Grey Thoughts

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Oh Dear

Oh dear, we are not fortunate ones,

not born with silver spoon,

we eat with our hands bare

we struggle to find but do share,

our only privacy is our heart

where we keep everything

that we don’t want to share

unlike lavishing ways we

need to survive after we are born

and that’s we are taught and so we do,

we are guilty of loving dear,

so I won’t love you and you too don’t

because we are not fortunate ones,

we don’t dream we survive,

there’s no desire and no wants alive in us,

we survive because we are born

and we can’t die on our own

because we are not fortunate ones,

The people like me dear,  

are not the people like you dear,

we are taught we are not the same

that you despise us,

that god favours you,

and that we shouldn’t be like you.

On the edge of this survival mode  

I choked the love, care, education and everything

That I am taught  

I can’t stop myself from dreaming and desiring,

And slowly I let it grows insides me

And  

That had made all the differences.

I need more space to spread my wings dear,

But I am denying and hesitating,

And

This had made me realize,

This had made me clarify,

That

There were faults in our ways of loving,

Caring, teaching and surviving.

That we do need to live.

Sth that you don’t face with dear because

You have silver spoon, eat golden foods,

Wear long gowns that covers my entire lifespan,

And walks equally naked yet you are not a beggar,

And I don’t blame you dear because  

You were born with gloves on your hand,

Status on your name,

Dream on your eyes and

Desires on your neck.

Because that’s how you survive dear

And I won’t hate you for it.

Your family feud is entertainment but

Mine would be disgrace to my family so  

I am scared to open  

Your dating, marriage, affairs, money

Has even covered the vaccum

But I refuse to feel what I feel

We had our own wings we made to fly

But we are taught that sky is not for us

How humiliating !

That some of you dear, snatched our wings  

And feel the sky  

But

I don’t loathe you dear’

Please! don’t misunderstand me

I am just observing from what I lack now

And  

Nomore. Shall I nomore look at.

Because this is a teaching of the society

To not dream and only to complain.

To compromise and to accept the shame

That we are poor, helpless, small and nothing  

But the bunch of curses.

Want to come inside dear?

In the place where we survive?

Its not simple.

Just because we had not much of embellishments in our broken huts

We do not love our brokenness

And these broken wounds bleed

The raw art and emotion

But

We are taught to ignore and live with pain till the last breathe.

well

Yours dear, is decorated by eliminating the wounded flesh of your own

So yours not simple either.

But not all of us hate each other in our survival mode

I believe not all of you

Detest us too

From what I see,

I see  

We all want to love and to be loved.

We all want to fly high in the sky  

And run bare foot on the grass.

We all want to laugh louder  

And cry together too.

We all want to be alone with  

The stars, moon and the night

But when morning comes

We all want to dance with the partner.

We want to be absolutely alone  

And absolutely together

We all want to decorate the mother earth

and shine individually but together.

And  

That had made all the consequences  

Because  

We are human.

We are human dear,

The people from my world  

And the people from your world.

We want to be the best of all

But we do face the worst too.

We want to win

But we lose too.

As we grow, old clothes won’t fit us  

Regardless of our attachment.

We outgrow old to grow new

And that’s how the human race has been.

And that’s how the future has seen

The sacrifices of history

The cultivation of our emotions

The mistakes and lessons

And  

To grow as a humankind  

We need to grow individually.


By Honest Hypocrite

From: Nepal