holding onto each other in the reliquary of the amber room.

A short amber fin covered the center of his back from his neck to his waist. It would have been difficult to notice except for the red streak running over his spine. The Ambassador spoke, “If you do as I instruct no harm will come to you. I believe you may be the only one that can bring him back into this world. Please proceed, when you are ready.”

Sarae asked, “All I have to do is put my hands on the amber fin, and then I'll see this honored one?”

The Ambassador replied, “Yes, it will be fine. You are expected. Try not to be shocked by the images you see. No harm can come to you.”

Sarae awkwardly nodded. “Yes Sir. I'll try.” With trembling hands, she reached out to the amber and red.

The honored one spoke first, “Hello, Sarae. Please forgive my appearance. It was the first and strongest image I could find with Marcus. No, he's not here right now. I believe it is best if we met first.”

Sarae quickly scanned the room. “I was told about you. Your appearance. But I wasn't expecting the room.”

The honored one continued, “Once you have become accustomed to this place Marcus will come for you. It won't take very long. I'm sorry to say, but your visit with him today cannot be very long. We will speak once more before you go.” With the last words the honored one disappeared.

Sarae turned to see Marcus beside her. He anxiously inquired, “You’re the real human Sarae?”

She smiled and reached for his hand. They spoke until it was time for him to fade back into his mind. This was when the honored one returned. She spoke, “To my people you would be called Marcus’s caregiver. To save Marcus's life, I had to assume the role of caregiver. We both know the things that you have done. For reasons I do not understand, Marcus still believes you should have the role of caregiver. It is not my place to agree or disagree. I am only here to offer you a gift. I will show you how Marcus truly sees you.” There was no place for Sarae to go. She could not escape the honored one's grasp. Her hands gripped Sarae’s head.

Sarae fell to her knees. She looked up at the honored one as she spoke, “After everything I've done, he still sees me like that. I don't deserve his forgiveness. I don't deserve his love.”

The honored one returned, “No, you do not, but you can. You must once again become the caregiver.”

The amber room and the honored one drifted out of her mind. Sarae looked up at the ambassador and said, “Thank you ambassador. I think I understand now.”

They were all aliens. Very much like Marcus they all had an amber pod on their back. It was hard to say how many they were, but they filled the amber room. This time the room was real. They had spent most of the day being indignant and explaining things no one wanted to know.

Sarae finally spoke, “I am Sarae Codey. I have come to speak on behalf of the Honored One I call Sarae and my husband Marcus. I didn’t come here to demand anything. I'm here to request your advice and your knowledge. I speak for them because they will not speak for themselves. I called the honored one Sarae because she is my friend.”

There was a slight rumbling in the crowd.

Tears came too Sarae’s eyes. “She is the bravest, kindest, most honest, and smartest friend I have ever had. I understand that she cannot rejoin with you. I am not here to argue that. I only wish to know if there is another path besides death for my friend.”

A tall long face being stepped forward. He spoke before Sarae could say another word. “Soon, she will be released from her bond. She does not have a choice in this. When this occurs, there are only two paths left for your friend. One is death. The other is to become. We have considered this. It too is our wish that she lives.”

The expression on Marcus’s face changed from flat to curious.

The long-faced aliens moved aside forming a path to the reliquary. One of them spoke, “She has been deemed worthy to become.” They all pointed to the reliquary. This one was not empty. The being in it resembled an amber tree trunk with red veins running through it. It was Sarae’s progenitor. On its branches hung small green pods resembling what Marcus had found on the horrible world. “This Honored One wishes this as well.”

They continued speaking, “Wife Sarae and friend Marcus for Honored Sarae to do this there will be a price. This act will bond your family to Sarae for all time. You and your family will become caretakers. Go to King George Island. It is the closest habitable island to the Antarctic. This will become Sarae’s new home. It is the only suitable place for her to live on your world. This is where she will build the reliquary that both of you have seen in her mind.”

The ambassador turned to Sarae and Marcus, “I have made all the arrangements. All you need to do is to agree to become caretakers. Sarae will then be given one last command.”

Marcus, Sarae, and Sarae spoke in unison, “To become.”

By M. J. Fairchild

From: United States