Regrets? Not I

“If you had it to do again, would you?” The expression on her face, tubing in her arms, the beep of the machine and her head resting on a pillow warned me to craft my response carefully. Would I? the thought echoed. There are things I would do differently; study harder, be more resolute about my future and career. Overall, however, I have no regrets regarding choices I made or their consequences.

In that moment of thinking I realized how much she had sacrificed, and how selfish I was. She raised four children while I chased an education. She stayed at home when I took the only vehicle we owned. I recalled a Professor asking me when I was going to finish my degree and assume responsibilities at home. He said he saw her walking across campus, and her coat lining was hanging. Did I regret those inequalities? Not at that time, but I certainly do now

It is not the things I did that I would regret; it’s the things I didn’t do. True, some of the saddest quotes begin with the phrase: I shoulda’, I woulda ’or what if? There were many times I might have used one of them. Realizing my inefficiencies, I think of the example she provided and knew I was no comparison to her standard.

Would I do it again? In a New York second, I thought. The places we lived, the work we did, the people we met, even the food we ate were reflections of her influence. My single, but greatest choice was her; a choice for which she repaid me several times. She was always at my side...well, almost always. She refused to sit beside me while attending one of our children’s athletic events. Like many others she did not tolerate my verbal abuse of umpires and referees. I respected her opinions and brash honesty, but I refused to change.

“As we grew older together the tables turned. Throughout a lifetime I depended on her. Then she began to depend, more, and more on me. I cherished the opportunity; I flashed my chivalry, and displayed my manners. My behavior prevented her loss of self-esteem while providing a source of pride.

I was always directly behind her, big wheels at her side. I assured her comfort before seating myself. We went where she wanted to go, did what she wanted to do, and shared every moment. My daily goal was to fulfill her every need. I will never regret those times

Would I do it again?”Absolutely!

By Robert L. Scarry

From: United States

Twitter: usnavy1990

Facebook URL: www.Facebook.com.Robert.scarry.3