Suffering Pleasure

I had to light candles throughout my Studio apartment not so much as to create a romantic or Gothic ambience, but instead to be able to navigate around my four hundred square foot living space with a small amount of light. Evidently, it seems my memory has been on a bender. Once again it got drunk and forgot to pay the electric bill. The Electric and Power guy pointed out I've used that somewhat creative as well as almost humorous excuse far too often. The novelty has worn off with the consequence being orders to confiscate the Electric Meter and return it to the office. Which meant he couldn't just pull it out, turn it upside down, and push it back in. The company mid-level suits had become aware of me pulling it out then placing it back into the service restoring my power after the power guy left. I guess I'll be playing pioneer for a while. I should stock up on candles or get one of those oil lamps. Although my neighbors are leaving on vacation for a month tomorrow. So I'll be able to jump their electric power and their Cable, which I think is still hooked up from the last time I tapped in. Then I'll try to find some way to get my T.V. out of hock or possibly just borrow one of my neighbors. This guy will be living like a suburban scumbag in no time at all. I got it all worked out.

"This has to stop Santiago. There's no future in what you refer to as a recreational activity." I said out loud.

" Ya I know. I've gotta straighten up." I answered back with a four a.m. honesty.

"When do you think that might happen?"

" I'm not sure. It may manifest as a revelation or an epiphany? Maybe they'll be an intervention, or the never-fail cure, incarceration."

"It doesn't matter. You've gotta get clean. This is just no fun anymore. "

" You look at life as though it's a parade and you just watch it pass by. The last float will be coming soon signaling your demise."

My voice echoed in the near empty apartment.

" Ya, it'll happen. I just can't say when." I answered in a sincere tone. Even I didn't believe myself.

I stabbed the syringe deep into my vein. I didn't even have to pull back on the plunger to register. My dark, thick, rich, red, blood billowed into it offering a crimson preview of the explosion about to erupt inside my body.

Boom!

By Judge Santiago Burdon

From: Costa Rica