Adam Weston pulled up to the kerb. He stared at the house through the windscreen and tried to gather his thoughts. This was it. It was time to admit everything and face the consequences. He knew what he had done was wrong. He knew he should have come sooner. It was time. Even if the outcome was bad for him, he would still feel better for it.

That night, eighteen months ago, his head was all over the place, the stress of work and life in general was just getting too much for him. He had been drinking too much and not thinking straight, that evening. And so, in an almost blind drunk state, he had climbed behind the wheel of his car, and driven off into the night. 

He hadn’t seen her in the road until it was too late. 

And in an act he had regretted ever since, he had sped off down the street, leaving the scene of the accident, leaving her in the middle of the road. 

In the days that had followed, he had paid close attention to the newspaper reports of the incident. She had been taken to hospital and thankfully had made a full recovery, being discharged after just over a week.

In the months since, Adam had cleaned his act up, got himself straight. He had packed in drinking completely, changed jobs and cars and felt like such a different person than he had been on that eventful evening. 

But the guilt was eating away at him. He could hardly face eating, and when he tried to sleep, the nightmares were horrific. He knew he had to see her, to confess to what he had done. He would go and see her, apologise, and beg for her forgiveness. He hoped they could talk it through, and they could even go to the police together. Then, he would take the punishment that was coming and she could get on with her life knowing justice had been done.

Nervous about exactly how this would go, he finally grabbed his briefcase and went up to the front door. He knocked gently, and waited. A moment later the door opened, and there she was. She was in her late twenties and wore a sweatshirt emblazoned with an American football team. She smiled warmly at him.

‘Hello, yes?’ She said.

Right here in the moment, the things he had prepared to say deserted him. He found the words stuck in his throat. How could he tell this person he was responsible for what had happened to her?

‘Sorry, erm, I don’t know quite how to put this. I don’t know where to start.’ He shrugged.

‘Are you selling something?’ She said.

‘How’s that?’

She pointed to his briefcase. Adam felt himself panic, the moment getting away from him. Before he knew it he lying about the reason for his visit.  

‘Yes, I work for a decking company and wondered if you’d like decking in your garden.’ He said.

‘Have you got a brochure or a card?’ She asked.

Adam nodded and rummaged in his coat pocket and handed her his card. 

‘Are you okay, love?’ She said.

‘I’ll leave you to it. Sorry to have bothered you.’ Adam said, turning to leave.

‘You don’t look well at all. Do you need to sit down? You look like you need a good strong cup of tea.’

Not quite sure exactly what he was doing, he followed as she ushered him in to her house.

When he was settled in the living room, on the sofa, with a cup of tea, she asked him how he was feeling. Still unsure quite what he was doing there, while knowing he should be having the difficult conversation, he simply nodded and said he was doing okay. 

‘I’m Nicki.’ she said. 

Adam nodded, he knew he should be saying how he knew who she was, and should be detailing what he did. 

Instead he found himself asking about her life. She explained how she worked in an office, had a large group of close friends and family, and was single.

Adam was surprised at how well they hit it off, they had the same silly sense of humour, and even a fondness for American sports. Nicki explained that she always booked the day after the Super Bowl off work, and would stay up all night to watch the game. Adam replied that he always did the same. During the World Series, depending on the time difference between UK and America, he would leave the television set in his bedroom on all night and drift in and out of sleep as the innings went on.

When he was leaving, Nicki waved the business card Adam had given her.

‘Would it be okay if I gave you a ring?’ She asked.

He sensed it was for more of a personal purpose than professional. She wasn’t interested in the decking, she didn’t want to see the brochure or to have a surveyor call out to check and measure her garden. Feeling it would have been rude to decline, he nodded and said he’d like that.

That evening, his mind raced. He couldn’t stop thinking about Nicki and what he had done. He had gone to see Nicki with the intention of coming clean and facing the music, and he had lost his nerve. He had panicked and not said a word of his true identity and what he had done. Rather than rectifying things, he couldn’t help feeling he had actually made things worse. 

As he was trying to lose himself in the action film on television his mobile phone pinged. The number was unknown but as he read the message he realised who it was from.

Hey, hope you’re feeling better. N. Xx

After an hour of pacing up and down on his living room carpet, Adam gave in and typed out a reply. He couldn’t help himself. 

Over the next few days there were so many messages between them. Adam enjoyed the exchange but at the back of his mind was that she did not know the truth. To her, he was simply a door-to-door salesman who had a funny turn on her doorstep, and they’d hit it off. Adam knew the truth. 

When Nicki suggested they meet up for a drink, Adam had quickly replied that he doesn’t drink. Coffee, then, do you drink coffee? Tap water even? Nicki had responded. 

Nicki waved from the table as Adam entered the coffee shop. And grinned and waved back, feeling like a teenager on his first date. He tried to tell himself it was not a date, and to remind himself of the real reason they were even in contact, but he also knew it was no good. He liked her, he really liked her. He couldn’t help it. 

The next time they met up was in a city centre bar. While Nicki sipped a glass of wine, Adam drank a lemonade. When she asked why he didn’t drink, Adam had simply replied that he used to have a problem knowing when he’d had enough. 

He really enjoyed spending time in her company and it really seemed his feelings were reciprocated. They were constantly in contact and would meet up regularly for drinks, meals, and one evening as they were saying good evening she leaned in and kissed him on the cheek.

That small gesture was the start of their relationship in earnest. It all seemed to be happening so very naturally. He pushed the niggling thoughts of how and why they had met to the back of his mind.

He tried to tell himself it was fate that brought them together, out of what could have been a tragedy something beautiful had grown. People met in all kinds of ways, didn’t they? Not that he would be telling her exactly what brought him to her door that evening. Adam tried to concentrate on the fact that he was a different person these days. Since that night he had had changed job, got a new car, and had stopped drinking.

One evening, when they had planned to go out for a meal, Nicki was stuck late at work. Adam really didn’t want to miss out on seeing her. He suggested he pick her up from work and that they go straight from the office to the restaurant. Nicki had complained that she’ll still have her work clothes on.

‘It doesn’t matter, you’ll look very smart.’ Adam insisted.

‘I dunno, love. I’d feel so awkward. I will look so obvious that I’ve just come from work.’ 

‘How about I wear my work gear too? I’ll leave my shirt and tie on and we’ll look like a couple of executives having a business meal. How does that sound?’ 

‘Okay, fine. I’ll see you here later.’ She said.

As she walked along the pavement to the car he waved. She smiled and hurried towards him. When she climbed in beside him, Adam leaned in and kissed her, asking if she’d had a good day. She nodded saying it had been such a long day, that she was so glad it was over.

The food in the restaurant was lovely, and they treated themselves to dessert. Adam explained how his uncle was having a fiftieth birthday bash in a few weeks. Everyone was going to be there, all the family. He asked if she would go with him.

‘Yes, of course. If you want me there, I’ll go.’ Nicki said.

‘It will be a chance to show you off to the family.’ Adam said.

The function room was packed with Adam’s family and his uncle’s friends. The DJ was playing the usual cheesy disco classics as well as lots of 90’s music to cater for the fifty year old birthday boy. Adam wore his best shirt and Nicki had treated herself to a new dress for the occasion. 

Adam proudly introduced Nicki to everyone. He grinned in delight as he introduced her as his girlfriend. Adam’s family made a fuss, hugging her and welcoming her to the family. His mother squeezed her hand tight saying she was a little treasure. 

Later in the evening, after the birthday cake had been presented and cut, and the buffet food had been devoured by the revellers, Nicki got up and crossed the dance-floor. She whispered in the DJ’s ear. The DJ handed her the microphone and turned the music volume down.

‘Adam, could you join me up here please?’ Nicki said, a bright smile on her face.

Confused, Adam reluctantly crossed the room to join her. His family and friends looked on, wondering if she was going to ask him to marry her. 

‘Good evening, everyone. It’s clear to see that Adam is a loving son, brother and uncle. He is a good friend, an all-round good guy.’ She paused while people clapped and cheered. Then her expression changed, suddenly deadly serious.

 ‘But he is also the same person who ran someone over and left them for dead. I believe they call it a hit and run.’ She said.

The colour drained from Adam’s face. He felt the room spinning around him. The crowd looked on, stunned. 

‘How dare you? You are a liar.’ Someone called out.

‘Am I?’ Nicki replied.  ‘I was that person. He drove me down and left me there. Ask him yourself.’

Nicki held out the microphone to Adam. He simply stood there, rooted to the spot, tears in his eyes, his cheeks burning red.

His parents stepped on to the dance-floor. His mother slapped him hard across the face while his father said he would never speak to him again. 

Nicki dropped the microphone, sending it thudding to the polished wooden floor, and headed outside. 

She stood in the cold darkness breathing hard, trying to gather her thoughts, to make sense of all the emotions running through her. She rubbed her arms, trying to comfort herself. The doors to the pub opened behind her.

She turned to see Adam standing in the doorway. He still looked shocked and his eyes were red with tears. He moved slowly, awkwardly, towards her. They faced each other in the glow of the streetlight.

‘Have you always known? Was this some plot for revenge?’ He asked. ‘I do actually have feelings for you.’ 

She shook her head, trying to find the words.

‘This wasn’t some grand plan, not at all.’ She said. ‘I had no idea who you were, what you did. It was when you picked me up from work that night, remember? It all came back to me, seeing you there, behind the steering wheel and the number plate was the same. Your personalised number plates. The car was different but the reg. number was the same. I didn’t recognise it until then, like some police reconstruction or something. It was a different car, but the numbers and the face behind the wheel, just brought everything back to me.’

Adam said nothing.

‘You left me in the street. I could have died for all you cared.’ Nicki said.

He nodded, there was nothing he could say in his defence. Finally he spoke.

‘All I can say is that I was a different person back then. That’s not the man I am today.’ He said.

She didn’t speak, simply stared at him, hurt and anger burning in her eyes. 

‘I don’t want to leave it like this.’ He said. ‘What can I do?’ 

‘I honestly do not know.’ Nicki said.

She turned and hurried away.

As she was getting ready for work one morning the following week, the radio news bulletin reported that a local man had handed himself in to the police, confessing to a hit and run going back almost two years. She stopped dragging the brush through her hair and was lost in thought for a long moment. 

Twelve months later Adam stepped out through the prison gates. He breathed in the outside air for the first time in what felt like years. As he squinted in the winter sunshine he heard footsteps walking towards him. Then he heard a familiar voice.

‘You look like you need a good strong cup of tea.’ 

He laughed and wiped the tears from his eyes.

By Chris Platt

From: United Kingdom