Crushed

Keith is awoken by his alarm. The morning sun is streaming in through the window of his room and into his eyes. It's bright and warm, and for once Keith feels good in bed—not even sore from the night before. The bed shifts as Lance rolls over beside him, stretching out languidly. His hair is sticking up every which way and he has the smallest sheen of sweat on his forehead. He looks like nothing more than a hot mess.

Keith rolls onto his stomach so that he can watch Lance while he gets ready. When Lance turns away from the mirror, Keith catches sight of some of the purple bruises that litter his torso—mostly ones around his ribs, but one along the side of his neck too. They aren't as bad as they look, though. Probably just bruised from training. He wonders how long it will take them to heal.

When Lance finishes getting dressed, he walks into the bathroom across the hall and closes the door behind him. The shower head comes to life with a loud pop and starts dripping water down on Lance's naked body. As the sound of water hitting skin fills Keith's ears, something nags at the back of his mind. This isn't what he normally wakes up to when he gets up this early. What are his responsibilities today? Why doesn't he feel any pressure?

"Hey!" Keith calls. "Are you alright?" The sound of water being poured into someone else's sink reaches his ears and Lance opens the door again to answer him.

He wipes the fogged glass with his fingers and takes a sip of water before replying. "Yup! Just feeling extra energetic." He steps out into the hallway and crosses over to where Keith is sitting. "What about you? You're up earlier than usual." He sits next to Keith and wraps an arm around his shoulders. Keith shrugs off Lance's arm and stares up at him instead.

Lance smiles softly. "Yeah," Keith says. Something feels different, but he can't quite place it right away. Maybe it's just because he's finally getting used to sleeping in the same room as Lance without having to pretend to sleep alone. Yeah, that sounds about right, he thinks. "I guess I'm not used to waking up so early. Usually, the others are awake first." Lance nods understandingly but there's something strange in the curve of his brow. It's almost like he wants to say something.

But then another thought strikes Keith; if Lance were planning on saying something, why was he acting so oddly?

"Anyway..." He pushes the thought out of his mind. "What do we have planned for today?"

Lance smiles and rubs the back of his neck. "Hm, let's see…" He pulls his cell phone out of his pocket and unlocks it. "Oh yeah, we've been talking to Shiro about going undercover tomorrow. Apparently, our cover will be blown pretty soon anyway." He taps on the screen a few times, scrolling through something. "We'll also need to find a new disguise for Allura... Oh! And Pidge wanted to talk to Hunk about her new drone. But we should probably leave Coran out of all of this." He holds his phone out to show Keith the conversation he'd been looking at.

It's a conversation between Hunk and Pidge asking him what their current disguises might look like. "Pidge wanted to know your exact idea," he explains. "She mentioned something about her wanting it to reflect the color of your skin." He puts his hand on Keith's arm gently and raises an eyebrow. "What do you think?"

Keith thinks about it and then shakes his head. "I don't know," he says. "Maybe… maybe we can change our hair. Like we did yesterday when we first arrived here. Or…" He bites his lip. "We could try wearing sunglasses. That would give us some kind of… disguise, I guess."

Lance laughs and pinches Keith' s cheek. "I love your creativity," he says. Then he pauses for a moment, thoughtful. "But I wouldn't want to use my own hair as a disguise. We already know each other well enough as it is, and I don't feel comfortable putting something in your hair."

Keith wrinkles his nose. "Well, I don't feel comfortable either, but it sounds better than letting the others make us up."

Lance hums. "True." He gives Keith another playful shove. "Now come on, breakfast is starting!"

They walk together down to the dining room, passing Coran on his way out. They both greet each other and continue down the stairs. At the bottom, they enter the kitchen and spot everyone already seated at the table. There's a bowl full of pancakes in front of Keith and some fruit in front of Shiro, as well as a large mug of coffee. He takes a seat in the empty spot to his left, Lance taking the chair on his right.

Shiro raises an eyebrow. "Good morning, boys," he says. "Did you two sleep well?"

Lance shrugs. "As well as you can, I suppose. My pillow is lumpy, though, and I kept turning over during the night. Did anything interesting happen during the rest of your evening?"

"Not really," Shiro replies. He leans forward in his seat and rests his elbows on the table, folding his hands neatly under his chin. "Mostly meetings, diplomatic visits with neighboring planets."

Allura glances towards Keith. "And how are you doing? I trust you slept well? Are you ready for the mission tomorrow?"

Keith frowns and looks down at his empty plate. Yesterday was such a busy day... He knows he said yes, but still... "Uh, I'm fine," he says. "Actually, I was thinking of making something."

"Like what?" Lance asks. "You know that none of us can cook."

"That's true." Keith scratches the back of his neck nervously. "There's… Well, it's not much…" He looks over at Shiro for support, who just watches Keith with a puzzled expression. "We'll have to borrow a couple of ingredients from the kitchen."

"You mean from outside?" Lance clarifies. "From the Altean planet?" Keith nods, trying to seem casual. "That doesn't sound so bad! Do you remember what they look like?"

He does. In fact, he remembers everything. "Yes," he says. "A little bird told me." He grins at Lance, who returns the gesture. "Come on!"

After finishing his breakfast, he excuses himself and hurries upstairs. The only thing he wants to do now is clean up before anyone sees the evidence of his crime—or rather, his lack thereof—in his room. Keith grabs a sponge and a bucket and heads into the bathroom. The water is still running and he quickly rinses out the soap, then wrings it out and sets it aside. Grabbing his toothbrush and paste, he begins brushing his teeth.

Suddenly, someone knocks on his door, forcing him to jump. A second later, it swings open, and Keith freezes in shock. Standing before him is Pidge, holding her backpack tightly against her chest. She clears her throat and Keith swallows.

"Hi, Pidge." He tries smiling but he doesn't think he manages very well.

"Good morning, Keith." Pidge shuts the door slowly behind her and slips past him. "Can I ask a question?"

"Uh, sure." He follows Pidge into the bathroom. She stands on the tips of her toes to reach the top shelf of the cabinet above the sink. Her arms stretch up as far as they go and she grabs a jar of shampoo and drops it onto the countertop. Keith blinks as he stares at Pidge's back.

"Okay, well…" Pidge continues to rummage in the cabinet while speaking. "Why did you get hit by the comet?" Keith furrows his eyebrows at her. "Don't play dumb," she adds as she climbs down to stand on the floor again. She faces him once more and crosses her arms. Her eyes narrow slightly and her brows pull together.

Keith sighs and scratches the back of his neck. "I got caught up in something." He looks at his shoes, unable to meet Pidge's gaze. He didn't even realize until a few minutes ago exactly what caused the accident.

"Is it about Lance?"

The question catches Keith by surprise. He looks up and finds Pidge staring back with a knowing glint in her eye. His cheeks flush red instantly, embarrassed that the whole situation had gotten out this fast. But how is he supposed to explain everything now? It's not really a matter of telling the truth, he supposes, it's just more convenient to tell the story that way. He doesn't really know what lie he'll choose anymore. Does he tell them the truth or lie to spare his friend's feelings?

"I… uh, kinda kissed him." He feels his face grow even warmer as soon as those words leave his mouth. He doesn't even bother waiting for Pidge to respond before continuing. "Yesterday was… weird, y'know? And then yesterday evening when the team had a meeting I decided to go for a midnight snack before bed. So I went outside and found him there sitting on one of the trees. When I approached, he started laughing about something and turned around to kiss me…"

He trails off and looks down at his feet again, suddenly wishing they were anywhere else except where they are. Suddenly feeling embarrassed and guilty all over again. He wishes his friends wouldn't be seeing this side of him. It's embarrassing.

"So, what happened next?" Pidge asks after an uncomfortable amount of silence. Her voice has taken on a light teasing tone that sends shivers down Keith's spine. She probably thinks it's funny. What an idiot. He sighs.

"I tried to move away and run, but he grabbed my wrist and pulled me towards him. I didn't know what to do or why he'd done it, but I figured I should try to push him away. I wasn't actually trying to hurt him, but then I was pulling at his sleeve because I didn't want him touching me, and…" Keith pauses, trying to calm down. How does he explain this? It feels too humiliating. He closes his eyes tightly and exhales sharply.

When he opens his eyes again, Pidge is watching him curiously. Her gaze flickers across his face like she's trying to decipher his thoughts. He knows if she weren't the person who helped him find this journal he would've given up long ago and moved on. Now, though, he's not so certain. Maybe it's her presence here, perhaps the warmth of their friendship that made him open up, or maybe it's just something about the circumstances surrounding these events. Either way, something inside of him feels different. It's hard to describe, but it's like… a different kind of confidence has returned to Keith. Something that feels different from just a year ago. He feels brave. Like he isn't afraid anymore.

"Yeah, okay," he says softly. "I think it's time to talk about all that."

Pidge nods and gestures towards the stool in front of the sink. She lowers herself to sit down on it. Keith sits down as well and pulls his legs up onto the seat, tucking his knees underneath his thighs. For a moment, neither boy speaks. They watch each other through the mirror in silence, each trying to figure out what the other is thinking. After several seconds of silence, Pidge finally breaks the silence.

"So…" she starts. "Are you gonna tell me what happened?"

Keith takes a deep breath and releases it before starting his story.

"Well, I guess I should start at the beginning…

"I never really liked Lotor. We were partners during our training sessions, but he was always just a step ahead of me." Keith shakes his head as he remembers the first time the Galran Prince appeared in their class. Everyone thought he was a good student, but no one thought twice about his behavior. To Keith, it was just another obstacle in the road he knew he would have to overcome. As the years passed, the obstacle seemed ever larger and yet ever closer at the same time. 

Until one night in particular. 

Keith stands in front of the simulator with his hand up, waiting for the timer to run down. He keeps his gaze down as he waits, but then suddenly hears footsteps approaching him from behind. Keith turns around and meets Lotor's curious gaze. He's holding what looks to be a pair of scissors in his hand. 

"Oh," Lotor says in a nonchalant voice. "It seems someone needs assistance." Before Keith can react, Lotor has already pushed him backwards and pressed the blades of the scissors into Keith's neck. He looks up to see Lotor grinning down at him, the smug look in his eyes almost enough to send Keith into panic mode. Keith clenches his fists.

"What are you doing?"

Lotor leans down a little bit and presses the scissors even harder against Keith's skin. "Just giving you a taste of your own medicine," he replies. He reaches his arm forward so Keith can see the scissors attached to it. "And to show you how serious I am," he says, pressing a button on his knife. The blade flashes bright green as it slices deeper into his throat.

As the blood begins to flow, Lotor lets him fall to the ground. Keith clutches his throat in pain as he rolls around on the floor. The last thing he sees before he passes out is Lotor's triumphant grin before darkness consumes his vision entirely. 

The sound of the alarm wakes Keith up. Blinking rapidly, he looks around frantically, wondering what happened, until he notices that someone is crouched in front of him, shaking him lightly. It takes a few seconds, but eventually Keith realizes that it's Katie.

"Hey," she whispers. "Sorry to wake you up. Just wanted to make sure you're okay." Keith groans and rubs the sleep from his eyes as best as he can. "Didn't you hear the alarm?" he asks.

"I know. That's why I came to check on you." Katie frowns at him concernedly. "What happened?"

For a moment, he stays quiet. His stomach twists uncomfortably, almost making him want to throw up. Then, remembering Pidge's request, he takes another deep breath before starting.

"Um, I'm pretty sure I ran into Lotor last night." He sees Katie's eyes widen slightly, obviously surprised that this is what he chooses to focus on.

"What? Why?" Her hands fly to her mouth as she gasps, her eyes wide. She jumps to her feet, causing Keith to follow suit. "Why didn't you call us? Are you okay? Do you need anything?" Katie's questions come faster and faster until she's practically yelling. "Do we need to go see Dr. Coran?" Keith quickly puts his hand on her shoulder, stopping her short. She glances back at him with wide eyes before lowering her gaze to the ground.

"I'm fine," Keith assures. "We don't need to go to the hospital. Besides, Lotor didn't really touch me that much… I mean, besides that stupid knife."

Katie still doesn't seem satisfied with Keith's answer, but she nods anyway. Keith's heart aches as he watches her walk over to one of the shelves and take a book from the bookcase….

By Helen R. Steel