Cuckoo In The Nest

This piece describes my sense of freedom after getting divorced.

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My ex-husband had a

Nickname for me: Cuckoo.

I don’t think it was an

Endearment, more a

Statement of fact as

He was a plain speaking

German, baffled and

Probably hurt by my

Stubborn inability to

Settle in his gemutlich

Family nest. After all I

Was English, an only

Child and he was a

Fraternal twin. He also

Compared my parents

To robins, rearing an

Unwieldy chick, who

Also outgrew their

Sheltering wings. I

Believe now that he

Was right, as cuckoos

Are indeed nature’s

Only children: free,

Selfish and unconstrained

By family ties. They

Are changelings from

Another world they

Hanker for, rather

Than the squabbling

Nurture of siblings.

Even in marriage, I was an

Interloper. I failed to

Recognise that twins

Took precedence in

His family-tree; sharing

A heart and soul, in the

Words of my mother-in-law.

I did not understand, even

In translation, why my

Sister-in-law hated

Any woman who dared

Misplace her birthright

Over a womb from which

She had emerged first.

She led, he followed:

I trailed behind, because

Three’s a crowd, especially

When one of them blanks

You when you’re in the

Same room, let alone

The same womb. I was the

Clamp which shut off her

Life-blood from

Their maternal placenta.

I was the unwanted

Triplet, who could not be

Left to starve quietly

In a side-ward; I had

To be drip-fed acceptance

Through my marital status;

Lulled into complicity by

The myth of family romance.

But I screamed for air as I

Stifled, drowning, in their

Amniotic closeness. I have

Strong lungs and my call

Became more insistent as I

Realised that the egg of my

Marriage had hatched out an

Intruder, an ill-fitting piece

That they longed to expel from

Their family’s tidy jigsaw-box:

I bent its corners out of shape.

Only when I saw outside it

Could I realise what a puzzle

I was to them. Divorce opened

The window and out I flew

Calling in relief that now I am

On the outside, looking in.

By Kate Meyer-Currey

From: United Kingdom

Instagram: DrKMC