This is a short post, mostly about what my life has been like lately

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I'm not going to lie. I've been going offline, things haven't been right, inside is a mess, trying only seems like I'll miss. I'm pushing but life keeps throwing me back, the past keeps resurfacing, memories I thought were hidden now lay bare, I dug that whole and now they're out, things keep seeping in to my everyday and I can't do this, I'm not strong enough to relive it. I pushed it down and piled dirt on the box but someone still found it, history repeats itself, I should've believed it.

Another winter and another medication change, three years on meds and I'm still unstable, maybe some day I'll stop living this nightmare, maybe it'll stop once the nightmares actually stop.

But they won't stop, the chances of surviving this is slim, I'm nineteen but I've been through thirty years of trauma. I'm just a kid who was forced to be an adult, now look at me, look at me, a broken poet who lost their talent.

By Marina Vos