A brief essay on the loss of my best friend. Inspired by the prompt, "Time of Death".

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I think part of her died the day she was diagnosed. Pancreatic Cancer. She once told me she would have taken any other Cancer: breast, liver, colon, stomach. The survival rate for Pancreatic Cancer is 9%. I was convinced that my best friend, Sonya, would be one of those 9%. Sonya was one of those people, one of those who “lit up the room” just by being present.

About 6 months after her death, I was watching The Colbert Show. Helena Bonham Carter was on as a guest and Colbert was asking her to “spill the tea” or as we say in the United States, “spill the beans”, on celebrities she has worked with. When questioned about Brad Pitt, she said it was like “he swallowed the Sun”. That was Sonya; she opened her mouth and ingested the sun. The Sun chose her and decided to reside in her body.

I never felt that this Cancer, this irrelevant, human thing could take her. My soul felt that the orb inside of her would incinerate the ugly tumor that tried to attack her.

About a week before she passed, she asked me how I felt about this whole thing. I told her I was in denial, she said, “me too”. I couldn’t allow myself to believe that the Universe would take the Sun out of its orbit. What I didn’t realize was the power she would leave behind.

It was a warm, sunny day when she passed, at least that is how I viewed it. Watching the light move from her eyes created insurmountable pain. It felt like the air had left my lungs, I wasn’t sure I would make it past her death, but I realized that what she left behind was her Sun, it continues to shine even on the worst of days.

Those of us lucky enough to have known her use the phrase, WWSD, “What would Sonya Do?” during our trying times.

We all grieve differently, during my moments of grief, I sometimes like to think that Sonya is in another Universe, where light is desperately needed, she opens her mouth and allows the light that she has so gracefully swallowed, to spill out over those who have been without for thousands of years and now, like us, they are blessed with her illumination.

By Christine Obst

From: United States

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